Still thanking the heavens I started this thread now. I feel alot calmer that the night I wrote the first post. Mind you goodness knows what I will be like the night before or the day she goes in, but will deal with that then.

It was the local BBC news who were saying that survial rates in the UK were terrible, through late diagnosis etc.. Thats why I freaked out, then came the researching online (big mistake).

Thankyou for sharing all your positive stories it really has helped over the last couple of days.

Thanks for sharing that Abetadad. I remember thinking at the time of my mum's diagnosis that she would definitely not survive as all I knew about ovarian cancer was that it was dubbed ' the silent killer. '

I now know that that is not the case, but obviously, like you say, it depends on a reasonably early diagnosis.

shineoncrazydiamond/MegSophandEmma

I hope the story of my DW will give you lots of reassurance. She survived and has now been in remission 10 years and had two children since.

My wife was diagnosed at a mid stage but reasonably advanced state with hundreds of ovarian cancer tumour plaques seeding all over her abdominal organs and massive tumours on both ovaries. She was diagnosed by a complete fluke as we had been TTC and could not figure out why we could not conceive. She had aggresive surgery to remove the plaques and 2 rounds of chemo. She was quite ill and her reproductive system had shut down because of the cancer.

The consultants were very pesimistic. There is no doubt they expected her to die. I mentally planned my wife's funeral. I will not deny it was the most frightening thing I (and DW) have ever lived through. I really do know how you both feel. But it all came out well even though it seemed the blackest of nights and the prognosis was awful.

The '5 year survival rate' is the percentage of people that survive at least 5 years after the initial diagnosis. The truth is that some survival rates look truely awful because the patients in those stages are already very very ill. Anyone caught early or even at a mid stage like DW has a very high probability of surviving - especially as treatment continues to advance all the time.

Looking at raw survival rates can be very misleading indeed. Each case is very unique. Ovarian cancer tumours all grow at different rates, some are more or less invasive, some are more or less responsive to chemotherapy.

Hope it goes well, MS&E. I can also tell you that she could be OK, because my Mum had a hysterectomy five years ago (aged 74) with similar symptoms. Contrary to our expectations, no cancer was found. The problem had been caused by cysts and fibroids, one of which was very large indeed.

I have to say that, due to her age and other complications, her recovery was a difficult time. Your Mum will need to guard against infections, and constipation (which sounds benign enough but can be extremely painful) can be a problem, especially if she gets morphine for the pain. But we got through all those things, in the knowledge that her life wasn't in danger . It's natural to worry but I hope that your Mum's fears - and your own - will soon be shown to have been unfounded.

I was also confused at first regarding talk of ' 5 year survival rates.'

I needed it explaining to me that it didn't mean that the day after the 5 years were up you dropped down dead.

It is true what ABETADAD says- there are many nuances and stages and grades.

Can I ask ABETADAD - what stage was your wife's at? It was obviously caught early and contained.

MegSophandEmma when i first went to my doctor,he felt that i had a tumour and myself and my dd were in the position you are in now,i was in hospital within two weeks, and hey presto was a large fibroid attached to ovaries and womb !we were both petrified and thought the worst,but luckily it turned out fine as i have already told you.It is scary but is something your mum has to have done for now, im sure they will look after her just fine.As i said previously,I had no pain when i awoke,but did have a morphine drip for the first 24 hrs,but even when that was taken out i still had no pain at all.the worst thing i had after the op was i kept being sick so had to have daily injections for that,but that was purely the anesthetics. when i got home each day i had to walk a little bit for example on day one to my neighbours front gate, and gradually increase the distance.I used to think i was never going to be upright again and envied people who were walking normally ,but of course I was just feeling sorry for myself and got back to normal very soon.

ShineOn, My mum did that yesterday (bless her) She called the Macmillan helpline. It's a crazy, worrying time. Just glad you are all here, as I want to be strong and not put anymore of my worries onto her.

ABetaDad, I am usually the first to tell people not to google as it is a surefire way of scaring the crap out you, but now this is here it's so hard not to. I research many random things out of habit online, but I vow that I won't look at anything else. Especially not until we know for sure what is going on.

