Mumsnet Moonwatch

Mumsnet Talk

"The country's most popular meeting point for parents" The Times
  Topics | Active | Search  
discountpartnersnew MEMBER DISCOUNTS Get a 10% discount from Boden (inc free delivery and returns). To see all member discounts, click here. Not a member yet? Join Mumsnet for free here. discountpartnersnew

Mumsnet TV

Tip of the day

Never ask a child IF they need the loo... moodlum

Quote of the week

CaptainNancy's (admirably succinct) family rules: "Don't be a dingbat/duffer. Keep calm and carry on. Dream big. Shut up and get on with it."

Recipe of the week

Carmenere's cinder toffee: sweet, sticky, made-in-five-minutes toffee squares that'll spark off a few 'yums' among the 'oohs' and 'aahs' of your little fireworks-watchers.

Follow mumsnet on...

TwitterFacebookYoutube

Mumsnet Talk


Start new thread within this topic | Watch this thread | Flip this thread |
Add a message

Jade - why nobody compliments our baby's name

(36 Posts)
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Mon 06-Jul-09 17:46:38
I just don't think people comment on babies' names. I don't. I say "ooh look at all that hair" or "what lovely eyes" or "isn't he big/long/sturdy etc etc" or "she looks like you" or some other form of idle comment to acknowledge that there is, in fact, a baby there. But that's it. Sorry.
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Mon 06-Jul-09 17:41:11
Ithink there are several reasons:

The Jade Goody reference has given the name a definite pigeonhole, for want of a better word. Not everyone identifies with her. Names are deeply personal and people need to identify with a name to really like like it. If they associate it with someone for whom they have no affinity (or a social group they do not relate to) it will alienate them. We all know names that we consider to be too posh, too downmarket, too boring, too trendy, too pretentious, etc. Whatever you chose it would enevitably fall into one of those categories for most people!

Jade is not a particularly unusual name and hasn't been, really, for 15 years or so. People have just got used to hearing it.

People only tend to say 'Ooh, what a beautiful name!' if it's something very unusual that they have never/rarely heard, and that immediately strikes them as lovely -assuming they don't hate it of course! Most new or unusual names take a bit of getting used to until they become sufficiently popular that we are no longer alienated by them.

I hate it when I'm told a baby's name because I am difficult to please and rarely impressed. I feel bad saying nothing, because it's kind of expected, and new parents are always thrilled with their own choice, but I'd be insincere if I waxed lyrical for the 99th time over Amelia or Luke.

I was a momentarily stumped for words when I recently met a baby girl called Kenyon though......shock Apart from anything else everyone will assume it's Kenyan, like Libyan or Syrian. Bizarre. Still, horses for courses as they say.
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Mon 06-Jul-09 15:01:02
That's the point though isn't it mumsiebumsie? No matter how beautiful your name might be - did your mother exist solely for compliments upon it? Somehow I doubt it.
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Mon 06-Jul-09 14:50:02
skihorse - yes people comment on my name all the time! But that wouldn't influence my decision to name my child - if me and my DH like it, that's good enough.
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Mon 06-Jul-09 13:09:35
Do people generally comment upon one's name? "oh hellurrr... what a lovely name you have"?
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Mon 06-Jul-09 12:37:53
I've worked for social services for 10 years caring for kids who are 'in need' or 'at risk' from socially deprived areas, and its in that capacity I have come across it a few times, along with names like Chantelle, Chanel, Tyson etc
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Mon 06-Jul-09 12:34:45
I think Jade is a lovely name, and it would have been one of my top choices except for the Jade Goody association. Having said that, I think that will fade very quickly and certainly won't be the perception by the time your DD is old enough to be aware of it. I think it is a very "natural" and pretty name, similar to all the flower names that are so popular at the moment.
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Mon 06-Jul-09 12:27:04
jade is very sweet - kids of her generation won't know jade goody so she'll be fine.

