Anyone else getting fed up of all the sex?? [grin]

(25 Posts)

Hello! Just thought I'd give you hope as you sound like I did 12 months ago and I am now 37 weeks pregnant with number 3! It will happen! Trust me. And all that sex on demand will be worth it. My poor DH was really fed up of me and I was really fed up too - each month passing by. Sigh. Now we hardly ever do it blush

asianbabe Fri 23-Oct-09 09:57:11

Hi All

Thought i'd pop over to this thread as having the say problem. Im TTC ans am only on Cycle 1 and i'm totally fed up with all the BDing!!!

But hoping it won't take too long.

DuelingFANGo Fri 16-Oct-09 15:44:26

I think this happens to men because they are put on the spot/tired/stressed.

Is there anything you can do to 'help him along' blush?

kkas Fri 16-Oct-09 15:41:22

somewhat related question - does anyone else's DP/DH get 'stage fright'? i have really tried not to put any pressure on him by saying it's ov time. and i do try to initiate sex throughout the cycle so it's not too obvious that i'm only after ttc sex. but i would say at least half the times i have initiated it since we made the decision to ttc, it has gone soft for no apparent reason. when it happens around ov time i get quite emotional bc i think this will never happen for us. it is really starting to affect our sex life and i also think poor dh's confidence. any advice?

LadyoftheBathtub Fri 16-Oct-09 11:11:40

Oh no Lainey sorry that was at the OP! (which means original poster on the thread )

Lainey1 Fri 16-Oct-09 10:43:11

Sorry Lady of the Bathtub - been trying to conceive for 17 months. What I meant was, I was given 6 months of clomid but 2 cycles were wasted, due to the strain of having sex!

I have an appointment with my gynaecologist in November, but I don't know whether I am going to cancel now or not. My DP is very, very stressed with his job currently too so not the best of times.

I wonder if some things are just not meant to be?[hmmm]

DuelingFANGo Fri 16-Oct-09 10:39:10

oh and blush I actually posted in this thread last year when it was started.

blush and sad

DuelingFANGo Fri 16-Oct-09 10:37:10

me, me, me .... been trying for 2 years and now on clomid so important that we do it around the times we need to. It's nice of course but I am guessing we wouldn't be doing it as much if we weren't TTC. Our sex life would be more 'normal'. Sometimes I laugh out loud while doing the shagging because the whoe thing is totally ridiculous and so un-spontaneous!
I much prefer the sex we have when I am not ovulating or about to ovulate!

LadyoftheBathtub Fri 16-Oct-09 10:35:01

oops mean = moan

LadyoftheBathtub Fri 16-Oct-09 10:33:54

Lol at the OP being fed up of sex at cycle 2.... you amateur! 18 months of too much sex resulted in my current pg. <pant> Now I really miss sex though, because I'm still feeling ill and can't face it.

I have a friend who was TTC over much of the same period and she felt the same so I had someone to mean to about it. I also found it was covering up wanting to do it for TTC reasons that was so stressful - pretending I really wanted sex when I actually wanted to just go to sleep SO MUCH. In the end we did start being more honest. I would say "Please can we have sex and yes it is because I'm ovulating". Then we were both happy with a quickie. Other times I could honestly say I was not ovulating and was just in the mood - I think that really helped.

Lainey sorry about your feelings - because it took us a long time (at almost 40) I really know that feeling of despair when other people get pg. It's not selfish and it's very normal.

"bding" = babydancing - cutesy term for trying-to-conceive sex!
DH - dear or darling husband - strange but widespread web forum usage. You can also have DP (partner), DS (son), etc.
EWCM = egg white cervical mucus - a sign of being about to ovulate.

Lainey1 Fri 16-Oct-09 10:30:39

Ignore me! State of mind! I just found the link to 'acronyms' and worked out the 'EWCM!'
(blush)

Lainey1 Fri 16-Oct-09 10:21:56

...also, please could somebody explain what 'bding' and 'DH' and 'EWCM@ means...

Lainey1 Fri 16-Oct-09 10:17:49

Hi, I am new to this, but have been reading with interest. I am 43 years and have been trying to conceive on clomid. I feel like I wasted 2 cycles due to my partner's lack of interest in sex, and like 'Ilove being a mummy,' I was pretending to be horny at the right times (what I think were the right times anyway)and ended up looking like a desperado! In the end, I told him that I was trying to get the timing right, but without putting pressure on him too. I just thought that if he could manage to retain his interest in sex, all I had to do, was wait and receive his sperm. (Sorry, I know that sounds crude and cold).

Consequently, my partner could not muster up any interest though - too much sex became a big turn-off which added to the stress. The trouble is, I am getting older and I can feel my chances slipping away. I am really worried.

He told me that we should stop trying to conceive and that if it happens, it happens as it is affecting our sexual relationship dramatically. At this rate, we will be like brother and sister, so I do understand where he is coming from, but I know how much he would love children too.

