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ARGH fuckity fucking fuck. fucking bollox

(79 Posts)
PavlovtheCat Sat 26-Jan-13 08:30:22

I am laying on the sofa in agony. My back has 'gone' having stupidly decided to tidy the house in order for a 6 yr old boy to come for tea with DD, just in case his mother stopped for a coffee when she came to collect, having never been here before (and having a humungous beautiful house herself). Did she stop? no she didn't. make some lame excuse and disappeared with her DS.

So, for a pretty pointless reason other than my own pride which was not even noticed, I put my back out completely and utterly. On thursday evening. I have tried since then to get the pain and spasms under control and I simply can't.

DH has just left for the weekend to got to a stag do, DS has a stinking flu bug (he is 3) and luckily is feeling better today, but last night had a fever of 40 and was only reducing a little with meds. luckily he is now through that and although grotty, feeling much more perky with medicine. DD is snoty, cracked lips, but stoic and 'caring' for mummy.

The kids are well-behaved. Thank goodness we have a laptop, an i-pad, a Nintendo (which i didn't want DD to have) and an abundance of mostly scratched films to watch. Two of my friends are coming over this afternoon to help with the children/let me rest take valium but for now:

FUCKING HELL IT HURTS! And I can't even reach my coffee.

there. that's it. <lays back and sulks>

PavlovtheCat Sat 26-Jan-13 15:14:02

if i call DH he will be so fucking grumpy about it i might as well struggle on as I am. As ( and yes making excuses for him) its his boss from work's stag doo, and given the environment he works in, he will have the major piss taken if he comes early. I know, I know, he should grow a pair. but, he has chosen to go, knowing how it is here, so on that basis, he is not exactly going to be all lovely and sympathetic about it, I'd rather do it on my own than have a stroppy teenager dutifully caring for me with the hump.

PavlovtheCat Sat 26-Jan-13 15:14:49

and feel much much better now. pain levels 5/10 not the 7-8/10 this morning.

tribpot Sat 26-Jan-13 15:15:31

Oh I see - I couldn't work out why her test result would prevent her from coming to help you! Again, I can see why it's a very sensitive time for her but I would have thought there was plenty she could do to help that didn't involve close contact with ds.

That said - and I will say it again - the primary responsibility for looking after you and your dc is your DH's.

PavlovtheCat Sat 26-Jan-13 15:19:17

she dropped off paracetemol! that helped a lot. and her dh will do any shopping if i need it. normally she is always there for me. i don't feel bad she cant help today.

PavlovtheCat Sat 26-Jan-13 15:26:18

but you know what? we are broke as its the last week in jan. ans Sod It. I am getting an indian take-away. Just For Me.

PavlovtheCat Sat 26-Jan-13 15:39:30

dh ain't coming home. course he isn't. 'in the middle of no-where, i can't'.

Good for you, all things considered the least you deserve is a takeaway! How's DS' temperature now, is it still coming down? How's DD doing?

PavlovtheCat Sat 26-Jan-13 15:53:46

joyful yes temp is right down now, window is open, he is mostly naked and asking questions about things on the tv 'what does solid mean?' 'what is he making? it might be a blue bear?' 'can I have some porridge?' (first time he has asked for food for days). So much much less worried about him. And even if his temp spikes again, I now know he is ok as it has gone down and he is ok for now, so not for example meningitis or something.

I however, am very cold wink due to window being open! I can sit a little with minimum pain, as long as I don't move, which is much improvement to earlier. and i've been able to drink coffee without pain!

PavlovtheCat Sat 26-Jan-13 15:56:18

and DD is her normal wonderful cheerful happy self, making ds laugh, offering to get me things, watching Art Attack, luckily she is well, just snotty.

clam Sat 26-Jan-13 16:05:33

So, your and your children's pain and discomfort is trumped by the fear of your dh's sulky strop at doing the decent thing for his wife and family. hmm

All I can say is that he'd better make it up to you when he gets home.

Your DD is an absolute gem. smile I'm glad to hear DS has improved, the barrage of questions suggests he's feeling brighter too!

If your friend can't help with bedtime would it be an option to have the children in with you? Or DS at least, so you don't have to get up to him?

PavlovtheCat Sat 26-Jan-13 16:46:05

clam DSs discomfort is not compromised by him not being here, he has not been too demanding, I have been worried, yes, but he has mostly needed cuddles, medicine, water, and some sick cleaned up, DH wouldn't have done much differently. But, my discomfort has been the sacrifice as I have had less opp to take care of myself, when what I actually needed was to go to bed with my pain meds and be very still. and not had to clean the sick up! Make it up to me? yeah. not this weekend. Not mon-wed when I am meant to working (if I get there) thursday? nope, he is working. Friday? nope I am working. the weekend? nope, he is working. It doesn't matter. My condition has long gone from being something that conjures much sympathy and love and care to something that is a pain in the arse that get's in the way of things, not just with DH, with people generally. Apart from MN and strangers I don't even know. But you have not listened to me bang on all day every day (close to though wink

joyful she is the best. I bought her a stash of pretty hairclips and bows for her hair in sainsbo sale the other day for rewards and treats when she has done great things, motivation was she went up a book level. I let her choose one of them. I think I am going to give her another one for being so fabulous today.

