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DS's Grandad seriously ill - COPD. What to do?

(3 Posts)
SomePeopleSayImBonkers Sat 15-Sep-12 18:15:51

Hiya.

Will try to keep this brief but happy to give extra info when needed.

My 11 yr old has a stepgrandfather who is seriously ill with COPD. He recently went to a hospital appointment regarding a lung transplant. He told the Drs that he quit smoking 6 months ago (although the reality is that he quit a week ago) and they said he has approx 5 years left to live without the transplant, 8 with. He's decided not to go for the transplant.

So, now we're got lots of questions and challenging times ahead for all of us. My main concern at the moment is the grandfather (my stepfather-in-law) and his wife (my mother-in-law). How we can support them, what kind of support they need through occupational health, etc.

However, DS is very close to his grandad. He lived with his grandparents for a substantial amount of time and I can't imagine how he is going to cope when he learns the news. What should we do? Should we tell him at some point?? At the moment, I'm thinking of reminding DS that grandad is poorly (DS knows this, but not that he is seriously ill) and if any occasion comes up to talk about dying and death, to use that....but not relating it to grandad.

The other issue is that DS's uncle (grandad's youngest son) doesn't know. He is 18 and Autistic. Obviously, he is very close to Dad and constantly worries about him. He knows his Dad is ill but hasn't been told how seriously. This news will devastate him. I'm concerned on what is the best way to support him too.

This is just all so horrible. I have so many questions and just don't know where to start. I'm sorry about rambling. Thanks for reading

SimLondon Tue 20-Nov-12 23:27:28

COPD is also known as emphysema and chronic bronchitus - i wonder if the different names for it confuses things.

The worst thing about copd is chest infections, AVOID AT ALL COSTS.

My grandfather lived for many years with copd, stopping smoking and avoiding chest infections is key. If you smoke then having 'years' is probably out of the question, in fact i believe that they refuse to give oxygen therapy at home to those that smoke.

tiredofwaitingforitalltochange Mon 31-Dec-12 01:09:59

I know this is an old thread, but Sim I thought I'd let you know that the reason they won't give oxygen therapy at home to people who smoke isn't because they are denying treatment to people with destructive habits. It's because the oxygen can explode if it is ignited. It's just too dangerous if anyone smokes in the house, not just the patient.

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