Hi
I've not posted here before (more of a lurker ) but I just wanted to add to this conversation. My brother has Tourettes and he's now 20 years old and although he still has it, it is so much better than it was when he was younger. He also suffers from OCD and elements of Aspergers and was diagnosed as dyspraxic when he was younger (although that may have been a misdiagnosis).
He has gone through just about every type of medication in his life and whilst some worked, others exacerbated the condition . . . sometimes he needed to take two lots of medication, one to counteract the effects of the other. Sometimes he forgot to take a dose, and it was unbelievably noticeable.
Speaking as an older sibling, somebody who had to grow up with this, I must be completely honest and say that it was not easy. I hope so much that your son doesn't have it to the same extent as my brother, and the fact that he doesn't have the other associated conditions does seem like a good thing. There were times when I wanted to kill him, because he drove (well, drives) me absolutely insane; he is impossible to have a rational argument with, having passionately unreasonable views and a tendency to scream and shout when things don't go his way. He would often pick the most hurtful things about us and shout them violently, even though he is, at heart, one of the sweetest and most generous people I have ever met in my life. He was never physically violent, not once. The only way to get through these outbursts was to repeat in my head, over and over again, that it wasn't him saying these things, but his condition. At other times I wanted to protect him against all of the hurt in the world; the looks that other people would give him when he ticced in a restaurant . . . the snide comments and bullying remarks of kids on holiday who didn't know him or understand.
All of this sounds so depressing, I know, and I'm sorry; I'm just being honest about my experiences, and apart from anything, Tourettes is such an individual thing for every patient that his (or my) experience of it won?t necessarily be anything like yours. Having said that, there actually are a lot of positives which can come out of this situation. For one, kids with Tourettes (like many other conditions on the autism spectrum) often tend to be incredibly artistic or musical . . . My brother had a fantastic natural ability on the saxophone (although he got bored after a few years and just stopped). He has also always been, rather paradoxically, and only at times, very mature for his age. Despite torturous outbursts, irrational spats, and bizarre tics, he has a well-balanced view of the world and will often come out with intelligent, insightful comments which none of the rest of us considered. It?s somewhat at odds with the rest of his behaviour, and I don?t know if it?s his personality or his condition, but it?s there nonetheless.
Despite his obvious intelligence, he was less academic than both my sister (now 15) and me (23), and left school at 17 after poor AS-levels (although that was in part down to his school). Incidentally, he went to mainstream school but had a special supervisor the whole way through, and a consultant he went to regularly, who was as much a therapist as a medical professional. He spent a year studying computer animated design because, again, he had a natural talent at it, and is now working full time in this field. Since then he has come off his medication to the extent that he only takes it when he really needs it; for specific concentration, when he is having a really bad day, or just because. He did have trouble with bullying when he was at school but he has come out the other side with wonderful friends, who are all the more wonderful for seeing him as he truly is, and past the tics (which have also lessened in recent years).
I will always see him as a little boy with the foot-shuffling tic who moved so slowly through the local shopping mall and was stared at by passers-by. I will always remember calmly telling the bullying boys on holiday, after he had left to change for supper, that I would smash their heads against the side of the swimming pool if they made one more comment about a boy they could never hope to live up to in generosity of spirit. He has been impossible to live with at times, and he will remain so forever ? it will never go away, or be cured, only managed, and accepted ? but he has also provided me with a view of the world that I could never hope to have had on my own.
He is now 6?3? and 20 years old, independent, driving (yes, he was allowed to drive) and the only long-lasting effects that my parents are particularly worried about is his inability to quite get the grasp of money and credit. It burns a hole in his pocket like nobody?s business, and they have to keep an eye on what he buys, especially now that he has an income. He still lives at home but he?ll move out eventually. He goes out on his own, he has a life, he has a career. He will always have this as a part of his life but it won?t stop him from living it. I admire him hugely and I love him dearly. The next few years of your son?s life won?t be easy, but it will be all right in the end. And the more he knows that you love him and are there for him, the easier and more enjoyable his life will be.
Good luck, and don?t worry. I wish you all the best and I?m sorry for the length of this mammoth post . . . I only hope it helps, a little.
And now back to my corner . . .