my daughter is called harriet - am pretty sure we didn't get lots of compliments on that one either but we don't care because we love it!
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Mon 06-Jul-09 10:45:54
If you love the name, why do you need to receive compliments from people?
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Mon 06-Jul-09 10:30:20
TEJQ - very much depends where you live. I've never met anyone called Jade or heard it screamed when out and about. Jade Goody and Jade Jagger are the only slebs with that name that I 'know'.
I still like it Valentina15 smile
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Mon 06-Jul-09 08:29:05
I like Jade as a name, but I do know many people consider it to be a chavvy name they associate with school-girl, smoking mums on the bus or in town yelling 'J-AAAAAAAAA-YY-DDDD-E' at the top of their voices at a toddler scuttling on ahead.
Buy her a few small pieces of Jade so she grows up with them in her mind and not Goody etc
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Sun 05-Jul-09 12:22:13
Just because they didn't say anything doesn't mean they don't like it. I think its a pretty name
Thank you for all your lovely messages!
Yes, Valentina is my name, thanks weepootle, people actually really like it - I have always secretly hated it while I was in Italy (my country of origin) but since I have been here, everybody seems to like it so much that it made me think twice.

Smac, I think Amber and Kerry are lovely names and like StealthPolarBear have said, when you meet someone with the name and you like them, the name grows on you. I think the person makes the name, rather than viceversa.

I never used to comment on baby's names either and I don't expect anything, but since I have had her and people have asked me her name, I also hate the silence that sometimes follows, like Jumente said!

Really thanks to everybody for their lovely comments, I feel better about the fact that once she is older she will like her name as much as we do. For us she is the prettiest and sweetest little girl in the world, so that's what matters!
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Sat 04-Jul-09 18:10:38
I love the name Jade. I wanted to have it as DD's middle name but DH was not keen.

I think it is not so popular at the moment because of Jade Goody - she had really bad press for so long (totally undeserved IMO, I voted for her when she was originally in BB grin). But lots of people have those connotations but in time, they'll totally vanish - especially by the time she is a teenager, lots of people will probably be calling their babies Jade. Don't worry about it, I love it (and I am quite fussy with baby names!).
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Sat 04-Jul-09 18:02:21
Jade is a lovely name. And don't worry about what other people think/say. You might not like their choices, either.
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Sat 04-Jul-09 18:01:54
Us too Jumente - the best one I can remember is (after a silence) "Oh well it's one he can grow into" hmm still not quite sure what she meant!!

And Jade is a lovely name
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Sat 04-Jul-09 17:44:35
It's a lovely name. Few people say they like DSs name either but we like it, that's the main thing!
Oh it's better than an uncomfortable silence. We had a lot of those with ds2! People just went '...Oh....[silence]...well he'll just be called '[shortened version of name which is more acceptable] though won't he, so that's Ok' grin

I think I really blew it for the poor little guy.
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Sat 04-Jul-09 13:45:28
I don't comment on names unless I really love them-if people have already chosen them it would be rude of me to give my true opinion.
How strange. I never comment on other people's children's names, and would likewise never expect comments on what I've named mine.

I think you're being a bit sensitive. It's just not something that is usually commented on. Tastes in names vary hugely, so you really can't expect everyone else to think Jade is as lovely a name as you do. If they did, every baby girl out there would be called Jade!!
I used to love the name Jade, but went off it a bit when JG was in Big Brother. OTOH if I knew a little girl called Jade I bet it would grow on me again.
In a few years it will be back to being a short and sweet name IMO
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Sat 04-Jul-09 12:50:48
I like the name Jade. I also like Amber but on here people keep saying Amber is a porn star name and Jade makes them think of Jade Goody. I also like Kerry but people make the connection with Kerry Katona too.
I wouldn't worry about it. I think you have chosen a lovely name smile
I really like the name Jade. I wouldn't let the Jade Goody thing worry me either. She was a bit of a love or hate figure but she wasn't Hitler so can't see why it would be an issue.
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Sat 04-Jul-09 09:12:49
I take it your name is Valentina? It's a lovely name smile.
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Sat 04-Jul-09 08:41:56
I like Jade

