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to think this is not a present..

(55 Posts)
mamamibbo Thu 03-Jan-13 21:05:00

its a 'big' birthday mid january, ive been after a tablet for ages, dh didnt get me a xmas present because i was getting a big birthday present ..

hes just told me i can upgrade my phone contract in february and get a tablet as the free gift in that with my new phone (that'll probably sell since i like my phone) and hes going to do the same so we can both have tablet and the laptop can be for my business (that was my idea, we only have one computer and i need it at night when he wants to use it sometimes)

so now im getting what i asked for, 3 weeks late so thats my present sorted?

what do you reckon?

JeezyOrangePips Thu 03-Jan-13 21:08:04

If he is getting one too is that his birthday present?

JeezyOrangePips Thu 03-Jan-13 21:08:56

Actually make that his birthday plus Xmas 2013...

mamamibbo Thu 03-Jan-13 21:09:28

his birthday is in october, i bought him a sat nav from me and a greenhouse from the kids

mamamibbo Thu 03-Jan-13 21:10:08

and i bought him £90 of football stuff from xmas from us all

CloudsAndTrees Thu 03-Jan-13 21:10:39

Do you have to pay any extra on your contract to get the tablet and new phone, and is he going to pay it?

Personally, I wouldn't consider an upgrade a birthday present unless it was costing a lot to get a new phone I really wanted. Especially if my DH was getting the same and would then expect a birthday present later in the year.

CloudsAndTrees Thu 03-Jan-13 21:11:44

And he owes you a separate Christmas present if your birthday present is going to be a freebie.

KirstyJC Thu 03-Jan-13 21:12:03

Tightarse! No way a freebie you have to apply for yourself is a present (and presumably you have to pay more for if it's an upgrade?)

Laugh at him, and then say "Very funny - I can't wait to see what you have ACTUALLY got me now, given that this is so obviously taking the piss....."

No way this counts as a present!

mamamibbo Thu 03-Jan-13 21:12:07

nope, itthe exact same price as the contract i have now and all bills are paid from the family pot

itsmineitsmine Thu 03-Jan-13 21:12:37

We share finances in this house and have no separate money so i dont really 'get' the idea of spending money and saying something is from one person for birthday, christmas or whatever.

JeezyOrangePips Thu 03-Jan-13 21:12:51

You are missing my point. If he thinks that's a birthday plus Xmas gift for you, it should have the same value for him. So you don't need to buy him a gift till October 2014 in that case.

See what he thinks of that idea.

No I wouldn't count an upgrade as a birthday present unless it's going to cost a lot more and he's going to pay for it.
Also hmm about him getting a tablet on your birthday too.
Maybe he has other plans?

Arisbottle Thu 03-Jan-13 21:13:06

You wanted a tablet and you are getting one , can't see the problem

poozlepants Thu 03-Jan-13 21:16:46

Fair enough if it's a good deal on the tablets and it's the one you want but it's not a proper present.

HoneyDragon Thu 03-Jan-13 21:16:59

I got a upgraded phone for my birthday. But as I hammerd down our bill two years ago it meant an increase which dh is paying for.

I'd be a peed off if dh got himself a tablet too and didn't at least get a token gift.

HollaAtMeBaby Thu 03-Jan-13 21:18:11

Great! Now that you're getting the tablet free, what do you want for your combined big birthday and Christmas present? Better give your DH as much notic as possible grin

HollyBerryBush Thu 03-Jan-13 21:19:16

I wouldnt have an issue with that - but I am penny wise and pound concious - I do not see the point of spending money and lining corporate pockets if things can be acquired more cheaply by biding your time.

redskyatnight Thu 03-Jan-13 21:22:50

Depends how big a deal you set by presents. I'd be perfectly happy with his suggestion - sounds sensible and saves (your family) money.

happynewmind Thu 03-Jan-13 21:25:09

Its great you can get the tablet free.

But he owes you a birthday present and a Christmas one seeing the tablet will be free.

Did he even get you a token present at Christmas?

Startail Thu 03-Jan-13 21:26:15

Shared finances here so seems fine to me.
And I know a nice restaurant to spend the money saved in.

mamamibbo Thu 03-Jan-13 21:27:22

i got nothing, not even a box of chocs sad

StupidFlanders Thu 03-Jan-13 21:28:24

That would piss me off. I would expect an Xmas present as an absolute minimum.
I would point out that he was actually spending nothing on Xmas and bday and you're not even keeping the new phone!
Normally I'd be fine with it of we had discussed not giving presents/ spending money but he implied he was saving for something big!

HoneyDragon Thu 03-Jan-13 21:52:14

See if I have stated no presents I am fine with no presents.

If I need something and it is to be a present it should be given as a present.

I am frugal too and would much prefer to get the tablet this way, but I would expect my dh to think "fuck, that's a bit unair on HD as I'm getting one too and she got no Xmas gift" and come up with something, nothing expensive, but something.

I don't expect gifts and when we can't afford them we don't do them, but I think your dh is being a bit lazy on this one.

DrinkFeckArseGirls Thu 03-Jan-13 21:57:26

I don't see why you're assuming this is your gift, unless he said so.

The laziness/thoughtlessness would bother me. How would he feel if you'd done this to him?

I'm assuming you have family finances, and then you both have money you spend on yourselves/presents from you, etc? If so, tell him that, as you're now getting the tablet for free and that is no longer your joint christmas/birthday present, you'd like a cheque for the amount the tablet would have cost, please. And go shopping grin.

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