MegSophandEmma - please be very careful when looking at survival rate data. It is terribly easy to convince yourself of awful outcomes.

"Last night I was looking for statistics on ovarian cancer survival rates at different stages and alsorts, getting myself into a right tiz arghhh."

I did that too and especially if you look at US websites they have very detailed survival rate data and statistics. I spent 48 hours of solid searching and analysing that data and convinced myself (and after a lot of talking to DW) to pick up the phone and ask the consultant to hold the hysterectomy and get a second opinion. The reason being that I was not convinced of the accuracy of the diagnosis or the potential risk DW faced. It was worth waiting a few weeks to get a real expert to take a look at the samples.

That US data has horrificly low survival rates for some types of ovarian cancer and extremely high rates for other types.

Classfying ovarian cancer types is an extremely uncertain science as we eventually discovered. The spread of possible outcomes is huge even within each ovarian cancer type as it is highly dependent on individual case circumstances. Also DO remember your Mum has not even been diagnosed properly yet.

I know it is difficult not to look and of course you are very worried but do try not to do too much internet searching until you know more.

All the best and fingers crossed it is all a false alarm. It most often is.

I went one better that just googling the survival rates! I rang one of the cancer bacup nurses and demanded to know how likely it was that she would die, and if so, when! They must have thought I was completely barking... I just became obsessed with wanting to know the worst case scenario and then thinking I would then at least know and be able to prepare myself.

Looking back, it all seems a little mad now, but at the time I was desperate.

Have to say though, there is every chance in the world that your mum has fibroids and scar tissue. They found out when my mum had the op that she had terrible adhesions from endemetriosis- she didn't even know that she had suffered from that! And an ovarian cyst in very unlikely to be cancerous anyway- so keep these thoughts in mind!

I had a radical hysterectomy and the recovery really wasn't that bad. I was mobile within a 3 days, discharged on day 6 post op and then just pottered about at home. I got very tired for the first week or so but after that I was just building up my energy.

DH had 4 weeks off work but that was because I had 3 and 15 month old ds's to look after. I was lifting ds2 by the 5th week and on my own with them from week 6.

Mine was done because of cervical cancer and they did a biopsy on the tissue they removed to check it hadn't spread.

I really hope your mums ok and it doesn't turn out to be anything sinister.

ShineOn, my mum after having her thyroid removed and all looked well, had to have some kind of scan every year. Then once she was clear for five years, she moved onto a scan once every five years. She was made to drink something which would detect anything odd. She still has these now. Not sure if it is the same scan ABetaDad has talked about though as it was a completly different area.

Guadalupe, so sorry I never saw anyoneelses posts lastnight, just carried on the message I started before my mum came round, then headed off to bed. Very glad you are ok now. Thanks for sharing your reasuring story.

Mummylin, to you also. Thanks for providing me with another reasurring post with a poitive outcome. Glad you are ok.

Wow, aBETAdad what an informative post. Thankyou. It just goes to show that cancer doesn't always end up beating you. Should be aware of this as my mum had thyroid cancer when she was 32 and has been fine in that department since) So chuffed that you and your DW went onto have children also and thank heavens the op was cancelled!!

Afternoon.

Have just bought the book wonderstuff. Cheers for the link. I just hope she will read it, Blood and Stone are the words I use to describe the joys of getting my mother to read lol...

Shineon It really is good to have another talk about this with who has been there. Still scared and I know it will get worse until this whole thing is over with. Oh and wanting to know thw facts is exactly want I am like now. Although I have a tendency to predict the future outcome, already certain that it's going to be a bad outcome, but then I read the posts again on here, which bring me back to having a realistic vision (basically that I know nada lol). Last night I was looking for statistics on ovarian cancer survival rates at different stages and alsorts, getting myself into a right tiz arghhh. Thanks for your email address and your support

Sorry ignore last post which was a US version here is UK one I think my mum had.

