It hurts to go the toilet (or do anything really) 6 weeks after having my baby! Help!

[TheDetective]

Just want sone tales to cheer me up really. I am feeling quite upset at the level of discomfort I still have 6 weeks down the line.

It hurts to sit, stand, walk, pee, and poo. That is pretty much everything I am doing then. It isn't the same pain. It varies. Some of the pain is a low level ache, some a throbbing pain, some a continuous soreness, some is sharp and stabby.

I had my baby almost 6 weeks ago, forcep birth, fairly easy forcep delivery as they go, but a HUUUUUGE episiotomy was performed. It extends right down to my arse cheek. You can see the end of it if I lie on my back and you look at my bum, without lifting my leg up. My GP has looked at it and confirms, yes it's huge. He couldn't find the top of it on an internal examination (to try and remove any non dissolved stitches to rule this out as a cause of the discomfort). It is lumpy both inside and out. Clothing (and bumcheek!) rub against the outside scarring, and it hurts. It doesn't feel stitched correctly truth be told.

When I wee, as I finish it hurts, a throbbing pain, in the urethral area. I have no urine infection, and having been a sufferer of them for years previously it isn't the kind of pain you would get with a UTI. When I open my bowels this also hurts the episiotomy area. It is like a pressure pain with stinging. I also bleed from the episiotomy almost every time I go. It is fresh red blood, then followed by an orange/pink discharge. I have checked time and time again for piles. No piles. It is 100% blood vaginally. The lochia tailed off around 3 weeks ago. I haven't been wearing pads since then. It only happens on opening bowels.

Now, this sounds strange, but one of the only things not to hurt, and in fact, do the opposite - give me some relief (!!) was when the GP examined me with a speculum. The stretching sensation gave a sense of relief. And so did sex, very gentle sex, the stretching sensation again made things feel better for about an hour after. There is no pain to touch the episiotomy inside or out. It seems that the pain is deeper almost?

I have no control of my pelvic floor. I can't stop mid flow. The sensation to urinate just isn't the same. I don't know if I need to go, or I really really need to go. It is just a dull feeling of needing to go, sometimes it's a smaller amount, sometimes it's a huge amount. I am struggling to do pelvic floors due to lack of sensation.

I'm fucked aren't I? I'm going to have to live with this the rest of my life, or if not this bad, I'm never going to go back to normal, am I?

Is anyone else in the same boat, or been through similar who can shed some light on this for me?

[Cheddars]

No real experience of this but 6 weeks isn't that long. I remember moaning to the HV that I could barely walk upstairs 6 weeks after a forceps delivery.

Hopefully someone more knowledgable will be along soon and congratulations on your baby.

[wannabedomesticgoddess]

Not quite as bad as that, but I had DD2 7 weeks ago. Ventouse delivery with an episotomy.

It still hurts to poo and last week I had an uncontrolled bowel movement. I just couldnt stop it.

The pain is stingy but also a dull pain further up that really hurts sometimes.

I cant tell that I need to pee until Im almost wetting myself, and I did wet myself a few times but none in the last week or so.

Definately get back to the gp about the scar. It doesnt sound right at all. Insist on a referral to a specialist.

So some of what you are experiencing sounds normalish to me, but a lumpy scar doesnt. Hope you get sorted.

[TheDetective]

Thank you! Feel more normal now! I have been to the GP and am waiting for a referral for my 6 week check from the hospital, and a physio referral for my pelvic floor. Just a shame it's over Christmas and new year... everything is delayed. Will ring on Friday if I haven't had an appointment through.

[wannabedomesticgoddess]

I rang today for my 6 week check appointment (6 weeks was xmas day so bit delayed) and was told its now an 8 week check. Maybe just here though.

Really hope you get sorted. TMI but Iv just been for a BM and it was really sore, bleeding and now my lower abdomen is painful from it. This is bad enough without a painful scar too. Really feel for you.

