To dread homeschooling

[Johan23]

I’m in Scotland where the schools don’t go back to the 11th, and for a week it will be remote learning (I imagine it will be longer). In the last lockdown my son was still at nursery, so we didn’t have to homeschool.

It was still a freaking nightmare working from home as he wanted our attention all of the time.

Our work is going through a ridiculously busy period, and we are all expected to just “get on with it”. But, I am totally stressing as I really can’t bear to go through all this juggling again.

You are absolutely right but people will be along in a moment to tell you your difficulties don’t matter I’m afraid and you have to suck it up, regardless of the impact on your own health.

This time you have time to plan and think of activities to keep your DS occupied and not interrupting you for a set amount of time. Get a timer and tell him he can't interrupt up until the times up, give him a couple of minutes attention and set the timer and an activity for him.

I feel the exact same. DS1 is in 1st year (where he's done sweet fanny adams already this year) and he was a nightmare to home school last time. He's lovely but quite an immature 11year old, needs routine etc.
DS2 is 14 months and permanently grumpy and I'm 31 weeks pregnant with DS3 🙃
I feel like if I knew it was only going to be until the 18th for definite then I could push through but we've had that lie so often that I just can't believe it will.

Homeschooling a p1 is gonna be rough at the best of times never mind while WFH so I'd say just do the bare minimum. Wee stories and counting and if you have the strength then a bit of art (*shudders)
You'll get through it, it will be okay x

@LynetteScavo

This time you have time to plan and think of activities to keep your DS occupied and not interrupting you for a set amount of time. Get a timer and tell him he can't interrupt up until the times up, give him a couple of minutes attention and set the timer and an activity for him.

Assuming the child is in reception, the expectation that he'll stick to a timer is likely totally unrealistic.

OP, totally sympathise.
I’m dreading it too.
Self employed, and need to start drumming up some business in January as I haven’t got any work lined up.
Supervising school work at the same time going to be a nightmare.
I just thank my lucky stars that I only have one DC. Sympathy to anyone who needs to supervise more than one, don’t know how you did it last time...

I can try the timer, but
Very unlikely it will work. Last lockdown my manager allowed me to work random hours, but it’s a new place (tuped a month ago), and I just don’t think it will wash with them; they are very fast paced and expect you “on” all the time

Is there anyone who can help you with childcare even for a day? He doesn't have to isolate. Are you allowed a childcare bubble?

Where is his father in this?

His father may be working at home too (with luck), but may be required at work (he’s trying to push for wfh).

I don’t have anyone I can leave him with; my parents are 100s of miles away, and DHs parents are shielding.

Are you allowed to have paid childcare in Scotland? Sorry, I haven't been keeping up with the rules there. If you're not too rural, can you organise someone local to come to your home to "babysit" during the day?

I've not got any advice, just reassurance that you're not alone. Like posters above have suggested, if they said it was definitely just until the 18th I'd feel better, but they cant. I found it impossible to WFH (I do appreciate that I am lucky to be able to WFH) and do homeschooling at the same time in March. It's grim.

@TheDailyCarbuncle - if it's a visual timer and the child can see when it's going to end (there are online ones, or large sand timers) then most 4 year olds can stick to it if there's a reward at the end.

You’ll end up parking him in front of a screen for hours on end. I’ve been there. It’s fucking impossible.

If we are in this position again (we’re in ROI) I honestly think I’ll have to ask MIL to help if, like last time, paid help is impossible to get hold of.

Have taught infants and don't think it's unrealistic to expect a P1 (reception/Y1 age) child to have a timer and not interrupt for short bursts of time. Not sure that will really help you get through a whole day though! It's a very tough situation and I feel for you.

BBC Bitesize is your friend: www.bbc.co.uk/bitesize/levels/zf7hgwx

I feel your pain. The first lockdown nearly broke me to be honest.

The guilt I felt over having my child in front of a screen for 10 hours a day was just unendurable.

I don't know what the solution is really. I would be amazed if we don't have a second schools shutdown in January.

Honestly just do what you can when you can and don't worry about it. I have a 5yo so I understand your situation. If you get 1 thing done that's great if not it's no big deal thankfully the younger ones have a long time to catch up . Be kind to yourself and do whatever to get through the day

Feel exactly the same sense of dread.
I’m exactly the same as you , I feel that if it was DEFINITELY back on 18 Jan then I could push through.

But I really don’t think it will be the 18th.

Have read that the EIS teachers union have been asking for continued blended learning.

Blended / online learning does NOT work if you have multiple kids of different ages.

It does not work if parents are working full time.

Every parent I know is dreading this.

I’m glad I’m not the only one dreading this. A few of my friends are sending their kids to grandparents or working part time: I’m technically part time (32 hours per week), but lately have been working 40 hours a week due to a big project

Take annual leave
Can you and DH work some half days and make up time in the evenings. Really shit I know but hopefully only for 2 weeks.

I really sympathise OP and there is no helpful advice or answers. I'm in England so I don't know my DCs won't be going back but I think we are all starting to suspect that might be the case.

DH can't work from home so it'll just be me with an 8 and 6 year old and full on work four days a week. In the last lockdown and on the two occasions the eldest has isolated I've had to start as early as 4am to get everything done. I'm grateful they let me work like that but it's exhausting and we all end up getting on each other's nerves.

I'm a key worker last time you had to both be key workers to get any provision. It was childcare so you were expected to start schoolwork with a tired, grumpy six year old at 15.30. That isn't a great option.

I feel guilty because the 6 year old has been back in school since June uninterrupted. The 8 year old didn't go back until September and has had four weeks of isolation. Each time I've felt so crushed for her and her mental health has definitely suffered being at home with no friends, learning in front of a screen but at least she can do some things independently. I am honestly am dreading my six year old being home again.

I'm considering asking to go on unpaid leave if the schools close for a long period again and using savings to finance it. My work would not be happy at all though and I worry it would put me first on the redundancy list.

@User56770987 is right if it's short term.... try and start really early so you can have a couple of hours off in the morning. You don't get much more than a few hours learning out of such a young child. Your DH can do the reading when he gets in.

Very unlikely to get annual leave, as I am working on a key project which unfortunately has a deadline late Jan: I was expecting to have to work loads of extra hours anyway, but the idea of balancing that with looking after DS is just making me feel ill

Part of me thinks that large businesses need to take a bit of the hit on stuff like this and show their staff some understanding and flexibility

My kids are older (10+) but I’m not doing it again. I will keep wfh, and then pay for an online SATS tutor if it becomes needed next year. That is a far better use of all of our time and resources, than me spending hours trying to work out SPAG (and ultimately failing ), then losing my job, bye bye house.

Much harder with younger less independent kids though, that can’t be put in front of screens for hours.

I don’t feel guilty about screen time any more. It’s not good. But I’m not a fucking magician, and we need my wage as well as DH’s to keep a roof over our heads.

The school will have to put up with it, as my employer doesn’t pay me to spend time trying to teach my children stuff I don’t understand.

Honestly I would try and get a childminder then. Pretty sure that's allowed