PavlovtheCat Sat 26-Jan-13 16:47:24

joyful yes, they are both sleeping with me tonight. Or, rather, going to my bed, while I eat my take-away downstairs and watch casualty, if I can settle DS before that, he has had several naps today!

PavlovtheCat Sat 26-Jan-13 16:50:25

clam and not fear, I would just prefer that care and looking after of me is done with some love and kindness not with the atmosphere of a man whose mates are getting pissed without him and money been wasted. It's a moot point anyway, he isn't coming home. If I had continued in the same pain as I was at lunch time, I would have told him to get home by hook or by crook regardless of how much care he gave me.

PavlovtheCat Sat 26-Jan-13 20:21:32

Indian take-away arrived, kids in bed, sofa all fluffed and comfy (took a while) and now, ready to settle for some time completely on my own.

Thanks for helping me through today. I got there I think. DS is asleep with low ish temp, DD is hedging her bets for watching tv with me but in bed. and my back is painful but I can move now.

Thanks again

Thumbwitch Sat 26-Jan-13 23:05:51

Oh Pav - I totally get your point re. DH. And I suppose at least the DC have had a nice calm atmosphere in which to get better, rather than a super-charged grump-filled one.
I hope the deep heat is doing a good job on the sciatica for you and yes, just keep those muscles warm - it's probably going to hurt as much tomorrow (stiffer) but should be getting better by the day after, although the legacy you get from the muscle strain could be unpleasant - let's hope not though, eh. smile

Hope you get a decent night's sleep!

PavlovtheCat Sun 27-Jan-13 07:47:40

hey thumb deepheat has worked a little, although not sure how much is psychological as it burns a little so 'feel's' like it should do something iykwim.

Slept ok, after dealing with the Boy throwing up in bed, 15 mins into casualty starting, so that went out the window, but got to eat my take away first. Anyway, two children either side of me, tossing and turning so slept as well as can be expected! moving more freely, yes, stiff and sore, and some spasms and each step has to be trod with care as it keeps 'going' or rather threatening to go with each step, you know that wobble that almost has you collapsing in a heap? gingerly, slowly, but meds not kicked in yet and it's better than yesterday. DD has swimming lesson, already missed one due to other issues couple weeks ago, can't let her down, and know-one has come back to me able to take her. So, I will do it by hook or by crook.

PavlovtheCat Sun 27-Jan-13 11:21:48

Spams returned full force, walking with walls and dumb foot. But. Friend has just picked dd up for her swimming lesson amd the boy is where he is happiest.,.in the bath. I am lying on the bathroom floor with cushions under me. Cursing the iPad and its turning screen, have no idea how to lock the swivel. Texted my boss to let her know I am once again out if action. Poor woman it's not easy managing a team with me in it!

Dh has no idea when home, he was only one up when he called me at 9am. First one in bed at 1am but said couple people didn't drink so gonna get a lift with one of those if they are going in his direction. If not, he is stuck til some one is legal and unhungover enough to drive! So...3am, 21 units lets say, 1 hour per unit, prob 4-6 units already burnt up, 5pm? 2.5 hours away...he should have taken the car, not like I needed it!

This friend who has helped with swimming, she will prob stick around for a bit when she gets back from swimming, but, ds flu might put her off that!

Thumbwitch Sun 27-Jan-13 13:36:20

You poor love. But mega-hurrah for friend helping out with DD's swimming!
I hope she does stick around for a while, any rest you can get has to help.
Put more deep heat on your sacrum though. smile

PavlovtheCat Sun 27-Jan-13 13:46:50

She stuck around for a coffee, in the other room to ds as she was worried about getting flu, then remembered she had the jab before Xmas, but that he Dh needed to get to the gym, was at home with her dd waiting. So, as soon as ds cried out, and threw up spectacularly, she was gone! Admittedly she did wait til I cleaned him up, helped me get him out of (but not 'in') the bath and settled on the clean sofa, looking half concerned and half horrified! . All with her scarf around her mouth and nose! But, she helped out plenty, can't expect her to want to stick around and deal with sick children!

He really is a poorly mite. I am quiteworried, he has lost so much weight as he is not eating a thing (bit of toast this morning, tiny bit of pasta last night which he threw up)

PavlovtheCat Sun 27-Jan-13 13:47:48

Got another thread about his bug though, I am rocking and rolling this weekend ain't I?!

Thumbwitch Sun 27-Jan-13 14:00:35

You sure are! poor little soul, how awful for him - hope you're still able to give him lots of hugs.

PavlovtheCat Sun 27-Jan-13 14:01:39

Yes, but not too many he doesn't want me to touch him!

How are you and DS doing today?

Madsometimes Mon 28-Jan-13 12:06:56

Poor Pav. I read the title and just knew it was you sad.

The only thing I can suggest is calling the consultant's secretary, and asking if there is any chance of a cancellation appointment. I know this hardly ever works, but it did once for me, so it's always worth a go.

Hope ds is on the mend.

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