Hi- you can email me direct at lilfoxyears at yahoo.co.uk anytime you like. I have been where you are now and I have been through the whole thing so, although scary and horrible, you do come out the other end. I know how you are feeling. I would have loved someone who had been through it to talk to last year. My friends were fantastic, but I wanted FACTS and I became obsessed with wanting to know exactly what would happen, which, of course, is impossible to predict.( He he, you'd think it was ME who'd been ill, not my Mother!!! )

Keep me posted- and chin up!

Remembered last night my mum had this book which she found reasurring.

Your all absolute angels and have calmed me somewhat. Sorry it has taken ages to respond, my mum popped round for a cuppa and chat. I mentioned someof the things that have been mentioned on the thread and I'm hoping she is reasured slightly, like I have been.

ShineOn so sorry this post brought back the awful memories of what happened with your mother I am glad she and you got through that rough period. It really has helped to ease my mind somewhat, if that is any consilation. Vey grateful and I am sure I will be looking to talk more as the time for my mums op draws nearer, if the offer still stands. Cheers.

Martha Will the hospital provide to with strong painkillers after? maybe a morphine drip for a week or something? I do wish you the speediest of recoveries. Aswell as loveones around to spoil you rotten whilst you are recovering

Off to my bed now.

She has her next check up in September.. she is going to mention it then. I am a terrible nag....

That is bonkers!

Maybe you should send your Mum's consultant this link onultrasound.

"Ultrasound imaging, also called ultrasound scanning or sonography, involves exposing part of the body to high-frequency sound waves to produce pictures of the inside of the body. Ultrasound exams do not use ionizing radiation (as used in x-rays).

Just rung my mother to enquire about why she is not getting these scans! Apparently it is because of concerns over radiation...

Hmmm

shineon - I too am gobsmacked.

Your Mum should be getting ultrasound. DW has lived in 3 different places since she was diagosed and every single area has done CA125 and ultrasound as standard. CA125 tests are just not accurate enough on their own.

It is very true, ovarian cancer is not the death sentence it once was. Glad your Mum came through it well but, like you, it hangs over us every single day.

i had a hysterectomy and also had ovaries removed owing to fibroids.I was fine after the op although i did find it difficult to walk for a few days owing to the clips.i was only in hospital from tues [ op wednesday] and they let me home on sunday.I was very tearful but i had been warned about this and this soon pased,i had to stay off work for 12 weeks and my cut was across my stomach on the bikini line.I was in no pain at all.And after a few weeks i felt as good as new. I also had my cervix removed.The actual op is nothing to be scared about,no-one could of been more scared than me ! But it honestly was fine.Good luck to your mum.

ABETADAD- That is reassuring to hear that your wife is cancer free after ten years. My Mum has a check up every 3 months at the moment but her consultant has said that they do not recommend ultrasounds. I was gobsmacked at this as I thought that was how they detectd further problems, but apparently, they prefer to go on blood tests and how the person feels in themselves.

I would be more reassured by an ultrasound, have to say

Hi Meg - you must be really scared, it is horrible news but try not to worry yourself with thinking the worst. I know it's hard.

I had a hysterectomy a year ago aged 30. It was a stage 1 cervical cancer and luckily my surgery was curative. The majority of the women on my ward were much older and having routine operations for fibroids and cysts etc and iirc I think their symptoms were very similar to your mums. Not much else to talk about while lined up in your beds except why we were there!

I was home after two days, was moving around well and felt much better by six weeks and by six months completely back to normal.

Hopefully your mums op will be straightforward and like others have said, there's every chance she will be fine. If you want to ask anything about the op then do.

My Mum had an hysterectomy about 2 years ago after a prolapse. She was tired for a while but now much better. I would say 2 months to make 90% recovery.

DW has had ovarian cancer. Had one ovary removed and was schedule for an hysterectomy but cancelleled with 24 hours to go, then chemotherapy. Then we had 2 DSs. DW has been in remission 10 years but still CA125 tested and ultrasound every 6 months.

