emergency nannies/doulas - any suggestions?

[Carriel]

A friend gave birth to her third child two weeks ago( a 10lb 3oz boy!) by c section. She already has twin boys aged three and her husband is due back at work on Monday. He is very keen to sort out some cover for the next six weeks or so till she's fully recovered from the c section. The boys are at nursery three days a week, but still need tea, bath etc and she also needs some tlc. What do you think doula or nanny? and any ideas where to find them at short notice?
thanks

[suedonim]

I've never employed either but I think the first thing to consider would be in which area your friend wants the most help. Is it mainly to look after the twins or to look after her and the new baby? From our very own Pupuce's posts, I would think a doula is more concerned with the mum and baby, while a nanny might be more childcare oriented. Just my guess, I could be completely wrong! A search on 'nannies' in Google brings up lots of agencies, many of which seem to have staff immediately available.

[bells2]

If you are looking for a Nanny at short notice, we found Top Notch Nannies in South Kensington to be the best (they were actually the only one contacted on the Friday able to produce someone for interview the same day and starting Monday). Most of the major agencies do do temporary nannies but require a bit of notice. Cost for a live out five day week is around £350 + £50-£80 a week for the agency.

[LucieB]

I have been told that Tinies are very good and provide emergency nannies....

[pupuce]

I think doula.... it's better (IMO) as it will do all that toddler stuff and do what MUM wants + you get an experienced mum !!!
To get a doula.... find one on www.doula.org.uk
Saves from spending at least £250 to a nanny agency BEFORE paying for the nanny !
And all the Doula UK doulas have signed a code of practice too!

I have been working for mums with toddlers and I did all sorts: cooking, baths, football with 5yo (yes!), walking baby, sorting shopping, tidying up...

Contact me off line if you want a recommendation

[pupuce]

And doulas in London generally charge £15/hour -FAR cheaper than nannies !

[bells2]

£350 a week is for a 50 hour week for a temp Nanny (+ the agency's fee which for Top Notch is £50 + VAT per week). So that works out at £8 an hour inlcuding the fee. If you want someone just for a few hours a day then perhaps a doula would be cheaper but if you want blanket coverage, I would have thought a Nanny is still a good option. Incidentally, there was an article in the paper yesterday wbout www.nightnannies.com. For £85 or so they will come in from 9pm - 7am which sounds like pretty good value, especially compared to a maternity nurse.

[pupuce]

Bells - that IS what I meant about cheaper.... not per hour but if you don't want all day coverage !
I work with families who have often had nannies or maternity nurses and for their subsequent birth they don't want such "invasive" presence and often find another mum (more mature woman) a better solution... not for everyone and I know not for everyone's purse either

[morocco]

following on from pupuce's last suggestion, perhaps 'another mum' would work out OK. I mean not someone qualified (doula or midwife) but someone local just looking for a few hours work. That would be even cheaper. As your friend would be in the house with her boys she might feel comfortable with someone without formal experience looking after the kids, cooking a few meals, doing a bit of cleaning etc.

[aloha]

Not a nanny, surely, she'll only look after the boys or baby and not touch the house, which is what got me down after ds was born. I got my cleaner then with really helped. Maybe a mother's help/doula person?

[anto]

I had a postnatal doula after I had my second child by c-section and she was fantastic. I purposely chose to have a doula rather than a maternity nurse as most mn's I have met are incredibly precious about doing anything apart from looking after the newborn and certainly won't tidy up your house or look after your toddler.

Nanny would look after the older kids & get their food & do their washing but wouldn't do any housework. And not all nannies have newborn experience so you'd have to look for the right one.

My doula came 8-12am every day. She made/changed beds, put on the washing, hung up the washing, did the ironing, swept the floors, loaded/emptied the dishwasher, made me tea, played with toddler, took toddler & baby to park while I slept, looked after baby while I went out, looked after both while I went to dentist etc etc etc. She also provided a sympathetic ear and had loads of experience with newborns. I didn't need that much reassurance about the baby as it was my second but how I wish I had had her first time round when I was a neurotic nutter with low-level PND.

She came for 6 weeks...ended up staying 10...I was gutted when we had to say goodbye. I would recommend a doula to anyone. It just got me through those hard early days with a newborn - she was great company, the house wasn't descending into total chaos, and gave my days a sense of routine - even when I'd had a shocking night at least I knew there'd be a friendly adult face at 8am (my husband goes to work at 6am so I wanted her to come early).

I found her on the website Pupuce recommended.

[anto]

My doula cost £15 per hour but the joy of having a doula is that you can be flexible about how often you have them/the hours they do. For example she started off doing 4hrs a day 5 days a week then soon went down to 3 days a week and then down to 3hrs 3days a week. You wouldn't have that flexibility with a maternity nurse.

The night nannies sounds great but I've looked into it and you have to pay £177 joining fee (don't know if that includes VAT) and then pay £15 to the agency every night you have the nanny and then pay the nanny directly depending on how long they work for.

[anto]

I had a postnatal doula after I had my second child by c-section and she was fantastic. I purposely chose to have a doula rather than a maternity nurse as most mn's I have met are incredibly precious about doing anything apart from looking after the newborn and certainly won't tidy up your house or look after your toddler.

Nanny would look after the older kids & get their food & do their washing but wouldn't do any housework. And not all nannies have newborn experience so you'd have to look for the right one.

My doula came 8-12am every day. She made/changed beds, put on the washing, hung up the washing, did the ironing, swept the floors, loaded/emptied the dishwasher, made me tea, played with toddler, took toddler & baby to park while I slept, looked after baby while I went out, looked after both while I went to dentist etc etc etc. She also provided a sympathetic ear and had loads of experience with newborns. I didn't need that much reassurance about the baby as it was my second but how I wish I had had her first time round when I was a neurotic nutter with low-level PND.

She came for 6 weeks...ended up staying 10...I was gutted when we had to say goodbye. I would recommend a doula to anyone. It just got me through those hard early days with a newborn - she was great company, the house wasn't descending into total chaos, and gave my days a sense of routine - even when I'd had a shocking night at least I knew there'd be a friendly adult face at 8am (my husband goes to work at 6am so I wanted her to come early).

I found her on the website Pupuce recommended.

[pupuce]

Good to hear your excellent experience Anto - glad you found the right one for you!

[miriamw]

After my c/s (12 weeks ago) I used both a doula and a temp part-time nanny (not at the same time I should add!), as ds1 was at nursery for part of the time, and my main concern was not being able to lift him.

I had the advantage of being able to interview before the birth, but as the nanny knew the circumstances I must say I didn't find that she drew narrow lines at all. She did all of our ironing and helped prepare the evening meal. She also popped to the shops etc. And childcare of course! Doula did all of above, but was fairly pro-active, so walked into the house and emptied the dishwasher, put on the laundry and started ds's tea almost before saying hello!

Both worked well, though the hourly rates were quite different - £8 for the nanny, £15 for the doula. The nanny agency also charged £10 per day for the nanny (or £40 per week if you used her 5 days). However if you're looking for someone at short notice you might have to take what you can get IYSWIM. If you're looking for a few hours a day then go for a doula, but if you need more than 4 hours you may as well go for a nanny cost-wise.