[leannac]

I had an emergency venteuse following 3 hrs of pushing & episiotomy following by further surgery as I then haemorrhaged. I'm not sure exactly which of these caused my pain but I had pretty much the same pain as you. With the added bonus that for the first 2 weeks I had so little control over my bladder that sometimes when I stood up I would just wee everywhere as I hadn't been aware I needed to go & my bladder just emptied. It was very dark times, quite depressing & I fully expected to never recover & be at least a little incontinent forever.

I had to keep wearing maternity pads (from the freezer with witch hazel on as those first few mins of relief from the pain were the only relief I would get all day) for 8/9 weeks, not just for bleeding but in case I wet myself. I was referred to a physio for pelvic floor training but got my apt as an urgent one at 6 weeks post delivery & was still ok so much discomfort that physio refused to treat me saying I should refer myself again around the 12 week mark (at my apt I couldn't sit still on chair as so sore still).

Anyways, good news is that by 12 weeks the discomfort & proper lack of control over wees had gone! As had the pain. I am super impressed you've had sex already as it took me until 15 weeks before I wasn't too scared of the pain to try!

That was 18 months ago & I've had no serious long term effects. I still

[leannac]

Wee a little sometimes when I cough or sneeze but seems loads of people have that. Plus I'm 8 months pregnant again now which doesn't help bladder issues.

Get everything checked out but bear in mind that this doom laden life of discomfort & slight incontinence is normal & should go away! Good luck!

[mayhew]

This is a slow recovery and you definitely need consultant review.Its sounds like physio is most likely to help you. The gynae will not want to do anything invasive in the relatively early stage, while you are still healing. Because its amazing what the body can achieve by itself. The symptoms could be due to severe bruising, possibly haematoma, within the pelvis, causing pain and pressure. The body usually reabsorbs and repairs this.The physio will help you fine tune your pelvic floor exercise technique so you can get results faster. she might also be able to offer ultrasound treatment which can speed the healing process and give relief.

[priscilla101]

I didn't have the injuries you had, but had the bright red vaginal blood every time I poo'ed until around the 6 week mark. I too thought it must be piles but had none, and was worried that there was something very wrong. Then it just stopped. Literally overnight. It is like I regained control of my sphincter and pelvic floor and all was well.

Like I say, no stitches or trauma here, so wouldn't want to compare my experience with yours too much (IYSWIM), but fingers crossed you heal quickly!

[cravingcake]

I can promise it does get better!

I'm 14 months down the line after 4th degree tear, forceps, shoulder dystocia and a large episiotomy which tore also.

Dont want to alarm you but it took me to around 8-10months to feel 'normal' again in the sense of really beig able to tell if i needed a wee or not. I had physio for pelvic floor which was brilliant, the lady was lovely and did tell me i was still quite bruised at 12 weeks after delivery.

I'm still not right and have spoken to my gp and was referred to gynae consultant, and i'm now waiting til end of this month to see another for a second opinion (on my gp's advice - i have overgrowth of scar tissue so different to your situation). I guess i'm trying to say speak to your gp, be honest with them as that is the only way you will get the right help.

Dont beat yourself up about the 'magic 6 weeks' mark. Some of us just take a bit longer to get better after a traumatic birth. Theres 2 really good support threads, one called Raggedies and another for Prolapses etc. am on phone so cant link but they are both in the general health section.

[delilah88]

Hello, I had nothing as bad but did have pain when I weed in the urethra for a lot longer than I expected to. Turns out it was due to bruising from a catheter I had during labour, and it went away eventually.

[maxbear]

Poor you! I had no tearing or stitches first time around but found that I had a pain similar to your urethral pain and pain on stimulation (ie foreplay) for about four months post birth. I had had an easy birth so was surprised to find it felt so bad for ages, I can only imagine how horrible it must be if you have had a large epis as well. I would suggest that six weeks is not enough time to expect a full recovery and you will recover in time. However it would be worth seeing your gp for a physio referral and possibly a gynae referral (in time if it does not heal in the long term.)

[Mrbumpoid]

@delilah88 how long?