I agree with marthasmama - CA125 is the blood test, but biopsy is crucial. Do remember that endometriosis, benign ovarian cysts, pelvic inflammatory disease can also all produce higher levels of the CA-125 antigen. CA125 is not a reliable test on its own though. The symptoms of pain and bloating etc can occur due to all of the above conditions plus fibroids.

I am very sorry you and your Mum are going through this. Hysterectomy (removal uterus plus ovaries) is the standard medical 'belt and braces' response to any risk of ovarian cancer but is equally applicable to other conditions too in women who are past child bearing age.

Hope this helps and if you have other questions please ask.

As for how long to get back to normal after the hysterectomy... My mum was OK after about 6 weeks but her OP was radical surgery- they took her cervix as well, and the cut was diagonal. She was very sore for a few weeks then gradually improved.

No worries Meg. It is my second cyst but this time I am having a laparotomy with a midline incision. Booooo! The incision is through your stomach muscles, so your back and stomach are very weak after the op. It's like a c-section x 10 I think. Having had two c-sections I can honestly say I am not looking forward to it! Again, best of luck for your mum.

OK.. BREATHE!!!

My Mum went to the Doctor last June, just for some usual blood pressure checks. She mentioned that she had a bit of stomach pain on and off ( she had not mentioned this to us..) and the Dr felt her tummy and said he could feel something, so referred her for a scan and blood tests. Two weeks later and the blood tests showed nothing unusual and the scan showed a very large cyst which ' did not look sinister, but consultant recommended a hysterecyomy to be on the safe side. '. Two weeks after that she had a full hysterectomy and the cyst removed. The surgeon said everything looked normal, no sign of cancer, but they would swab the removed organs as they usually do. A further blood test showed no signs of cancer also.

I really thought she was OK and felt relieved that it was 'just a cyst'.. but the results came through a week or so later and showed that the cyst HAD been cancerous and it was a grade 2 Ovarian cancer.

I swear to God I have never been so frightened in my life. I was just so terrified and could not bear the thought I would lose my Mum at the age of 36. Even writing this now makes me well up, so I know how you feel. I really do.

Anyway, the consultant said they THOUGHT the cancer was contained but he recommended 6 chemo session to ' mop up any stray cells.' Her chemo was a fucking hell on earth but finished in January this year. Her hair fell out and she got very sick.

BUT.... She has an all clear now. The cancer had not spread. Her hair has grown back at a remarkable rate. She does walk with a stick now, but this was caused by the carboplatin part of the chemo. She feels fine and I am very hopeful that all is fine.

I tell you this story not to terrify you into thinking your Mum has cancer- there is every chance in the world that she does not. But you asked for someone to tell you that she could be OK. Well,of course she could be OK.. the chances are that she IS ok..

But, if it turns out that it is more problematic, it is not the death sentence that your OP implies. My Mum - and family- took it a day at a time and came through it. I would be lying if I said I never gave it a second thought now- I do- but I have been through it, got through it and so can you and your mum.

In a matter of days she will have the OP and you will be so much clearer on what the issue is. There is every single chance in the world that she will be just fine.

Am here if you need to chat.

My mum had a cyst on her ovaries, she had awful menopause symptoms and huge amounts of bleeding. They monitored it for a few months and when it started growing they did a full hysterectomy.

It took a long time for her to feel well again, about a year until she felt herself, she was off work for about 2 months and was tired alot when she returned. Be prepared for your mum to look awful when she comes round from the operation.

I would try not to worry about the possiblity of cancer if I was you. I know how terribly difficult that is but until you have a diagnosis you don't know what you're up against. There is every chance she will be ok. They told my mum they would remove everything as soon as the cyst grew to be safe. She didn't have cancer but they chose to operate because there was a risk that it could develop.

I hope that all goes well. Will be thinking of you

Thanks Liz&lulu, Apparently after this op you have to learn to walk again?

You sound like a fab daughter L&L. Glad college as finished for the summer, I will be with her as much as she needs as I know my dad and brother will be also. She will be getting spoilt, as she deserves for a change lol.

Marthasmama, I just blew out a huge sigh of relief although and am so sorry you have had/are going through this also.

