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to be drunk in charge of DC?

(43 Posts)
Flojobunny Mon 14-Jan-13 19:20:56

Maybe I should have put this in lone parent?
There was a time I wouldn't dream of this.
But if you have seen my other thread, maybe you'd understand.
AIBU to drink in sole charge of DD?

Flojobunny Tue 15-Jan-13 22:18:43

Thankyou so much. It took some doing to walk through the front door and ask for help but I only wish I'd done it ages ago now.

freeandhappy Tue 15-Jan-13 19:51:38

Good for you.

YorkshireDeb Tue 15-Jan-13 19:39:28

Fantastic news! You're such a strong person - you should be very proud of yourself. X

thegreylady Tue 15-Jan-13 18:35:20

Well done you smile

Flojobunny Tue 15-Jan-13 13:04:01

I have enrolled on a self esteem and assertiveness course, I am hoping that will help.

thegreylady Tue 15-Jan-13 08:48:29

Well done you are taking back control of your situation. We are all here with you and I am sure you will be able to get some rl help too.

Peanutbutterfingers Tue 15-Jan-13 08:40:14

Well done smile

What's your plan for today? What little step are you going to take to move forward?

AlienReflux Tue 15-Jan-13 04:22:38

glad you're hanging in there love. things ARE going to get better, you're going to need strength and support, keep posting we will be here to listen.

Flojobunny Tue 15-Jan-13 00:21:55

I stopped drinking and fell asleep on the sofa for a couple of hours.Probably means I'll be wide awake all night and feeling rough by the morning but DD will go to nursery and I will decide how I am going to deal with the mess that is my life.

I know it probably feels like the answer right now but it's not. Alcohol will just make you feel more shitty.

splashymcsplash Tue 15-Jan-13 00:09:10

Hugs flojo.

You are in a difficult situation now. Being a single mum is hard. These things will pass though. Right now you are clearly depressed which is stopping you from seeing this. As others have said please try to make contact with Samaritans.

Has your gp referred you for talking therapy? It can be very helpful in your situation. Your gp may also be able to refer you to the crisis resolution team who can provide intensive input. Tell him how bad you are feeling, including what you have told us about contemplating suicide.

Do you have any support from friends or family? Don't be afraid to ask for it.

As others have said, drinking won't make things better. You are taking risks by drinking -both to yourself and dd.

Please take care of yourself.

OliviaPeacein2013Mumsnet (MNHQ) Mon 14-Jan-13 22:43:15

Hi there Flojobunny
So sorry to read that you are going through this.
Do let us know if you'd like us to move this thread to our mental health topic?
There is a lot of support here on MN and also indeed in RL guide here
Very best to you
MNHQ

thegreylady Mon 14-Jan-13 22:17:34

Phone someone girl now please for your little girl. She needs you so much and you are her world. Take baby steps and get help. You can do this,just get some help and one day soon you will have your boy back.

Peanutbutterfingers Mon 14-Jan-13 21:28:19

Flojo please call Samaritans or mind

I understand completely where you are and the temptation to drink to oblivion. But if you're not used to drinking vodka is going to make you ill. And god forbid worse.

DS needs you to get well. Dd needs you to keep her safe.

You need expert help

You've been very brave, but this is the point you have to decide that things ARE going to get better- and you need to shout and shout and shout for help.

And don't give in to oblivion

We're with you, we're rooting for you, but we can't give you the professional help you need to get well and get DS back with his lovely mum who loves him x

Flojobunny Mon 14-Jan-13 21:20:58

No my dad has done enough for today, he has my mum to look after. I feel guilty enough for putting on him.
squeaky she has no father, just me, else she wouldn't be here and i'd probably be found swinging from the nearest tree.

somedayma Mon 14-Jan-13 21:14:26

sad I read your other thread and can't imagine how you feel. Getting hammered would be tempting (I've had a much less shit day than you but still want to reach for the wine) but I don't have kids (that's not an attack on you, just an acknowledgement of how much more difficult this situation is for you) and I know logically getting drunk won't help at all. I hope you feel less hopeless soon. Could your dad come round?

squeakytoy Mon 14-Jan-13 21:13:52

If you need to get through the night by getting obliterated on alcohol, take your daughter to her father too first. I can see you are having a rough time, but this is not the way to get it solved is it?

Your daughter is the one you should be putting first tonight. Her brother is not there, so you really cannot possibly think that getting pissed is remotely sensible.

Flojobunny Mon 14-Jan-13 21:08:58

Pure I have no alcohol issues. I can count on one hand the number of times I had one drink in 2012. But I need to get through the night. I'm borderline now but feel like its not enough. I don't think all the vodka in the world will be enough.

McNewPants2013 Mon 14-Jan-13 19:57:48

just to add, don't be so hard on yourself xxxxxx

McNewPants2013 Mon 14-Jan-13 19:55:21

I don't think vodka is the key here. I think you may benefit from a nice long soak in the bath and to sit with a nice cup of tea.

In the short term, i think it will be the best for your son to live with his father until you can get some proper help and support.

Flo, the way you're feeling today the last thing you need is alcohol.

Phone your Dad, or the Samaritans.

Flo, I am concerned for you. The clinic you mention on the other thread, is most commonly known for addiction rehab... I have a friend who used to work there, she is a psychiatrist, mainly involved with getting alcoholics dried up.

Alcohol is a depressant as you know, and drinking a lot is not going to do you much good in terms of your feeling of coping. I know today is a shit day for you, but getting drunk in sole charge of your dd is not the answer.

BumpingFuglies Mon 14-Jan-13 19:46:22

Ah, Flo you've had a hell of a time. Have a couple but if you think you won't be able to stop, don't start. The others are right about Samaritans - it can really help x

Jomato Mon 14-Jan-13 19:44:00

If your dad has been great today I'm sure he would be now I you called him and told him how bad you are feeling. It sounds like having a drink would turn to being drunk quite quickly and that is just going to make you feel worse. I think ringing the Samaritans would be a good option if you really feel you can't ask for more help from family.

AlienReflux Mon 14-Jan-13 19:36:46

it's a worry when you say drink to oblivion yes. what if your daughter needed you? Don't get me wrong,I sympathise, but if your drinking is that bad, you're putting her, and custody if her in danger.

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