Mumsnet Talk

nearly as bad as the letters home from school informing us that there are "visitors" in class hahaha (nits) I always want to go and ask them who they are and how long they are staying

And one child I looked after called it shit, but he was from Reading

<When I went for my scan the sonographer said that my baby had 'boy parts'>

Mine said 'I think I can see an indication of some blue'. If it hadn't been a very obvious willy, I might have been confused...

Our school's whole Keeping Children Safe policy is based on children using proper words from the very beginning. Apparently it's a real issue in child protection cases as so much confusing language is used.

They have all been taught penis, vagina, anus and testicles.

This has resulted in DS1 referring to his peanut and his tentacles however, so not entirely sure it's helped.

I was really surprised at how many parents objected to this approach and were reluctant to use the words themselves.

'Poo' is the least of their worries!

nokidshere I shared a bath with DD yesterday only to find that we had also been joined by a 'visitor'.

Unfortunately said visitor was a 6 inch 'bowel movement'

<When I went for my scan the sonographer said that my baby had 'boy parts'>

Mine said 'extra parts'. I found that hilarious and disturbing in equal measures.

I think I might teach DS-to-be it's a peanut and tentacles, just for the lolz. I've already taught DD the polite Zulu slang for her bits (translates as 'insect', WTF), because that is what I was taught they were called when I was little.

Loving peanut & tentacles

I told DD that her baby brother had a penis. DH went like this so I've reverted to calling it a willy for the moment. Even he can't cope!

DS's nursery use the abbreviation 'BM' when marking on his notes whether he had a wet or dirty nappy. DH was trying to work out what it meant and eventually came up with 'Barry Manilow'

Triple that's absolutely hilarious, really made me laugh.

I work in a Childcare centre and we would say poo, and also use correct anatomical names for genitalia. I am in Australia, so maybe less polite in general?

Yes "poop" is revolting and twee and American. Say poo FFS. It's like saying "trump" instead of fart.

YouWithTheFace - what is the Zulu polite slang for fanny? And willy, for that matter.

Yes "poop" is revolting and twee and American. Say poo FFS. It's like saying "trump" instead of fart.

I say trump

I didn't know trump was American. I find it a rather funny word

It's a pump not a trump in our family as that's what it was called when I was wee.

I tried to explain to DS1 about wind when he was 2 and a bit, he then started announcing that he was "about to do some wind" or just "I'm winding".

Is it considered rude to say fart then? That's what I've taught 2.5yo DD, but MiL looked horrified when DD merrily said she'd farted last night

Lol at carabos - the mind boggles about where you work!

I think poo or poop are both ridiculously babyish words. I can't think of anything better, though. Faeces is the closest to a genuine grown up word but even i think it sounds poncy. Muck, maybe?

DSS2 is Doctor Who obsessed and insists on his DW magazine every week (stay with me here). We went to visit DMIL last year and when we were in the car from the train station to MIL's house, DSS2 (then 5) started telling his GM enthusiastically that "this week's DW magazine comes with Ood Testicles!" (it was an Ood tentacle mask)

Pause, followed by screaming, crying laughter by DP, DMIL, DSS1 and me over which you could only just hear DSS2 crying "It's not funny!!!". DP said it was all he do to keep the car straight.

It even refers to 'poo' in medicine leaflets so they are being ridiculous!

Seriously?! Tail as a term for penis?! Trump and pump for fart?! And nurseries being afraid to say poo (can't stand pooh either!)?! Wtf is going on?!

I work in a pre-school I'm happy to say 'poo' when talking but I do tend to write 'soiled' when writing about a nappy/clothing change in the contact book - I'm not sure why.

I prefer to use anatomical terms for body parts but there are other staff who disapprove and think that parents will disapprove to so I tend to avoid any names unless I have heard the child refer to a part themselves then I use what they use.

I think nurseries ought to use the vernacular - poo, wee, willy, mum(my), dad(dy) etc. It is very important for children to know the vernacular - plenty of time for anatomical correctness and euphemism.

And one child I looked after called it shit, but he was from Reading

Actually, genuinely, crying at that!

When I were a lass back in the dark ages a fart was a pump and a poo was a pap.
Poo is a relatively recent addition to the vocabulary-the polite term was 'number two'