http://babynamelover.wordpress.com/
Thanks girls - sorry but last night my hubby came back from his night out just when I had posted this and then I spent some time with him and could not check back on line.
People do comment on how pretty and sweet she is, so maybe you are right, they are busy doing that!
We knew about the association with Jade Goody, but of course we didn't let it affect us too much. I think I had too many expectations because people always remark on my name, but then again my name is unusual in the UK...and Jade isn't.
So thanks for clearing this up, it has helped!
It's a nice name, but I don't think it's very fashinable atm...it's not unusual either, so people aren't suprised to hear it.

Are peopel too buisy commenting on how ppretty you DD is?
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 03-Jul-09 22:40:00
It a lovely name and I'm sure like others have said people think of Jade Goody, but that won't be the case when she is older.

I met a 20 year old Jade the other day who was very confident.
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 03-Jul-09 22:38:43
I don't think a name is the only thing they can compliment though is it, in small talk?

What about your baby being
(circle or delete as appropriate)

Good, quiet, feisty, possessor of a 'good set of lungs', cute, pretty, cuddley, sweet, precious, precocious (an excellent word if nothing else which always reminds me of Mary Poppins), calm, happy, strong...

Ok i'm bored listing now, but you get the picture!

Or then again you may live around a bunch of miserable gits, i really dunno.
Well it's not that unusual is it? Sorry, what I'm trying to say is why would people comment? Just a bit puzzled.
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 03-Jul-09 22:31:48
Jade is a lovely name! I love it and fancied it for my DD but DH had a firm favourite that we went with.

Given how Jade Goody has dominated the press for the last few years I would imagine people have funny feelings about it but they will subside.
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 03-Jul-09 22:31:41
I thought people only complimented through politeness/something to say anyway.
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 03-Jul-09 22:29:19
Whatever the reason, if there even is one (I could probably count on one hand the number of people who've commented about ds's name - it's just ordinary), by the time she's a teenager any cultural references, fashions etc will have changed.

It's a nice name - don't worry about itsmile
Add message | Report | Contact poster By Fri 03-Jul-09 22:28:07
tbh I think it's probably been tainted by Jade Goody sad.
Our gorgeous sweet girl is called Jade - we have always loved this name and once we found out we were going to have a girl we decided to call her Jade - we think its a sweet but cool name. Since she has been born (16 months ago), I can count on one hand the times that people said 'what a lovely name'.
While what people thinks about it doesn't concern me too much, I am worried that my little girl will not be happy with her name...I hope to help her be confident enough not to care, but self esteem is somehow scarce when you are a teenager....any thoughts on whether this name is really not liked or is it just my paranoia???
Add your message here
Message
Nickname:
Password:
To post a message you need a valid mumsnet nickname and password. If you have forgotten your nickname, click here for a reminder. If you are not yet a member of mumsnet, you can join here.

Emphasis: To bold a word, surround it with asterisks, so *hello* will display hello. For underline use _ , so _hello_ gives hello. For italics use ^, so ^hello^ gives hello. To strike out a word, surround it with two hyphens either side, so --dog-- gives dog

Links and smileys: To insert a smiley face,  , type [smile] or :)
For a big grin,  , type [grin] or :o
For a wink,  , type [wink]
For a shocked face,  , type [shock]
For an angry face,  , type [angry]
For an embarrassed face,  , type [blush]
For a sad face,  , type [sad] or :(
For an envious face,  , type [envy]
For a sceptical face,  , type [hmm]
For a I have nothing to say on this matter face,  , type [biscuit]

Links The simplest way to insert a link is to enter the link itself, surrounded by [[ and ]]. So if you type [[www.mumsnet.com]], the link will display as http://www.mumsnet.com. If you want your link to display text other than the web address itself, leave a space after the address then add the text before the ]]. So "Look at [[www.mumsnet.com this page]]", would display "Look at this page".
Shortcuts