I feel so much pain when somebody announces their pregnancy, that I want to run away and cry. I know this is very selfish of me, but I so want to be able to say the same... I feel like I am becoming such a terrible person.

Ilovebeingamummy Wed 05-Nov-08 16:05:15

BTW Have finally been honest about it (in the upset of af arriving) so hopefully can drop a bit of the wanton sex beast act this month! LOL

Ilovebeingamummy Wed 05-Nov-08 16:03:09

I just looked at my OP and have just worked out that I probably ov on CD22 going by cycle length....we.stopped bding at CD19...

Must find energy to keep going this month.....

spats Sat 18-Oct-08 11:44:30

not alone, my DH says its either famine ir feast around here!!! Try to do it in the week before ovulation to keep him happy but heart not in it as know its not very productive!! how horrid is that!!

Ilovebeingamummy Wed 15-Oct-08 20:08:38

Oh goody...I'm not the only one after all!

Dh knows of course he does. Not that he would have a clue yellowflowers about when conception and non-conception weeks are like your dp/h. I'm positive that EWCM discussions would kill the erectile tissue dead.....LOL

I think its just me carrying on this ridiculous charade ..which he probably is enjoying...after all I have been either pg or bfeeding since sept 2004 and as the others never took any <trying> to conceive this is the first time I've ever needed to do the wanton sex-beast bit (well put ECat)!

Anyway its working for now as we did at least conceive last month so lets hope it works and sticks this month

So glad I am not alone

Morloth Wed 15-Oct-08 18:22:54

I wish I could be sick of the sex, we just haven't seemed to have managed it for ages - just so many other things going on, different schedules at the moment etc.

ExistentialistCat Wed 15-Oct-08 18:13:32

This is a BRILLIANT thread! I've been thinking that I must be rather odd, because all of my RL friends have said how the babymaking aspect made sex so much more special and exciting, whereas it's not been like that at all for me. Something we used to do purely for pleasure and intimacy seems to have become a means to an end.

Like you, yellow, I eventually decided to be honest about it and DH seems to have taken that well. At least it takes the pressure off pretending to be a wanton sex-beast (lol ilove)!

pinkspook Wed 15-Oct-08 16:18:09

15 cycles on - yes I am fed up of all the sex!

beanieb Wed 15-Oct-08 15:59:03

I don't like it being so unspontaneous. Been trying since Last year and I want to go back to wild un-planned sex.

me neither - I spend hours on here each day reading about it. I decided to be onest in the end in a big crying fit/row in which I confessed how not only was the sex exhausting, but more exhausting was the having to pretend it was because I was horny rather than being honest about needing to do it. What I have done though is in the non conception weeks also mad an effort to initiate sex so that he knows it is not just for babymaking as at those times there would be no chance.

Ilovebeingamummy Wed 15-Oct-08 15:01:59

I don't mention the baby making anxious that he won't be at all turned on by it! So I am ridiculously carrying on pretending to be some sexy siren who wants to ravage him all the time for my own personal pleasure!

Even lay there last night in the throes of ecstasy (!) dreaming about ways of inventing a sperm tap and turkey baster, or a jar in the fridge! LOL

Not really - the love makes the baby...right? Although I have no idea exactly when my other 2 were conceived and I kind of prefer it that way. This ttc lark is not good for my obsessive inclinations...

I agree. I feel like I am nagging him all the time for sex even though he agrees it is for him too as he also wants a baby. On Mon for example we were both shattered and we still had to do it - no fun at all. I want to tonight too just to guarantee we get it - think I ovulated on Sat and we did it on Thurs, Sat, Sun, Mon but just in case I didn't ovulate then...

Tbh we usually mainly do it on weekends and not that often in the week but ttc means havign to change all that. Which would be fine if we were the kind of people who stayed in both nights but we both have loads of work stuff on and busy social lives. aaaaaaargh

Ilovebeingamummy Wed 15-Oct-08 14:08:51

Slightly tongue in cheek, I must admit...but...

we are on cycle 2 of ttc no.3. I had no idea of cycle length last month (haven't kept track since they returned post bfeeding in feb) so guessed at the 'average' 28 days and bd every other day from CD 9 to CD19! Got positive HPT on CD35 then began to bleed on CD39.

Bleesding lasted 3 days. I seem to have ovulated at normal time (EWCM between CD12 and CD18 - long time??) so have bd again every other day between CD8 and 19. I am going by EWCM because i donlt have the right sleep pattern or the time/inclination for OPKs...

I'm knackered! I am praying for a sticky bean this time because this is really too much sex for me Don't get me wrong, its nice, but its too much of a good thing now for definite!

We have dd3.4, ds 20mths and I have a job and a uni course too....desperate for number 3 and desperate for a break from all the (lovely sex)!

....come on bfp!

Am I alone in this??!!

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