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DH administering medication unnecessarily AIBU?

23 replies

Clareyfairy24 · 20/01/2017 12:49

So, last night I went to Pilates (my weekly 2 hours to myself), was dreading it as DS is breastfed and has started rejecting the bottle, DH left to settle him for bed. I get home and DS is flat out. He refused the bottle apparently, got into a right state, and passed out. Anyway, didn't stir at all when I went to bed which he normally wakes for a dream feed and every 2-3 hours after. DS slept through to 5.30am!!! I was beside myself with happiness, hoping it not just a one off. Called DH at lunchtime today, chatting about actually sleeping last night and DH confesses he gave DS calpol because he was 'stressing'. Am fuming, I feel that giving him medicine for that reason unnecessary and also now feel totally deflated as likely good is that's why he slept so well- AIBU?

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Sweets101 · 20/01/2017 12:51

Calpol doesn't make DC drowsy.

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ReturnoftheWhack · 20/01/2017 12:51

Calpol is non drowsy, it would not have made a difference.

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PacificDogwod · 20/01/2017 12:52

If, IF, it was the Calpol that helped him sleep, it is likely he was in pain (?teething) or had fever beforehand.
He may also have slept better because somebody else settled him.
Calpol is plain Paracetamol, not a sedative of any kind.

What age is he?

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Wolfiefan · 20/01/2017 12:52

Did he think the "stressing" was because of pain?
I don't give meds for anything other than pain or fever. Cal pol doesn't make them drowsy though. More likely he was tired out after getting so upset.

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runningLou · 20/01/2017 12:53

Calpol doesn't sedate babies. It shouldn't affect his sleep patterns, so if DS slept better with it, it suggests it might have helped relieve some pain that was bothering him before? How old is he? Is he teething?
DH shouldn't see it as a remedy for stress though ... it's for pain and/or high temp.
Get DH to do bedtime again tonight without Calpol and see what happens! Maybe it's DH settling him without the option of BF that helps him sleep?

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DidILeaveTheGasOn · 20/01/2017 12:53

Calpol has always made my kids sleep. I think more study is needed into the effects of paracetamol. Anyway, that aside, you are not being unreasonable.

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Hassled · 20/01/2017 12:53

I can see why you're cross - I don't agree with giving paracetamol etc for no reason, although equally no harm is going to come from the odd dose. But having said that - the Calpol wouldn't have been what made him sleep; it doesn't have that effect. He was probably exhausted from the state he got into before the Calpol, IYSWIM. Unless your DH has a history of this don't be too mad at him - he was probably just panicking because he couldn't get him to calm down.

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LTBforGin · 20/01/2017 12:54

Calpol isn't a sedative in any way.

He could have a bit of a virus or just incredibly exhausted from crying which is why he's slept so long.

I hope you didn't go off at your dh. He did what he thought was right

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ReturnoftheWhack · 20/01/2017 12:54

I agree with Pacific, maybe he was in pain? Sounds like it had the desired effect? Or maybe it was the change in routine of you not being there?

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Mouthfulofquiz · 20/01/2017 12:55

I wouldn't worry about this at all. He was probably in pain, fussing and needed it. Your DP took the decision as his parent and sounds like you should be glad of the full night's sleep!
Paracetamol is non drowsy. I thought you were going to say he'd given him chlorphenamine for no reason!

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UnoriginalNN · 20/01/2017 12:55

It's pretty harmless, though obviously not the answer to everytime a baby screams. Maybe he needed it, maybe he's teething.

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ReturnoftheWhack · 20/01/2017 13:00

Also, how would you have calmed if you were there? The obvious answer would be too offer him the breast, your DH can't do that. It's incredibly stressful to try and calm a baby that you can't feed, and depending on how young your DS is the normal routine before bed is to offer some milk, either by breast or by bottle - your husband couldn't do either of these things - not sure what you were expecting him to do really?

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JigglyTuff · 20/01/2017 13:03

If calpil makes babies sleep better, its probably because they're not in pain so can get to sleep.

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PatriciaHolm · 20/01/2017 13:04

Assuming he doesn't routinely offer it as soon as a child is cranky, I can't see the problem. As a PP said, he didn't have the one thing he knew your child wanted - your breasts - and if the child was absolutely beside himself, maybe he couldn't see any other way through.

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PacificDogwod · 20/01/2017 13:11

Here's another thought: maybe your DS and DH would benefit from doing bedtimes together more often? More father/baby bonding, both of them learning from each other what works for them, your DH really getting in to that parenting lark?

Your DS's age obviously would affect how well this might work (or whether it would be appropriate).

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Cakescakescakes · 20/01/2017 13:15

Calpol categorically doesn't sedate children. It WILL help them sleep if there is a reason keeping them awake such as teething pain, sore throats etc.

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Cakescakescakes · 20/01/2017 13:16

And to be honest if my babies / children were fussing for a prolonged period of time, refusing feeds etc the. I always tried calpol as a last resort. They can't verbalise their pain so once everything else was ruled out I felt it was reasonable to try that.

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reallyanotherone · 20/01/2017 13:18

I think more study is needed into the effects of paracetamol

Have you any idea how much research has been done on paracetamol?

Shit loads. Side effects, overdose, pain relief, everything. Drugs aren't even made available without prescription until the reviewing body is 100% certain we know as much about is as we are going to.

It does not cause drowsiness.

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reallyanotherone · 20/01/2017 13:20

O/p, if the baby was so upset, and your dh tried calpol as a last resort, i wouldn't say he is medicating uneccessarily.

Especially as it worked, which indicates your baby was in pain and needed it.

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littleducks · 20/01/2017 13:22

He probably cried and tired himself out. Possibly giving himself a headache which calpol helped with? Probably settled bit with calpol as liked sugary taste mine all loved flavour.

I wouldn't have used it in those circumstances but sometimes you have to try different things to see what works when baby crying.

Why did he keep it secret from you til morning? What if you had given more calpol in middle of night?

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Clareyfairy24 · 20/01/2017 13:31

DH said he was stressing because he wouldn't take the bottle. Didn't go off one just felt a bit disappointed. Take everyone's points thanks x

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Clareyfairy24 · 20/01/2017 13:32

Nah he would have 'fessed up if I tried to give calpol in the night lol

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LTBforGin · 20/01/2017 13:34

He could well have been teething. You'll need to discuss a plan for trying to get baby on a bottle and both stick to it if the bottles the way forward for you all

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