how long do your DCs spend with their other parent in the holidays?

(13 Posts)
sausagesandwich34 Wed 20-Feb-13 17:40:41

Dds go to their dad's feb half term and 2 weeks in the summer plus every other weekend

When he has them he brings them back to me on my day off to give his mum a day off from them because they miss me confused

They are 11&9 and he has only ever had them for 5 days in a row once

CuppaTeaAndAJammieDodger Wed 20-Feb-13 17:34:45

DD stats with EXH for half the holidays, this is a reasonably new arrangement but seems to be working OK.

Skyebluesapphire Sat 16-Feb-13 01:25:55

If your DS stays with him for more than 52 nights a year, he can deduct maintenance accordingly. XH has DD for 2 nights EOW. and then in the holidays he will now be having her the Sunday night as well. He hasnt asked to reduce maintenance, I dont think that he is aware that he can..... But I dont think it will ever go over the 52 nights, ie, this weekend, he should have her 3 nights, but has let her down tonight, so it will only be 2.....

I don't think that it's right that you should pay for holiday clubs when your son is in the care of your XH, however it sounds like you will have to argue it out with him. i don't think there is any legal advice on that..... I suppose it depends on how you initially agreed the maintenance costs with him

gracehedley Thu 14-Feb-13 00:20:55

My ex H asked to have our son for half of school holidays. This arrangement due to start in March when he moves out. However, he is now saying that what ever he does with our son in the holidays - e.g. sends him to holiday club if he is at work - I will have to pay for that - he will deduct it from maintenance. Money has already been deducted from maintenance he will be paying me to take in to account the number of nights our son will stay with him in school hols. Do you think this seems right? I don't hmm

Skyebluesapphire Wed 13-Feb-13 00:00:19

My XH refused to have his DD for 1 day a week in the summer holidays last year.... as he was too busy working, then went to Majorca for a week with his mates.

In mediation I got him to agree to have her every Monday in the holidays, although in practice, it only really happens if it is his weekend with her anyway.

There is no way that he would have her for half of the holidays. He is too selfish for that.

Generally speaking, there's no pleasing an ex!

DizzyHoneyBee Sun 03-Feb-13 15:26:58

So far I have agreed to what he asks for, now he is complaining that he doesn't have enough! No pleasing some people....

DP's DD is 3 and the court order (made late last year) was for 50% of school holidays, which includes the first three weeks of the summer. Not all contact orders are as prescriptive but theirs had to be because his ex wouldn't agree to any holiday contact at all.

RedRosy Sat 02-Feb-13 08:41:17

Hi
We split the holidays equally, and ex has the kids every second weekend. The DCs are 6,4, and 2.
Good luck x

Titchyboomboom Sat 02-Feb-13 06:46:09

Probably well out of date, but when I was little we only saw my dad the normal every other weekend, plus an extra week in hols. Only because he couldn't get time off though and my mum didn't work I suspect that 50/50 would have been the case if work wasn't an issue

Fairylea Sat 02-Feb-13 06:42:06

We share equally between us. Literally half and half.

This is further complicated by the fact ex now lives in USA. So dd goes out there with her grandparents sometimes and sometimes he comes here to stay with the grandparents to see her.

It's been this way since we split up when she was 8 months old. She is 10 years old this year.

Collaborate Sat 02-Feb-13 06:39:30

Courts are increasingly splitting school holidays down the middle. It's considered that where the children have a good relationship with both parents they will be no less upset spending time away from the father tan from the mother.

DizzyHoneyBee Fri 01-Feb-13 22:11:13

How long do your DCs see their NRP for in the school holidays without them seeing you in between, and how old are they?
Just trying to get a feel for what is reasonable please.

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