*Sanity check* what do you do with your 18-month old?

[ApplesTheHare]

Hi all

How much/what kinds of activities do those of you with 18-month-old DCs do in a day? I've been resisting the urge to only visit friends and 'safe zones' like soft play due to DDs tantrums but am wondering if it's time to give in?

Took DD to the vet with me and DDog today and she had several screaming fits, and threw herself on the floor repeatedly while we were waiting and in with the vet. Tried all the usual distraction techniques and telling her she was being silly and would scare the pets, with limited success. Luckily I've got along fuse, but I do feel bad for all the innocent bystanders!

[DontBuyANewMumCashmere]

Watching with interest.

Btw I've had a poorly dog for about a year and have to take him regularly to the vet. DD goes in a carrier for this - would yours? Saves the floor tantrums and might be calmer if she's closer/touching you?

[anotherBadAvatar]

hmm. watching too.

With DD (17m) we -

go to shops (I give her something to carry round thats unbreakable, she seems to like the responsibility)
go to park
walk dog
Go for coffee & cakes
go to library
play at friend's house
occasional toddler group

at home -
play with bubbles
read books
do "painting" - (she sits in highchair with crayons while mummy drinks tea)
play outside digging
build things and knock them over
helps me tidy (i give her dustpan and brush while I hoover)
watch CBeebies
struggling to think what else we do!

For us the key to prevent tantrums is Snacks. Lots. Of Snacks.

[FATEdestiny]

Hello Apples

I don't think I'd brave taking my DD to the vets alone. That said, she has been with us to the vets twice recently. But went with both me and DH - so one adult with the puppy and the other with the toddler. DD really enjoyed it - met two big dogs, a cat and a rabbit.

Are you talking things to do outside of home?

In a similar vain to above, DD has been to Pets at Home twice - they have rabbits, GP, hamsters etc to look at, and aquariums. Once I took her on my own in a pushchair. We looked at/ talked about everything and she was great. DH took her on his own this weekend without the pushchair. She had a lying on the floor and refusing to move moment when being moved away from the rabbits. So pushchair is the way to go for now (since the trip was functional for shopping, not just for looking at animals).

There are also places like:
Play parks (with swings and slides etc)
Green parks (as in big open spaces with a football or whatever)
Parent & Toddler groups
Library
Basic household tasks like going shopping (not just grocery shopping)

Depending on where you live, there might be museums to visit? I live near an IKEA store and we could spend a good hour playing in their children's department and then on the play equipment outside (if the weather is OK).

[FATEdestiny]

For us the key to prevent tantrums is Snacks

Oh yes.

If I anticipate I might have tantrum issues then I take a drink and a pot of ready cut-up fruit with me.

But for a quick shopping trip, I might not have these with me. I therefore have half a packet of biscuits stashed permanently in the bottom of my handbag for emergency situations.

Now DD is getting older, a pack of felt tips and a pad of paper in my handbag is also helpful.

[lornathewizzard]

Me and 20mo DD don't do that much outside the house, but if I was taking her for example for one of my docs / midwife appt, I would always try and take the pushchair. She will prob whinge a little but she would be running riot otherwise. And snacks will always distract her!
Other than that, we do soft play/ play date with a friend once a week, lunch out every 2 weeks probably with friends. Over and above that it is just trips to the supermarket or walks round the local area (no park within walking distance but nice quiet pavements).

[lornathewizzard]

We should probably do more, but we try to get out most days even if it's just to Asda or round the block. When we're in the house we just potter about with Disney Jr on in the background!

[skankingpiglet]

DD is 22mo, but I do the same stuff with her now as at 18mo.
We go to the park, soft play, playgroups, and swimming lessons as activities for her out of the house. At home I give a lot of time to free play and reading books together, but we also 'make marks' with crayons, felt tips, pencils, and if I'm feeling brave, paint. We bake occasionally, watch cartoons for a bit, and play out in the garden when the weather allows.

