YES it honestly does get better. LOADS LOADS better. To be truthful I have felt exactly like this both times with our babies. Didn't enjoy it at all. It didn't help that they were both extremely cranky and restless babies. It knocked my confidence straight away. I remember sobbing through exhaustion and just wondering why the hell we ever wanted a baby both times . It is hard work, especially if your baby has colic.
Yes your baby WILL sleep longer one day, YES she absolutely will settle and stop crying every time you have a shower! Even though it seems to last forever. For me the first year is just such hard work but also monotonous and drudgery. I was also riddled with anxiety. I worried they'd never settle, never sleep, worried I was doing it wrong, worried it was my fault they cried, worried they wouldn't develop properly. You name it, I worried about it!
It will get better. If you have a decent health visitor, have a chat with her about how you're feeling, or go and see your GP. Main thing is not to put a front on like everything's fine when inside you're crumbling. I am speaking from bitter experience here! first time round, I kept smiling and made everyone believe I was fine and loving motherhood when in fact I wanted to cry every day and DS1 cried relentlessly as a baby. I became depressed and practically a hermit! Second time round I was far more honest, told my friends how hard DS1 had been and how hard I was finding it with 2. I got a lot more support and I think that saved me.
Try to get out as much as possible. Even if the baby screams or you think you look shocking, fresh air and a change of scenery is good for you and your baby.
Agree with above comment, don't set a date of 12 weeks or 6 months etc when it'll magically get better and suddenly you'll love it and your baby will sleep through etc. For me it was a gradual thing. Basically them just growing up!
Anyway, just to give you some perspective, my DS's are now 6 and 2 years old, they are walking, talking, funny, clever, interesting little people who make me laugh and fill the house with love and fill my heart with pride every day. I am still not a huge fan of babies, but children are amazing!
Hang in there xxx