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If your DC has a name not to everyone's taste...any regrets?(56 Posts)
DS is due in a couple of weeks. We have a short list and a couple of definite favourites. I know they are not really crowd pleasing names which in theory doesn't bother me but I'm freaking out slightly about negative reactions.
DD's name has always received a fairly positive response but none of the options we have for DS will be well liked. Those people who've gone for names that aren't everyone's cup of tea - any regrets? Were people more or less negative than you imagined?
Part of me thinks that a couple of people might pull a face but in no time at all I won't even be able to remember why I was worrying. Surely you just have to go with what you like and not worry about what others think (as long as its not completely ridiculous). Right?
I think that if you are choosing an unusual name, be prepared for negative reactions and also be prepared that, with your hormones going haywire, it may affect you more than you realise.
The first person we told our DD's name to (darling MIL) was outraged by it and that feeling of disapproval always stuck with me - and is still affecting me now.
I think that post birth you are pretty vulnerable and it can hurt you more than you realise. So be ready for it - and be ready to smile through it/tell the naysayers to f off.....
My son has a real name, but very unusual, do not know of any others but there are quite a few variants around that are popular. I feel for him when he has to repeat himself when he introduces himself, and the attempted spellings drive me mad but it doesn't seem to bother him. I will often introduce him as the shortened version if I'm worried about a reaction/ cant be bothered to explain where its from, etc I purposefully gave him a very sensible traditional family mn which he could use as an option when older, but he does suit his name so much and I couldn't and wouldn't want him as anything else!
Oooh Ernest is a fabulous name. Choose that!
I am normally a $*! what people think kind of person and I picked a name that I knew my family and others would not receive well (DP and I could only agree on the one). 5 years on, I still think it was the right name/choice but I do have a twinge every now and then when I see her struggle with people not liking it or saying it correctly. It's all very fine for me/you to have a devil may care attitude but you have to think about how it might affect your child who may not have as thick a skin.
But, I don't really think any of yours fall within that - I like Ernest....although should confess I am a huge Oscar Wilde fan!
Definitely consider the calling it out in a supermarket / non MN environment, what may be fabulous in Islington may mortify you in Darlington.
I like Sonny too, I met one once and he was lovely. Wyatt really does make me think 'Earp", I'm afraid. I also like the suggestion of Emmett.
I agree amandapayne. Someone will always dislike the name - it's why we all call our DCs different things.
I have a very common name, and in one way I actually like the name itself, but don't like being one of five everywhere I go. For DCs I'm not going to be too unusual (names will be top 100 in my area but not top 20) but can understand why people would do that. Excessive popularity would put me off because of my own experience. It takes a very strong and big personality to wear a common name - people always think it is the other way around, but you never forget someone with an unusual name. If you are Sarah number ten, you have to stand out somehow. Difficult.
Go for it OP.
My ds had a quite unusual name (turns out less so now) but we gave him a slightly more common middle name just in case. As it is, everyone got used to it and I am pleased we stood our ground. Agree, it would be a boring world if we all liked the same thing, no reason the names can't be as individual as the child themselves .
I'm not personally keen on Huey (makes me think of the cartoon duck) or Baxter (makes me think of the soup), but the others are really nice.
I come at this as someone who has an unusual name myself. I went through a phase in my early teens where I wasn't that fussed, but generally I love my name. I love the fact that, at work, I could call people and say "Hi, it's X" and everyone knew who it was. I liked that I wasn't one of four in the class. I liked that I always know it's me if I hear my name in a crowd. None of them life changing things, but all positives for me.
My DD's both have fairly unusual names. I have heard them ripped apart on MN, but it has never bothered me. I love them.
I think it's a bit odd that we somehow expect our children's names to be universally adored. Not everyone likes the same clothes as me, or music, or food. Why would they like the same names? The trick, I think, it to try and make sure that you aren't naming your child the name equivalent of the Macarena or puffball skirts (i.e. seemed a good idea at the time...)
My DS has a friend called Wyatt. He's awesome!
My family were outraged when I told them what I intended to name DS
They point blank refused to use it and for a while presumed I was winding them up
They practically begged me not to use t but I stuck to my guns
And now they love it and couldn't see DS being called anything else, it really suits him an is always met with positive comments
I have a Rory and a lot of people really seem to dislike it as a name, but I just love it so I couldn't care less. I really like the way it is such a cute name yet perfectly suited to a grown up like Rory Brember or Rory McIlroy. My only regret is I'd have like to call him Ruairi but we say Rooree and it would have annoyed me that everyone would call him Rory so I thought I'd just go with that..
I like all your names apart from Wyatt - that's Kevin Costner to me ;)
I like Sonny on your list. I don't think that would raise eyebrows but the others would. I have a very unusual name and I absolutely hate it (although my parents think I like it). My experience has been that having an unusual name has been a burden in my life. You're known as the person with the strange name and I truly believe it has affected my confidence throughout life. Even though I hate my first name, it would have been too difficult to change to using my middle name.