However I also take her along for a variety of errands. This could be a trip around the shops, but as I'm expecting DC2 there have been a lot of appointments too recently. YY to snacks (and small toys/books) for these sorts of outings. If it's something you particularly need to keep them quiet for, choose favourite or 'naughty' snacks they usually wouldn't get. I bought DD an almond croissant for my hospital appointment last week, which in combination with an apple (the best for longevity, it takes ages to eat with a toddler-sized mouth) and a book got her through an hours worth of me sitting and talking to the Midwife. I also sometimes bribe her with the promise of a trip to the park on the way home (or a bit of Peppa when we get in). The pushchair is your friend for appointments. They might throw a strop initially but a toy or snack chucked in their direction will usually help them get over it. Much much better for the stress levels to have them contained.

When they do throw a strop, I find taking DD outside/away until she calms down works wonders. Definitely don't let it stop you taking your DD out, they need to learn how to behave in different situations and most people are pretty understanding. Either that or ignore if it's not too bad, or not a place others really care.

[squizita]

Mine gets 'hangry' (hungry + angry) too! I always have breadsticks and raisins hidden somewhere in my bag.

Places we go:
-shop (in trolley, gets to hold things and 'guard' them for mummy)
-parks and playgroups
-cafes/pubs with kid friendly areas/lots of kids
-garden centre fish displays
-library
-friends (as in my friends and hers)
-nursery (well, when I'm at work but I take her!)
-crappy local attractions (petting "zoo" with some bunnies, splash playground, mini train ride in a park etc nothing expensive)
-nature reserve to goggle at trees/birds/grab up sticks

I do craft, playing ball, scribbling, dress up in adult clothes, imaginative play (she pretends to be an adult), songs and action games, 'rough play' etc at home.

[ApplesTheHare]

Thanks everyone. Really interesting to hear what you all get up to in a typical day. I only have DD for 1 day during the working week so there are inevitably lots of chores to fit in along with fun activities like walking the dog, visiting the park and soft play. This morning was a bit much with a trip to the vet and the doctor, having the house valued plus all the usual washing/tidying/cleaning. DD was obviously hacked off and acting up because she was bored with waiting/being ignored. She's a total pushchair refuser unless she's knackered as well, so that's not always an option. Snacks work really well but she'll eat until she's sick if given the choice so I'm loathe to let her stuff her face the whole time we're somewhere she can't be released to run (wild)

Waves to FATE Hi! Do we have another postnatal group? I've got a bit lost with all my threads

[Binglesplodge]

Another with an 18 month old coming to pinch some ideas and perhaps offer a couple if they're any help...

I find the key is to keep him really busy. It's exhausting but I find his patience is a lot shorter at home than out and about. Definitely playing in the garden, a trip to the park, or a long welly walk on any day when the weather isn't horrendous. Fresh air is a definite winner and there's a lot to look at outside.

I am at home 3 days a week so I like to have some planned activity on each day: a toddler group, a swimming class, or a plan to meet friends/kids for lunch or soft play.

In general, whole days at home without some sort of plan seem to stretch out endlessly and contain way too much of the word "no".

I had great luck today getting him to play with buttons and tubs and bowls but the novelty factor might make it a very occasional activity. I can't be picking up buttons from the floor on a regular basis!

Watching out for naps is the other key to a good day in our house. Sometimes he wants one, sometimes two. He gets to decide: he's far happier on enough sleep, even if it does trap me at home when I'd rather be out or getting noisy jobs done.

Hope this thread fills with helpful hints! (ps I think the postnatal thread has petered out but it would be lovely to start up a new one and see how everyone's navigating this bit...)

[polkadotdelight]

The postnatal thread is still going, I recognise a few names, come back!

Im at work full time so I probably try to squeeze too much into our days together but DS loves to be outside. Its either playing on the scuttle bug or me pushing him on the swings (an hour is my record!). Garden centres and farm shops are good for us.

[duckyisback]

Place marking for ideas!

Ds is 16mo and gets so bored so easily. He is also a world class tantrumer

[FATEdestiny]

September 2014 Postnatal Chat thread is still going strong. Lovely and friendly for anyone who wants to join. We have some babies from August and October on there too. Everyone is welcome