to ask why should I pay for someone else's mum's care home?

(328 Posts)
Ilovexmastime Fri 04-Jan-13 12:29:45

I was just reading my DM's copy of The Express (I like to raise my blood pressure every so often) and came across this article: www.express.co.uk/posts/view/368525

It is an article about spending money that we give to the EU on old age care. There is a case study bit in it where a woman is complaining that they had to sell her mum's £140,000 bungalow to pay her £100,000 costs in a care home.

Am I missing something here? Why should I, as a taxpayer, pay for her mum's care home when she has enough money to cover it herself? It wasn't like her mother was ever going to leave the care home and move back home, so why not sell it?

AnyaKnowIt Fri 04-Jan-13 12:31:30

Yeah but I'm guessing that the woman was a taxpayer who was paying for your education.

Swings and roundabouts...

jessjessjess Fri 04-Jan-13 12:31:33

Tell you what. I'll stop paying for your medical treatment, police, roads and schools and then we'll talk, mmmkay?

sooperdooper Fri 04-Jan-13 12:33:22

I agree with you, if someone has the funds available, either in cash or through the sale of a house then yes, they should sell the property and pay what needs to be paid - I don't see why she sees the money as 'going to the state' - it wasn't, it was going towards her mums care!!

PandaNot Fri 04-Jan-13 12:34:28

Because one day someone else will be paying for yours? hmm

Lilithmoon Fri 04-Jan-13 12:36:38

I was just reading my DM's copy of The Express (I like to raise my blood pressure every so often) and came across this article: www.express.co.uk/posts/view/368525

It is an article about spending money that we give to the EU on cancer care. There is a case study bit in it where a woman is complaining that they had to sell her mum's £140,000 bungalow to pay her £100,000 costs in a hospital.

Am I missing something here? Why should I, as a taxpayer, pay for her mum's medical treatment when she has enough money to cover it herself? It wasn't like her mother was ever going to leave the hospital and move back home, so why not sell it?

Alisvolatpropiis Fri 04-Jan-13 12:37:55

biscuit

Lovely attitude you have there OP. YABU.

ChippingInLovesChristmasLights Fri 04-Jan-13 12:38:25

So - there are two elderly men, one has a couple of (grown) children, he's worked all his life and bought a home, hoping that his children will benefit when he dies - the other has partied his whole life, now they both need homes. The 'sensible' one is now punished for being sensible. Not really that fair is it?

DameMargotFountain Fri 04-Jan-13 12:40:21

too right OP

we should only get out what we've paid in...how many children do you have being state educated and needed medical care <gets out clipboard>

Hammy02 Fri 04-Jan-13 12:41:09

YY chipping

cocoachannel Fri 04-Jan-13 12:41:12

Because we live in a welfare state which is being systematically broken down enough as it is without further cuts to social care, please God.

Hammy02 Fri 04-Jan-13 12:42:57

May as well just blow all the money while alive if it is going to the state when we die.

Megatron Fri 04-Jan-13 12:45:53

Gosh, what a lovely way to think.

DH's nan never worked a day in her life, lived in the same council house for 50 years, new roof, kitchen, etc etc you get the picture.

She is now in a very nice care home (great place, happy that she's being taken care of). My next door neighbour who has worked all her life, has just had to sell her very small house to be in the same care home, though sadly it won't cover her care for very long so god knows what will happen then.

Hi Chipping <waves>

InExitCelsisDeo Fri 04-Jan-13 12:46:02

I do sometimes worry about this situation, but it comes down to what Chipping wrote. My Dad may need to go into a care home some time soon, and if so we would have to sell his house to pay for it, but I have always secretly banked on the house as my inheritance. I know I have no right to it, but my parents were careful all there lives and a have a lovely home to show for it. However they, or me, will be the huge beneficiaries of the increase in house prices over the past 40 years, which is probably never going to be repeated.

SantasENormaSnob Fri 04-Jan-13 12:49:42

Exactly what chipping said.

Cantbelieveitsnotbutter Fri 04-Jan-13 12:51:54

At the moment there's alot if people who can't buy their own properties. So when they are old what will they have to sell to pay for their care?

Iggly Fri 04-Jan-13 12:52:25

YABU

You are not paying. You contribute to the goverment purse and they then redistribute it. We all pay, it's a collective thing.

Go live somewhere with no welfare provision or state provision if you don't like it.

Iggly Fri 04-Jan-13 12:53:44

No chipping. What if the party goer worked hard, paid taxes and contributed to society? Whereas the sensible one only cared about his own?

BumpingFuglies Fri 04-Jan-13 12:57:48

What a fucking attitude. Why should I pay my taxes so that you can have free NHS treatment?

Here OP, have a tax-payer funded biscuit

perceptionreality Fri 04-Jan-13 12:59:20

hmm biscuit

Ilovexmastime Fri 04-Jan-13 13:02:09

Sorry, should have been clearer... I have absolutely NO problem with paying for someone's mum to go in a care home if they have no money, it's just that I don't see why I should pay just so that their kids can inherit their house. Like sooper said, the money wasn't going to the state, it was going to pay for looking after her mum.
I can see that there is a problem with regards to the situation chipping described, ie punishing someone for being good, though. Maybe I just got too riled up over the woman's attitude. It seemed to me to be saying, why should I pay for my mum's care when the state could pay and then I get to keep the £140,000.

Ooo, I've never been flamed before, it's making me shake.

RedHelenB Fri 04-Jan-13 13:03:20

The council tax payers will pay for your next door neighbour too megatron so she won't be kicked out of her care home.

Ilovexmastime Fri 04-Jan-13 13:03:57

I also see that a lot of posters are comparing this to education, NHS etc. I hadn't really thought about it that way. I shall go away and think a bit more....

Brideandgloom Fri 04-Jan-13 13:09:17

I kind of get where you're coming from. My gran-in-law (iyswim) is in a home but paid for by the state. She has a house which is worth a lot of money (over 500K) and her kids are working out how to legally keep the house and not pay for her care so that they still get the cash on her death.
That is the kind of attitude that stinks I think, But..... I do think you misunderstand the whole contributing to the general purse through taxes which then gets shared out through education etc.

I can guarantee my dd's education costs the state more than my grans nursing home.

YABU, imo.

Grr! This really annoys me. People who are frugal and look after their money should be able to use that money for little extras and luxuries, not the basics that the profligate or 'never worked a day in their life' brigade get for nothing.

It isn't fair.

I don't give a stuff about an inheritance if my dad ever needs to go into a home, but I would like to think that proceeds from selling his house would be spend on extras to make his life more pleasant and enjoyable, not just paying the basic care home fees so that he could end up worse off than someone with no savings. sad

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