I blame the fact that my parents had me at a young age. I don't mean it as a comment about the specific names on your list, but naming DC is not just about your likes - someone has to go through every facet of life (social, professional) with that name and may face challenges because of it along the way.
As you can tell I'm somewhat emotive about it! Not everyone with a "different" name feels this way! Congrats and good luck with the birth!
Re ooer's list of test sentences - my acid test was how would it sound yelled across a supermarket aisle - "XXXXXX, put that down now!" If you would be embarrassed by the pretentiousness of the name in that context, maybe avoid it. Obviously I like the names I gave my DC and think they are OK, but for me, something like Ptolemy might not pass.
But, if I met you and you had given your DC
boring common names, I might think "Oh yawn" because I like unusual names. You can't please everyone and you might as well impress those people who have similar taste to you, IYSWIM.
As someone mentioned earlier, when people are positive about my DC names, they are really positive, swooning over how beautiful and cool they are etc., which is lovely. I would rather have that experience than just avoid a funny look from someone unimaginative.
None whatsoever. A few of mine have eyebrow raising names. I say 'pah' to the lot of them.
They suit their names and the grandparents who were dubious have since come round or shut up about it anyway
I have a sonny.. It's never raised eyebrows.. Not for me to see anyway!
My SIL's clearly didn't like my sons names - but it's just tough as we adore them! I don't particularly like the names they have chosen.
Adore Sonny, Ernest, Huey. But that's just my point of view.
DS has a name that I didn't dislike before he was born, but I didn't love it either. However DH liked it and we couldn't agree on anything else. It is not a particularly 'out there' name but I've yet to hear of another young person with the same name.
Since his arrival, both sets of grandparents have made it clear that they don't like it, and I v rarely get a positive reaction from strangers. He is 4 months old now and I'm still waiting for the name to grow on me although I hope it will do one day.
So my point is, if you absolutely love the name, then hopefully other people's negative reactions won't bother you. But if you are unsure at all then their opinions might make you feel a bit
I'm also due in 2 weeks and was going for Sonny, then dps cousin had her baby this week and named him Sonny so time for a rethink!
My mum did say is that a name? Yes mum dps grandad was called Sonny. Our other name is Joseph but I'm not as keen.
Why on earth should we even expect others to share our tastes?
And, more importantly, liking someone's name has nothing to do with liking a person. In my experience, the person's personality takes over and you start to like the name!
Lastly, we sometimes forget why we name others - so we can identify them and I think we should all be encouraging eath other of MORE name diversity, not less. Makes life more interesting and easier!
No regrets here, but DDs four-letter, two syllable, phonetically plausible (can it be easier than that?) name is another one of those which confuses people when it comes to the pronounciation (a bit like Ibrahim, further up the thread). Admittedly not in common use anymore, it has been used historically in the UK and is in common use in Europe. A typical exchange might go something like this:
"Oh, and what's this little girl's name?"
"Ah, Merry (or Murray, Hairy, Mory anything other than what I just said) that's lovely!"
It really baffles me, I just didn't see it coming. I have colleagues and acquiantainces who still (after nearly 3 years) still manage to go through the whole list of what-it-isn't before allowing me to fill in. I think it is something to do with liking familiarity, so if it is a little different, people quickly find something that it sounds like, and substitute. I regret to say that I see this a fair bit in my job as a teacher, even in the cultural melting pot that is my inner-city primary; some adults (thankfully not teaching staff) insisting on "familiarising" (read anglicising) unfamiliar names, by dint of subtle changes of pronounciation.
Aw, and what's with the Ethel-bashing ? It is the sweetest sounding name, soft and gentle, rolls so nicely off the tongue. It is on my faves list for DC2, but on account of DPs Essex dialect I'm not sure we'll be able to use it (or anything with a "th" in it, for that matter). I'm not being affected or deliberately contrary liking Ethel, I genuinely do.
I didn't give a flying fuck if people disliked my DC's names (and they are somewhat unusual). I loved them and that is all that mattered. Ptooey to all the naysayers.
Might I suggest Emmett to your list aswell? Adore that name and it seems to fit in well with your other choices.
They almost all make me cringe a bit, OP, but folk would get used to them.
Wyatt is cool.
Two of my children have more unusual names. Family members commented that they weren't keen on them when the baby was born, but have grown to like them now. Never got any comments from outside the family, just occassional silence.
I still find it amusing that 12 years on my own mother still can't spell one of them.
Pick a name you like, regardless of anyone else, except your Dh of course.
I never tell others the name we have picked until I announce the birth because I don't want other peoples opinions to sway my choice.
Funnys, Raphael is fabulous. Almost worth having another boy for .
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