LWAB- i have actually started a thread as well so dont want MIL to be there at mine!

Yes the feeling of not getting on right now is coming across! maybe its your hormones and the being uncomfortable that is whats making me snap!

So, how do I get dp to agree with me and not go behind my back and tell his mum like last time???

He even text her to tell her that my waters had gone the day before labour started. He knew damn well I didnt want anyone to know.

Maybe I should just kick him out. Can you guess we arent getting on at the mo!

i think putting it on facebook and updating is a bit sad. Surely people have better things to be doing than that.
With ds1 i told dh, but my mum found out as her friend saw the ambulance outside and rang her to see if i was ok.
With ds2, my mum had ds1 for me, so I had to tell her.
It wasn't really that I didn't want them to know, I didn't really want the mil to know, as I knew she'd be ringing the ward to see what was happening and generally being a pain, like she was when sil went in.
As for visitors you don't have to have any one, if you don't want them. I told my mum not to inform one particular Aunt until I was home from the hospital as she's --an interfering grumpy old bag-- abit of a pain.
good luck and don't be pressured into doing anything you don't want.

We didn't tell anybody apart from the people looking after offspring with dd2 and dd3. With dd1 everybody knew as I was induced. Didn't bother me as all our family were content to sit it out quietly at home and not be mithering for news - though they all spent a fairly nervous 18 hours. I believe they'd all just gone to bed when dh rang with news - dd1 was born at 1.15am!

hi i think it really differs to you as a person and people should respect your wishes even if they dont understand the reasons behind it! Facebook is awful when it comes to secrets and privacy!
All my friends want to know so they can start a prayer chain,its nice to know so many people care but can be constant texting which doesnt help!

When i had my last DC my mum was around as well as my DH,mum passed 8months and now my dear MIL is assuming she will be there! i dont want her there because i really want my mum to be there of course she can, but only in spirit!
With this being a new hospital im hoping they will only allow one person in so i wont have to tell her that i dont want her there! i would rather my DSis or even my DD who is a teen!

Now is that bad?

I think we just told my mum and MIL last time, problem was it all kind of started on the Wednesday and DD was born on the Sunday...so DH had to give them daily updates which went mostly along the lines of yes, she's still having contractions, no the baby isn't here yet, yes everyone's fine. OK while we were still at home but got a bit fraught once we got to hospital on the Saturday morning. My mum was convinced that it was all going horribly wrong and DH just wasn't telling her. Hopefully it'll be quicker with the next one! I think it's a private thing, though and also by not telling people you're not potentially worrying them unnecessarily if things take a while .

I didn't want anyone knowing the first time around. As it was my first child I didn't know how things would go and I didn't want the added pressure of people ringing to find out what was happening. My mum was very put out that we didn't tell her.

The 2nd time around my MIL knew as she came over to look after DD1 but she was very unobtrusive and actually was lovely to have around - having given birth to 3 of her own all at home! Again my mum was cross to only have a call after the event.

I have quite long labours - a good 24-36 hours of build-up in the early stage where I know I'm in labour and it is hurting but not much is happening. If I told everyone straight away that I was in labour they would be worrying when they didn't hear anything 24 hours later so I just don't tell them.

I'll be the same this time around - my Mum might be staying to help out with DD1 and DD2 but not sure yet!

I find it a private time for me and H and don't really want the whole world poking their nose in!

my dad demanded on messenger live (thats the most communication we have, he lives in Tasmania with second wife and her small children) that I phone or text him when i go into labour. he has had no interest in me or the baby up until now, just before baby was due (due today but no sign of her yet.) I told him that we had so much to sort and arrange when i do i wont be phoning everyone, his response was, "i'll get one of your sisters to tell me then." noooo, cos im not telling them either. the only people who will know will be my mine and dh's mums, and only both cos i'll want my my mum to know in case of any emergency and dh's mum will probably be the child-care.

Could you tell him you don't want people worrying if it goes on a long time? MrNC told me when SIL went into labour about 3pm, sent me a 'still going' text about 9pm, and then nothing. At 7am I texted to ask if things were OK and turned out the baby had been born fine a few hours earlier - I'd have slapped him if he hadn't been miles away!

We weren't going to tell anyone else but as it happened my mum phoned MrNC shortly after I got to hospital and his attempts to say "NC is fine, just can't come to the phone right now" didn't work very well. He then switched his mobile off and the hospital were great at fobbing them off for the next 24 hours. He switched the phone on again to text people that dc had been born safely - it was unfortunate that my dad then called just as baby stopped breathing and was being resusitated and MrNC answered because he'd just returned to me and hadn't realised what was happening. Luckily dc was fine and as we were kept in for a few days had plenty of time to explain to my very apologetic dad (who then turned up with no warning - luckily I'd at least put a T-shirt on!)

I didn;t tell anyone apart from DH. Just rang people when DS was birn. But it was a very quick labour and was middle fo the night, started at 11.30pm, DS born at 6.30am the next day. He was2 weeks early, so I hadn't had any "When's he coming out then...." daily calls from my mum, like my sister (2 weeks late with DN) did. I might have caved in if I had.