Skint and single? How on earth do you manage dating?

(23 Posts)
iamonstrike Wed 23-Jan-13 14:14:43

I think it's better not to invite them home, it just gives out the wrong message. And I'd hate to be running around tidying up before a big date!

I have cut back on spending to be able to pay for babysitters - of course they're expensive but it's more important for me to have adult social time than anything else. I used Match.com and I think it gave me freedom to date a lot of men who I wouldn't otherwise have met. All of them have been happy to pick up the bill for dates - don't see that that's unfair as usually they have much more disposable income.

When you get to a more serious stage, you can negotiate sharing the cost of babysitting (most men are fine with this, since it would otherwise mean you'd struggle to go out) or you can have a few cheaper nights in. So the expensive bit of new clothes, babysitter etc is only during the early stages anyway - and I see it as an investment if it leads to a committed relationship, living together, shared expenses anyway.

HollaAtMeBaby Mon 21-Jan-13 23:02:27

I think a walk in the park with a coffee is a good first date. If you get to a second date, make the man pay grin

FlatCapAndAWhippet Sat 19-Jan-13 20:45:15

I dont date either, single with dd since 2009 and really cant see it ever changing. I dont mind, we're very happy. A good job really though as I cant afford to go out, pay baby sitters and buy new clothes.

Sorry - that doesnt really help you.

OverlyYappyAlways Sun 13-Jan-13 18:19:51

Oh no I never had them home when DS were there, actually not a bad idea then they would run...No seriously I am not one for 'oh this in uncle peter this week'

I stupidly thought wine + DVD meant wine + DVD, it doesn't.

nkf Sun 13-Jan-13 17:57:11

I won't be entertaining at home. I have children and I don't want to get into domestic stuff with a man. Been there.

OverlyYappyAlways Sun 13-Jan-13 17:49:44

Don't entertain them at home, it's a nightmare trying to get them out.

Meglet Sun 13-Jan-13 17:36:58

I don't. XP was kicked out 4yrs ago and I barely even talk to men, let alone date them!

Kids, work and the gym / my sanity come first. I can't afford baby sitters and evenings out on top of that.

StuffezLaBouche Sun 13-Jan-13 17:34:11

Haha! Good thread smile
While feeling particularly low recently I invested £29.99 in a Match.com subscription. I am KICKING myself now as

a) I am beyond skint and £30 is a lot of money.
b) I have no clothes to wear so have been reluctant to get talking to anyone on there.

So not money well spent.

In my line of work it's fairly impossible to meet new, single men so I think I am destined to be single for the rest of time.

dashoflime Sun 13-Jan-13 13:24:57

Oops blush
Your too dry for me nfk. I like your style smile

nkf Sun 13-Jan-13 13:21:07

I was joking too. Feel weird about entertaining at home. Too domestic and all that.

dashoflime Sun 13-Jan-13 13:17:01

Sorry nfk, I'm just joking

More seriously, I do think entertaining at home is the way to go wink

nkf Sun 13-Jan-13 13:14:36

According to Wiki, "In Scotland, Buckfast is associated with drinkers who are prone to committing anti-social behaviour when drunk..."

Hmm. Maybe not.

dashoflime Sun 13-Jan-13 13:04:29

May I suggest instead

wink

dashoflime Sun 13-Jan-13 13:00:23

Oh my God!! Scrub White Lightning, its been discontinued!!

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_Lightning_(cider)

And I quote: "White Lightning was most commonly recognised by its distinctive blue bottle design, low price and high strength, making it popular with those wishing for alcoholic intoxication at a minimum price"

nkf Sun 13-Jan-13 12:18:50

Thank you, Dash. Do you have the recipe for White Lightnings?

dashoflime Sun 13-Jan-13 10:52:50

From my experience:

1. Invite equally skint male friend over to your house

2. Drink white lightening in front of telly

3. Fall into bed for sloppy drunk sex

4. Assess potential for relationship over tea and cornflakes the following day.

Two slight disclaimers:

Isn't suitable for proper grownups
Doesn't lead to very satisfying relationships

OverlyYappyAlways Sun 13-Jan-13 10:46:50

Yeah the lack of clothes is not a great help, I am a 2/3 date person, anymore than that and I am re-wearing clothes, thankfully I do not date often. I am on a dating break, I will collect clothes and save money for when I am ready again, or something

MissPricklePants Sun 13-Jan-13 10:42:40

nkf it did bother me but it doesn't at the moment, I have been single since 2009 so used to it now.

PigletJohn Sun 13-Jan-13 10:41:39

"How do you date on a budget? A small budget I might add"

dining out at the carvery. Steak night at Wetherspoons. Haunt the clearance basement at Debenhams. Romantic weekend away in a Travelodge during their discount week. Meeting people who are equally skint will prevent a clash of expectations.

meeting someone nice is harder than managing on a budget.

nkf Sun 13-Jan-13 10:39:15

I hear you. Does it bother you?

MissPricklePants Sun 13-Jan-13 10:34:46

I am skint and single, and my answer is I don't date. Cannot afford a sitter, to go out etc so I just don't. Not the best advice to your OP but maybe somebody will have a better suggestion!

nkf Sun 13-Jan-13 10:31:01

Any ideas?

nkf Sun 13-Jan-13 10:22:43

I think that I might be ready to take the plunge back into the dating game or whatever it's called nowadays. Not going to be easy because I am not - ahem - particularly young. Or particularly glamorous, Or particularly anything but there you go. Still fancy giving it a go.

The money thing worries me. Going out more, buying better clothes, going on dates - it will require more money won't it?

How do you date on a budget? A small budget I might add.

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