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To expect my 3 yr old to go to sleep when we take him to bed?

(36 Posts)
miniegg1980 Mon 31-Dec-12 21:01:12

I know this should be under sleep but I need as much advice as possible! Our ds has a nap of 1 1/2 - 2 hours sleep after lunch, but people keep telling us we need to drop it now he's 3. So we're starting to slowly decrease it which he hates and sometimes screams that he wants to sleep longer.....but now it's taking him longer to get to sleep at night. He goes to bed at 7 has a couple of stories and i'm normally sitting with a cup of tea by 7.30. But for the past 2 weeks we've had every excuse for him to get up again. Tonight we've had a rougue sock, a piece of dodgy looking paper, a nappy, a straggly bit of duvet and now his brothers crying. He'll be up at 6 in the morning and he looks like shit.

Don't know whether to laugh or cry! Please any help?

miniegg1980 Mon 31-Dec-12 21:59:15

I just want to do what's best for him.

Iggly normally the boy is outside but the awful weather and a waterlogged garden/flooded area hasn't helped recently. We live in a bungalow and running from one end to the other must cover some milage?!!

maternityleavemum Mon 31-Dec-12 22:01:01

With my son I had to be strict with him at night cos he would get up for so many silly things -duvet not straight etc that he went to sleep really late. I stopped this behaviour by threatening to take stuff away the next day or no TV next day etc. Then when he was actually going to sleep at 7pm I shortened his naps in the day.

Think it's a case of having him up later at night if he has long naps or get him going to bed early with shorter naps

TBH never heard of a child with long naps that goes to be early too- too good to be true I suppose!

Softlysoftly Mon 31-Dec-12 22:06:58

If he was napping and sleeping I'm not sure why you would stop it. DD1 can't nap or she won't sleep but I know my friends boy 2 months older (both3) sleeps 1.5hrs in the day and the same as her at night.

Just go with what works for you.

For the 5am waking he's 3 you can tell him! Doesn't matter if he's up you don't have to be. Give him one of those light up clocks and he stays in bed/bedroom with books and toys until it lights up at 7.

If DD1 wakes early (shes in my bed) I have drink & raisins on the side table so she helps herself on waking and logs into Netflix cartoons on
The iPad for an hour blush

Iggly Mon 31-Dec-12 22:09:13

If he's like my ds then probably not enough grin

When ds goes to soft play <shudders> he's nowhere near as exercised as when we go outside, despite running about like a loon. We've been sticking him in super thick waterproofs and wellies to splash in massive squelchy puddles in the park. It makes such a difference to get him out.

Can you just make bedtime a bit later for him? We keep ds in bed by sitting with him for a bit, leaving him and coming back after 5-10 mins or longer until he sleeps.

Iggly Mon 31-Dec-12 22:10:16

As for early wakings, DS gets up himself turns his light on, gets his potty and plays with his toys until we come and get him.

BigBoPeep Mon 31-Dec-12 22:10:28

people are all different, it's only logical that kids are too so who's to say your son doesn't need a 2hr nap?

Myself, I could do with 10pm-8am and an hour's nap after lunch too. Don't often get it, but that'd be ideal grin Others might get the horrors at spending 11hrs of every 24 asleep though!

charlottehere Mon 31-Dec-12 22:19:51

My 3 year old went to bed at 730 and is now awake downstairs which is common practise here. hmm Grrr. i have 3 others too, one being Ds who is 5 weeks. should know how to do it by now [

larks35 Mon 31-Dec-12 22:22:32

Well the conflicting advice on here just goes to show why they don't "come with a manual"!

Every child is different. My DS still sometimes needs a nap in the afternoon and he is very nearly 4. It can affect his bedtime a bit if he doesn't nap til late in the afternoon/evening but if he needs it then I feel it is better for him to have it, as he is much happier after.

I'm finding that my DS and DD (8mo) are both sleeping a lot more at the moment - I put it down to the weather, time of year and usual growing needs. I also thank the gods for it, as I need more too!

Do you still put him to bed for the nap? I found it better to let DS nap on the sofa as then he would wake after having a refresher nap rather than a full sleep cycle. That might help but hey, you and your DS know what he needs and don't feel you have to listen to everyone else's advice.

halcyondays Tue 01-Jan-13 13:09:58

Neither of mine ever napped after they turned two, much though I would have liked them too,but they still didn't settle at night. He probably still needs the nap.

If he normallysettles easily at bedtime, and it's just been for the last two weeks, could it be down to Xmas excitement/change in routine?

PenelopePipPop Tue 01-Jan-13 13:33:27

There isn't a right answer but DD (just over 2.5) has recently dropped her nap and is now settling much better at night. The transition took about a month and what you describe does sound familiar

Things that helped...
Lie-ins - she has finally dropped it properly over the holidays whilst we've been able to sleep in, but we'll see what happens when she is back at her CM next week.
Keeping her awake all day to see what happened.
Letting her have a lamp on by her bed to look at books by so she could settle herself off - and so she could get up and play by herself even if it was still dark when she woke.
Daily fresh air, even if it is just a squelch in muddy puddles. I think going from warm to cold and back again feels nice even if they don't go far.

BsshBossh Tue 01-Jan-13 16:09:22

Has Christmas worn him out? My 4 yo has always settled and slept well but over Christmas she's resisted sleep more at bedtime. She's getting back to settling well again now. I blame the festive excitements!

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