To be upset slightly?

(26 Posts)
OhShitFuck Tue 23-Aug-16 07:56:38

It's my birthday today.

So far my DH woke at 7:45 (I've been up with DC since 6:05am)

He went straight to kitchen and made HIS breakfast. Came on lounge and sat down to watch TV. Not even a Happy Birthday.

He told me yesterday he's going out for a ride on his bike this afternoon.

Aibu to feel a little upset at my birthday being forgotten? I'm not expecting lavish gifts. A card would be perfect.

Sassypants82 Tue 23-Aug-16 08:00:43

Yanbu, happy birthday. I hope it improves. flowerscake

Amelie10 Tue 23-Aug-16 08:02:12

Yanbu, happy birthday opcakebrew
Wow he's so inconsiderate to not even wish you. what does he usually do for your birthday? Any chance he has something planned for later.

MairzyDoats Tue 23-Aug-16 08:02:32

Happy birthday!! So has he acknowledged that it's your birthday at all or has he out and out forgotten? Are you one of those people who keep their birthday quiet and hope that others will just remember or have you mentioned it recently? I've got a friend who never talks about her birthday and it drives me mad because it feels like a test every year to see who really loves her... Some of us are disorganised and need reminders! That said, he's your husband and should be making a fuss of you, not buggering off out on his bike!

Hereforthebeer Tue 23-Aug-16 08:02:55

Happy Birthday. Just go out, phone a friend, go and get ready and go out for lunch. Tell him when you are all glammed up that you thought he could look after DC for a couple of hours...

Nicnak2223 Tue 23-Aug-16 08:05:17

cakecakeflowersflowersHAPPY BIRTHDAY flowersflowerscakecake

LTB

Ginslinger Tue 23-Aug-16 08:06:08

Happy Birthday flowers

You need to talk to him. Remind him that it's your birthday and what does he plan to do about that. How would you celebrate his birthday?

woodenmouse Tue 23-Aug-16 08:10:08

Happy birthday cake

I hope he's planned a nice little suprise for later.

SuperHeroesForKids Tue 23-Aug-16 08:14:44

Maybe the afternoon bike ride is a disguise for something else birthday related ? <hopes>

cakewineflowerschocolatestar*HAPPY BIRTHDAY* starchocolateflowerswinecake

OhShitFuck Tue 23-Aug-16 08:27:26

He came in the bedroom after I had a shower and gave me a card.

The bike ride is just that, a ride out for him. Nothing more.

But my mum has called me and invited us to lunch out.

This year he got a card, presents and cake to take to work but a few hours before his birthday my grandfather passed away).

Last year he had balloons, steamers in house, breakfast in bed, DC singing happy birthday to him, gifts, cake to take to work, his fav meal cooked for him and taken to work hot. A meal out after work and the following day (his day off) I gave him money for fuel so he could spend the following day riding.

Neither of us are big on parties, we like the company of our families.

OhShitFuck Tue 23-Aug-16 08:28:22

Thanks for the birthday wishes!

Polska03 Tue 23-Aug-16 08:32:46

Happy Birthday OP flowers cake wine

Trifleorbust Tue 23-Aug-16 08:33:08

Happy birthday cake

I would speak to him and explain that I was feeling neglected. Is he always like this on your birthday?

takesnoprisoners Tue 23-Aug-16 08:37:08

Happy Birthday! flowers Let's hope he has something planned for the evening smile

LippyLiz Tue 23-Aug-16 08:38:05

This used to be me, with the exception of my 40th, Mother's Day and birthdays have always been a let down. I'd push the boat out for shithead DH but it was never reciprocated as much. It's the expectation that you'll be treat as you treat others.

I hope you have a lovely day regardless of him and the way it's started out flowers

bigfriendlygiant Tue 23-Aug-16 08:40:23

Happy Birthday flowers

Can you go out with your mum for lunch and shopping / a walk / whatever you enjoy and leave your DH to it.

OhShitFuck Tue 23-Aug-16 08:44:04

I'm gonna go to the cinema with my DC. Kids club is £2.50pp so won't cost more than £10.

I told him I feel bad and he's now making me breakfast.

Mojito7 Tue 23-Aug-16 08:45:05

Another thread about crap DH's on birthdays! What is wrong with these men? I'm so sorry OP. Presumably he has taken the day off work for your birthday - why would he be going on a bike ride?

Bagina Tue 23-Aug-16 09:32:41

Happy birthday! I've taken steps to avoid this. I can get a bit melancholy on my birthday, so now have a timetable of how I want my day to go, and give it to dh. Starts with croissants and Ferrero Rocher in bed!

CoraPirbright Tue 23-Aug-16 09:38:13

Happy Birthday!

My birthdays are always shit so you really do have my sympathy. I know you have told him that you are feeling bad but have you actually pointed out to him what you do for him v. what he has done for you? Its really crap!!

I like your idea Bagina - I think I will sort out a timetable in the future. I would really like to have a little bit of a fuss* made of me without me asking but that never seems to happen. Sigh. So I had just better get on and make a fuss of myself.

(*by 'fuss' I mean a card and perhaps one of those big toblerones. Thats all - I am not really that demanding but I don't even get that generally!)

Bagina Tue 23-Aug-16 09:52:47

Yes, mines very low key. Please leave me in bed to read my newly downloaded book; at 5 we will have a pub meal and go to the cinema...it's enough!!!

CrikeyPeg Tue 23-Aug-16 10:17:49

Happy birthday!! cake wine flowers

hotdiggedy Tue 23-Aug-16 10:24:47

Do the same when its his birthday next year?

FeedMeAndTellMeImPretty Tue 23-Aug-16 11:41:17

That's shit OP.

Happy Birthday! cake brew flowers

Hope the lunch doesn't include him (go when he's out bike riding!)

How old are your DCs? Next year can you maybe prime them to do something nice for you - it would be a shame for them to grow up without realising the joy that can be had from doing a nice thing for someone else and they sure as hell won't learn that from their dad!

FWIW my DP has booked the day off work for his Bday which I thought was a bit much I like to celebrate as much as the next person, but if it happens to be on the weekend nearest my birthday, or just dinner after work etc that would be fine! Might he be planning something for the weekend instead?

As it is, I have bought DP prezzies, have planned a meal just the two of us the day afterwards (when I don't have my DCs here) and we will probably do something with all the DCs (his and mine) on the day now that he is off work.

I certainly wouldn't just make my own brekkie and leave him to fend for himself while I watch TV, then swan off on my own.

kate33 Tue 23-Aug-16 12:45:46

Happy Birthday!
Make today and tomorrow if you like ALL ABOUT YOU!
Honestly, go right ahead and treat yourself the way you wish your dp would treat you.
It's a learning experience for your dcs! Otherwise they will grow up to not expect anything on their day or more likely not make a fuss of their oh's day. I really think Birthdays should be special. Probably I feel so strongly because my dp hasn't bought me or even made me a card or present for either Christmas or Birthday in the ten years we've been together. He doesn't even help the kids to make anything either. So this year I will be taking matters into my own hands!

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