To want to move as we have no garden?(39 Posts)
We rent a fairly small, first floor, 3 bedroom flat in a lovely area in a great city (not London). We are extremely close to lots of green space including a huge playground, plus shops, library, museums etc. We have two children, a baby and a preschooler. In this area we could only afford a house with garden if we went down to two bedrooms. The other disadvantage would be that the tenancy might be less secure, and the rent would probably be a bit higher. Schools are good, and the preschooler already goes to nursery attached to local school (2 mins away).
I just find having no garden to be a real problem day to day. To get outside we have to go on an outing, albeit a small one,every time. I find it such a pain (literally!) every day getting in and out living on the first floor with the buggy, shopping, changing stuff etc. I have a bad back which doesn't help matters.
DH isn't so bothered by it, but I long for the kids to have a garden to potter around in, and to be able to push the buggy into the house when the baby is asleep! I know we're lucky to have what we have, but AIBU to want to move? Or are gardens overrated?
Thanks all. Yes, I think either staying put or moving out of the area are the best options. No point really moving somewhere smaller around here, even if it would come with a garden.
DH still saying he would probably prefer to stay put - maybe I should show him this thread!
Thanks again for the advice
Move out of area, but check the local schools first to make sure there's an option you could live with.
I would move to get a garden, kids get so much out of them, one of mine was out today pottering around in the sleet!! But then iIwould quite happily squish my family into a broom cupboard if it came with a couple of acres attached!!!
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Jus move then - don't stay for a pre school that he will be leaving anyway soon to go to school! In fact, better to do it now so he can start primary with his mates.
Yup, three year old is a boy. Think he would love a garden tbh which compounds the guilt!
Valium- schools would depend on area we move to, but probably good as they are mostly pretty good in this city. Will have to have a big think!
Do you have boys? Garden is great, thy love kicking a ball!
Oh if it's only pre school then I would move, are the schools ok if you move area?
I'd drop a bedroom if the two dcs can share. A garden is more useful imo.
Thanks again all. Reading these replies I am really reminded of why I want a garden so much, and to have a ground floor entrance. The idea of moving with a baby and 3 year old is exhausting, but perhaps it would be worth it. Would have to either a) move out of this area and move DS preschools or b) drop a bedroom.
Any thoughts on these two options?! Everyone's been so helpful so far
Move - we've just done the same, gone from a large 3 bed flat to a complete wreck of a house
that is probably going to bankrupt me but it is so worth it to be able to park right outside my door, wheel the buggy in and not have to wait for DH to get home to lug the buggy & all the shopping up the stairs as I can't leave the DC alone in the flat while I do that, and we couldn't leave buggies or shopping in the downstairs hallway of the block of flats at all.
We did move away from our area though to get the 3rd bedroom, but as DC isn't in nursery/school yet, it's not so much of a problem.
We have a garden that is ok but too small for big trampoline and lots of running. We have a play house, tiny shed, slide and space for a picnic and paddling pool, however, we're about to make it smaller as we are putting a conservatory on the back. The above will still fit but be more crammed in. We've decided that as most of the year it's raining we may as well use the space all year round.
We looked at bigger gardened houses but for our budget, the houses were smaller as we have 3 double bedrooms and most have tiny 3rd bedrooms.
It's about balance and what works for you. We do live about 2 minutes walk (at toddler pace) to the park though.
We moved last year to a house with a garden. Spent 2k on sorting it out (overgrown, tree stumps, no grass etc). I was heavily pregnant and wanted somewhere to go with the baby. It turns out as the only house on the street with no pets all the local cats use it as a toilet. Don't bury anything, lawn covered in turds all the time. The smell is so foul in the warm weather we can't even open patio doors because of the smell. Complete waste of time and money.
I lived in a flat with no outdoor space up until 6 months ago when I moved into my house with a small garden and I could never live without outdoor space any more. Being able to just wander out the back door and have a cup of tea in the sunshine is blissful. Plus being able to grow my own herbs and other food stuffs is saving us money in the long run and highly rewarding.
With kids your ages I would consider moving. The outdoor space is great at least you will be able to put a few toys out there and maybe a paddling pool even if the garden is small. Are there no 3 bed ground floor flats around your area?
Oh and the other think is that when we moved it seemed as though I had more time as ds would play out and I would get on with cooking/ HW etc - we used to go to the park every single day when we lived in the flat but obviously couldn't get on with any jobs.
I hear you loud and clear. We live in a seventh floor apartment, and even though we have an outdoor space, it's 25 x 25, concrete and holds limited appeal for our toddler. I would love to have a garden, but gardens are nowhere to be found in our city, so we shall have to stick with negotiating umpteen layers, loading up the buggy and schlepping to the park.
I have no garden and I live on a main road.
I lived here before I had children and it is never been a problem.
I have enough room to string two washing lines and I have two sheds, one for bikes and one for camping stuff. The primary school is 1 mile away and the nursery is 2 miles away.
To me your problem is space in the house. However your local community is a big advantage.
You won't need the buggies and changing stuff for ever, it soon passes (too quick, some may say)
I say hang in there.
Plus you can get a trampoline and they are FANTASTIC at keeping the kids entertained, it was the best thing we ever bought.
We have a 100ft garden which was lovingly looked after for 20 years by the previous owner.
I'm trying my best not to kill everything in it but nothing beats she sheer joy of harvesting the raspberries and blackberries last summer while my son ran round making camps and splashing about in the paddling pool on the one hot day we had (!)
Ok, I'm painting an idealised picture but I can't even contemplate not having a garden. It's good for the soul and is a lifesaver when the weather gets better as I just leave the back door open and the DCs can run in and out.
Having said that, we moved from a small 2 bed to a larger 3 bed so I can understand the need for more inside space.
We didn't have a garden for the first 6 years of ds's life (first floor flat) then we moved and now have one and tbh looking back things would have been SO much easier with one, I'm not sure how we managed without one. Life is just easier with garden ime
It's not just garden, which are work for how much they are used.
It's losing lugging stuff upstairs.
It's losing the stress of upstairs/downstairs hearing the DCs jumping about.
It's losing feeling embarrassed if DCs decide to throw a tantrum in the downstairs hall or trail mud in to said hall.
A house, however small is your space.
A garden however tiny is your space. If the DCs want to paint or shoot each other with water pistols or have a sandpit they can.
I'm lucky we have a big garden with a swing and a trampoline, but when they were small the DDs mostly rode a digger round and played with their water table just outside the kitchen.
Thanks v much for the replies - quite a mixed bag! Think I have decided to have a look at a 2 bed house with garden to rent nearby, just to see what the comparison is.
Thing is - then if the baby and preschooler don't sleep well together, we're a bit stuck!
Move! We moved from a large Victorian flat on the edges of a park, with sea views to a house in a village, but with a garden AND a shed. I love it. You can't beat having breakfast, lunch and dinner outside when the weather lets you and the kids are always outside.
My husband still misses the view, I don't at all. Nor do I miss the size. Not sharing my front door with others is priceless, as is parking my car on my driveway!
We rent and have a trampoline, swing, wooden climbing frame with a slide etc so there are landlords that let you use the garden how you want.
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