I will try to keep it brief.
Dbil has 1 Ds aged 17 months. He is fantastic with this child and loves him to bits.
His ds's mother is a - God, I can't even think of a word for her. She is utterly vile.
She abuses dbil physically and verbally. He has never raised so much as an eyebrow back.
She has a dd from a previous relationship who was taken into care but returned to her when ss realised what a great guy dbil is. He got her flat in order, got her in order as much as he could, ensured she visited her dd when she was meant to etc. he cared for her dd like she was his own.
She doesn't care two hoots about either of her children. The dd is always palmed off on some relative or another, the ds is always with dbil. And I mean always. He does everything. Gets up in the night with the kids, cooks, cleans, washes, irons, shops, sorts out bills etc. she does nothing but go out and see her mates, gets pissed and sees other men.
She spends no time with her son. When he cries, she calls dbil. She won't pick him up, won't comfort him, wont clean him up, wash him or his clothes, won't change his happy, won't take him anywhere.
He has recently left her, taking his ds with him. She has decided that she wants to see the ds - when its convenient and she has nothing better to do. So, dbil took ds round to see her and said that he was popping out for an hour and left. She ran out with the child as he was driving away, put the child - no shoes or coat - ON THE PAVEMENT - and walked back into the house.
Dbil looked in the rear view mirror, saw her going in and his ds crawling up the pavement alongside the road. How the hell could anyone do that to a child?? 
Since then, she has threatened to leave the child alone in hs buggy on the high street and walk away if dbil did not come and take him immediately as she "could not cope". Bollocks. She wanted to go and met her new bloke in a pub, and couldn't do that with her ds.
She is a complete bitch and should not have responsibility for a fly, let alone 2 children.
I really really want to say something to her - but should I just keep my nose out?
AIBU?
To want to give this bitch a piece of my mind?
QueenOfCats · 05/02/2013 23:27
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Oh I have no idea what I would actually say! I'm just so cross
Hw dare anyone treat another person like this? Treat their own child like this? She's like something off Jeremy Kyle this one.
I'd just like to say SOMETHING!
Dbil would like to have both kids - he wants his ds to grow up with his sister, but her family would never allow it, they won't even let the dds biological father near her.
Bloody hell dizzy - your poor brother 
I suppose that no matter what I say or do, she won't behave any differently.
DP and I are doing our best to support dbil, but sometimes we get frustrated with him too, because for some reason, despite what this awful trollop has done to him and their son, he won't walk away from her.
And his ds is such a lovely little boy, he really is. But even at his age, when he gets cross he is violent. He will smash things, hit things, and bang his head on the wall. It's no wonder really.
If dbil keeps putting him in the same situation, I can't help but wonder what he will be like in 5 years time.
It's just so bloomin' sad.
Please ring social services. Your brother is being a prat, he is also putting his feelings before his ds. It's clearly not that he wants ds to have a relation with the selfish bitch, because why on earth would that be beneficial to the boy? Brother needs to separate what he wants from what's good for his son. He needs a good period of separation from her. Maybe ss could spell out the harm being done to his son. I've found in situations involving kids that parents can see harm being done to the child and just use it as point scoring in a dramatic kind of way (he said, she said type of thing) but they actually don't sit and think of the reality for the child, the fact that just because a child is a child, it doesn't mean they aren't a human with their own feelings. This will have lasting damage on his boy. Imagine the two people who are supposed to love you most fighting over who has to be with you most and who should have to stay with you now. And imagine the fear when the child understands threats to dump him in the street alone. Awful.
Take a stand OP, that child needs you. His parents are too wrapped up in their drama to see that this boy's life is being damaged before it's even had a chance to begin.
Hope this isn't too waffling... I'm a waffler.
She sounds ill to me. This is not normal behaviour. She needs help - but first and foremost the child needs to be protected.
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