I had a look earlier on the cancerbackup website and they too said that a biopsy should have been taken. I mentioned this to my mum and she said well they didn't and everything will be looked at once it's all removed. Was pretty angry when I read it to be honest.

I really hope all goes well with your op and you are up and about feeling great, ASAP.

Thanks again for your messages and support. Not usually the emotional type but blimey...

MY MUM WAS HOLED UP IN THE BEDROOM FOR AROUND A WEEK sorry about caps, i had to help her get out of bed and sit her in a comfy chair just to get her out of the bed and feeling more normal.
she was about 3 weeks till she felt strong enough to walk around town and drive anywhere, but months til lshe could carry any shopping or anything heavy

Thanks again for the replies

She kept saying JKS that she was concerned about the aftercare from the op, but now I think it was away of getting some of this fear of cancer that she's been hiding.

Could you tell me please how long was it before your mothers got back to normal after the op?

The symptoms of an ovarian cyst are very similar to those of ovarian cancer. The test you are referring to is probably a CA125 test and if the results were fine than that is good news. If it is any consolation, I am due to have an operation to remove a very large ovarian cyst in two weeks so I sort of know what you're going through. I am surprised they didn't take a biopsy when she had the laparoscopy as that would have told them so much more than the blood test. It's important to remember that most ovarian cysts are harmless. I know it's hard not to worry, but if the blood test was fine, then take comfort from that. I think that it is an accurate indicator in around 75% of cases of ovarian cancer, so those are good odds. I hope everything goes well for your mum.

Well, my mum didn't have the same symptoms but did have a hysterectomy and swore it's the best thing she ever did.

She had a womb prolapse (i think) and had had heavy periods and stuff that she never really told me about.

she was fine and sodding driving/lifting roasts out of ovens/etc. when she shouldn't have been cos i was a sleepyhead teenager.

best of luck to your mum

dont be hard on yourself, it mus be very scary for you, my mums stomach was swollen, but she is a larger lady so it was only really noticable to her, this was down to the amount of fibroids she had.

i do hope she is ok

Obviously very grateful for you reading lol

Thankyou so much for your response L&L, tis much appreciated.

Ther is concern with regards to the ovary, as it is growing rapidly. The blood test she had was fine. I think this is a test to see if some levels of some kind of chemical has risen (which could indicate cancer)

She has been complaining of a swollon stomach and I have to say she now looks 4/5 months PG. She is unable to eat much due to stomach pain. It was these sypmtoms that caused something inside to stir, when I saw the symptoms of ovarian cancer mentioned this evening.

I can't belive how scared I am for her and selfishly myself too. She's not just my mum but my bestfriend The only person I have ever belived to have loved me completely, despite the horrendous life she has had. Oh friggin hell I can't stop cryin and dd keeps popping downstairs.

Sorry for wittering on, but thanks for reading.

Thankyou again for reading.

i am sure she will be fine
my mum had a hysterectomy last year, she had massive fibriods and her bladder had fused to her womb, they operation should have took 3/4 of ohur and it was 2 and a half hour,s but she was fine after.
it took a long while for her to recover enough to feel normal, i am talking months before she felt good, but now wouldnt look back, she is so so glad she had it done.

have the docs said anything about cancer? it is probably best if they whip it all away and get it out

I am so scared this is going to be something sinister.

She has kept her fears hidden from myself and my brother. I saw something this evening about ovarian cancer. It was laying out the symproms etc.. and I called my mother to ask exactly what the doctor had told her during her pre op appointment. She eventually said she is scared it's Ovarian cancer. My mother had thyroid cancer at the age of 32 and she said she never doubted that she would okay, but she just said this evening she has a bad feeling.

The tests she has had so far are; Blood test, scan (a mass in her womb and ovaries were found, as well as a swollen fallopian tube). She then had some key hole surgery where a camera was inserted to have a look about. Following this she was informed that she had a huge cyst on her ovary and polps and fibroids all over the inside and outside of her womb.

So she is having her hysterectomy in eleven days and I am so f**king scared I'm 29 fgs but I don't think I can be without my mum. Please tell me she could be ok someone please.