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Early waking is killing me!!!

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By Fri 29-May-09 07:20:12 Add message | Report | Contact poster

Hi

Has anyone got any advice on how to deal with a 10 month old who has been waking at 5.15am for the last 2 months?

Here's the situation:

He goes to bed 7-7.30pm every night after bath and milk (8oz)
I don't rock him to sleep
He has black out blinds in his room
He is at the top of the house so there's no noise that should wake him up at that time
He eats well in the day
When he wakes up at 5.30am he is really grumpy - he definately needs to go back to sleep.
Most mornings I can get him back to sleep (after about 45 mins), by which time my 2.5 year old is usually up (grrrr).
I have tried 'wake to sleep'for 5 nights running - all that happened is his waking got earlier!
I have tried baby whisperer 'pick-up put down' for a month and it doesn't seem to be making any difference.
I do not feed him at 5.30am because I don't think he needs it. If I manage to get him back to sleep, when he wakes again he is chirpy and seems happy to wait for his bottle at about 7am. I also don't want to send the message that it's OK to wake for milk at that time.

I am so BORED and tired of starting my day so early. I look after both my kids all day every day and the days seem VERY long at the moment.

It might not seem so bad to some, but I have to contend with waking toddlers/bad dreams/teething/illness in the night as well so my the time 5am comes round I am well and truly DEAD ON MY FEET.

Please tell me - are there any strategies that really work on early waking? I am prepared to try anything.

Thanks

Harriet

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Sat 10-Oct-09 21:14:16

oh god i feel your pain, we had months of this.
my only useful tips are:
1. go to bed at 9pm as often as possible. dull, but preserves sanity
2. arrange some exhausting afternoon activity (swimming?) that tires them out
3. sounds weird, but try the more sleep thing - put to bed earlier, see if they're napping for long enough. it is utterly counter intuitive but we really did find sleep begets sleep
4. repeat to self: it's not forever. really its not. he is now 2 and sleeps in past 7.

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Sat 10-Oct-09 11:08:17

Natlex - exactly same here - over 18 months now of this - we are on 4.30am now whatever we do in the day or whatever time he goes to bed - he is 21 months old now - and its getting worse - I can't believe I moaned about 5.30am! I am so sick of it I can't tell you. It is driving me totally insane - people are now telling me I need to just leave him to scream and maybe after 2 weeks he will get the message I am not coming in to get him. Don't think I honestly have the energy to do that - he is such a screamer! I spoke to the HV and she just said its perfectly normal - some toddlers are just like this and I have to accept it. That made me feel even worse than I already do.

So sorry long ramble and of no help to you whatsoever.

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Sat 10-Oct-09 07:07:59

Hello

I have been battling with this problem for nearly 1.5 years now. My son is now 2 years 2 months. I think it is obvious that it is not a phase anymore, but there has got to be something to be done, surely? He's been doing 5.15am for a long time, winter, summer - doesn't matter. The last two nights, it's been 4.30am, which is a nightmare. The first night, he didn't even sleep with me when he woke up and went to play - rediculous and no idea how he lasts all morning. Today, he slept next to me until 6.00am. Not sure what to make of this. The first night he went to bed normal time at 7.00pm and yesterday I kept him up longer just to see, but no difference. All it seems to have done is wake him at the same time minus an hour of sleep, which he caught up on sleeping in my bed till 6.00am. Not sure what is worse, putting him to bed earlier and let him get up at 5.00am and not sleep anymore, or his waking up before 5.00am and sleeping with me for an hour.
I never ever sleep anymore once he is in my bed, as I can't even move, because it would wake him up again. Arguing with my husband moving in bed every morning when my son comes in. He wakes him up most of the time. It is a nightmare to have to deal with for over a year now.
HELP HELP HELP!!! I just want to know if it is just the way he is or ... but come on 4.30am has got to be a joke and can't possibly be normal time to wake up for anyone?
God bless!

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Thu 02-Jul-09 15:47:56

The best advice i got was from someone on mumsnet. They basically said accept it, go to bed earlier, make coffee, cbeebies starts at 6am.

Last summer i was up everyday at 5am, this year its going the same way - but now there are two of them....

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Thu 02-Jul-09 15:15:11

Mrs Bananas I do that!

Iam still BFing so whack a boob in his mouth.

Mine are up at 5.15too.

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Thu 02-Jul-09 12:12:54

My son started doing this at 18 months and still doing it - he is nearly 2. Today was 4.50am. To start with it would happen once or twice, then it got more frequent. Well, we went through the whole winter of this and now looks like we are in for the whole summer with the same. Spring was better - about 6.00am. No idea what to do.
I am afraid it gets worse - not better - from 18 months onwards. Was a lot better when he was younger.
Putting him to bed later makes things worse, not better, so going back to putting him to bed his normal time - just before 7.00am, as it doesn't seem to make any difference, makes it a few minutes longer in the morning, if nothing else.
Also going to try and cut down his afternoon nap to 1 hour over the weekend and see what happens. Don't know what I can do, to be honest, as he is always happy to get up and start the day - well, at least, that's something and he is not tired.
Best of luck to all of you and keep posting things, which work. I will, if it happens.

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Mon 08-Jun-09 14:14:09

my sympathies to the lot of you - we had months of this. the only thing i can suggest is (although it sounds utterly mad) try putting them to bed earlier. it's exactly the opposite of what you think would work but for some weird reason it worked for us. somehow the more overtired ds got (and he was knackered waking up at 5am just as i was) the less he was able to sleep well. putting him down an hour ealier somehow helped the clock reset itself, when he was reguarlly sleeping in to a more humane time (by which i only mean 6.30-7) we moved bedtime back again.
other than that second mrs mcluskey - get used to going to bed while it's still light...

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Sat 06-Jun-09 21:19:57

My DD has been getting up at 5ish recently but slept til around 6.30 this morning. I don't think it was a coincidence that it was very dark and overcast and so her bedroom was much darker than normal.

I of course was awake at 5 anyway and couldn't get back to sleep!

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 05-Jun-09 15:00:52

Let us know how it goes, Libra!

Also (and I know this is annoying because this whole thread - in fact this whole subject - is all so contradictory) - but I used to be obsessed with black out blinds etc. until recently, when our DS started waking in the night again (which he had not done for AGES) and my mum told me that I had needed a nightlight when a little baby. So I started leaving his blind a little bit open and he seems happier with it - I think it means that in the morning, when he wakes up, he isn't in pitch blackness so can kind of chill out by himself for a bit without panicking, and crying for us, if you see what I mean.

Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 05-Jun-09 14:43:45

Still had a 4:50am wakeup call this morning *sobs. However there is daylight coming in around the door edge so think I will try and do something about that tonight. By the time I finish not even air will be able to get in!!!
Put him to bed at 6:30pm last night which is earlier than usual, he is at nursery today so won't get back till 6pm but will try 5:30pm tomorrow.

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Early waking is killing me!!!