to be upset with Nursery for letting my 18 month old play out in this weather when she's been in hospital 3 times this year with pneumonia and breathing difficulties

(68 Posts)
designergirl Thu 22-Nov-12 16:23:24

I just went to pick my daughter up, it's really windy, cold and starting to rain and she was playing outside as were all the other children her age. She has been in hospital 3 times this year with pneumonia and breathing difficulties, in February,July and September. I wouldn't let her play out in this weather at home and I was so upset with the staff that I shouted at them. I wrote in her book that she has a hat, mittens and scarf but she didn't have any of them on, and I saw her fall over. I think the wind blew her over but she might have just fallen over.Am I being unreasonable?
I know OFSTED require them to play outside and generally I don't mind her playing out. I just think it's a bit lacking in common sense to let her play out in this awful weather. The wind is so strong it's just blown an empty hanging basket all the way down our street.

Sirzy Thu 22-Nov-12 16:39:11

I think you need to trust the nursery to make a judgement on when the weather is ok to take children outside.

Our nursey have an undercover outdoor area that is used no matter what the weather, when it's really windy or wet they don't let them out to the playground or sensory area as they are more exposed.

Virus' cause illnesses not wind and rain.
<runs away>

CanIHaveAPetGiraffePlease Thu 22-Nov-12 16:39:34

I would apologise tomorrow morning for shouting if I were you. Not a nice way to treat people who have had your daughter all morning and best to restore good communications with them.

designergirl Thu 22-Nov-12 16:40:26

I didn't mean to shout and I don't normally. I just felt so worried I lost it blush

Sirzy Thu 22-Nov-12 16:40:33

Why do you need to put it in her book often? Surely when they have been told they don't need reminding?

designergirl Thu 22-Nov-12 16:41:02

Yes I was planning to, Giraffe

RobinSparkles Thu 22-Nov-12 16:41:58

Pneumonia isn't caused by being outside though. It's caused by viruses and bacteria, as you probably know.

She's probably better off outside than inside in close proximity to other snotty children, in a stuffy central heated room where germs breed!

designergirl Thu 22-Nov-12 16:42:08

Each time she has been in hospital I have written it in her book.

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos Thu 22-Nov-12 16:42:34

that's what I'm wondering, is it fair enough for me not to want her to play out in such weather.

Yes, it is fair enough for you to not want her to play out in this weather. Personally, I would disagree with you (based on the weather in the SE today) but your child, you get to choose.

Except when you aren't the one looking after her. While its ok for you to not want her outside, its not fair enough for you to think that nursery should know that, and then do what you want. What if all the other parents want their children outside? What if there's really no good reason for her not to be outside? You cannot leave your child in nursery care and them dictate their day to them.

If you want that level of choice about what your child does each day, the only thing you can do is hire a nanny. Even a childminder will probably have other children to consider, so all you can do is look after your child yourself, or get a nanny.

It is better for her to be outdoors in the fresh air than indoors with central heating brewing all those bugs...

WorraLiberty Thu 22-Nov-12 16:44:50

I think you'd got through 18 string's of pearls OP if you saw my DS's School's Nursery.

They have sledges in the garden for the kids to play on when it snows.

WorraLiberty Thu 22-Nov-12 16:45:06

*go

Dinosaurhunter Thu 22-Nov-12 16:45:50

Yanbu - I see why yih were upset op of course you don't want your child to be ill again but unfortuntly at a nursery it boils down to ratios and I expect there would not be enough staff for a 1-1 ratio inside .
Letting go is hard but as your child is at nursery I'm afraid you have to accept certain elements that are out of your control .

Yabu she is not going to get pneumonia from playing out in the cold

Bert2e Thu 22-Nov-12 16:46:42

I'm afraid you're being totally precious!

thebody Thu 22-Nov-12 16:47:00

Outdoors always great, when I was a cm we went out every single day in all weathers.. Trust me the grown ups arnt having the best time but the children absolutely love it.

Who can beat jumping in puddles?

Op don't make your dd stand out and don't make her precious.

It is hard if she's been I'll but logically it wasn't playing outside that caused this, much more likely picked up a bug at an indoor play centre.

sarahtigh Thu 22-Nov-12 16:48:00

I think YABU it is not that cold in scotland 7C outside which is fine for playing out, I think children should get to play out even if snowy, though obviously in appropriate clothing

children who spend more time out of doors get ill less often, running outside will not make your DD any more likely to get pneumonia etc, in fact it makes it less likely, today was wet in lots of places so waterproofs necessary at DD's nursery that have oilskin type over trousers and jackets so can play in mud etc, she has separate wellies she keeps at nursery, they do not go out if wind above 40mph, hail stones or a blizzard or the sort of heavy rain that stings your face, but snow drizzle breezes is no reason to keep inside

unless children just standing outside they would not need scarves, hat mittens just good padded jacket/coat unless around freezing or close to factoring in wind chill factor

you do need to apologise for shouting not good even if you were being reasonable

Bugs are caused by... bugs not cold. One of the reasons I chose DD's pre-school is because they are very keen on outdoors play and in all weathers. She is an active child and would be hitting other children climbing the walls without regular fresh air and exercise. Talk to your GP about what is going to help her. Hopefully s/he will tell you what we all are.

BeerTricksPott3r Thu 22-Nov-12 16:48:39

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ChippingInLovesAutumn Thu 22-Nov-12 16:49:24

It's HELL windy here, I felt 'blown about' and trust me, I am solid enough not to feel it normally grin The two kids I took to the park this afternoon are 18 months and 4 years. The wind whipped around, the leaves were swirling - we all had a fab time. 3 sets of very rosy cheeks! They had warm coats and hats on - no gloves because I think it's too dangerous at the park (slippery for climbing etc). The eldest has been in hospital 4 times this year with various breathing problems. He is much more likely to get another dose of pheumonia etc from a child in his class than he is being out in the fresh air. The youngest spent half his time there falling over, rolling around in the leaves and generally getting muddy. Nothing a change of clothes when we got back didn't fix.

Make sure she has a toasty warm coat and a hat and she will be just fine!

designergirl Thu 22-Nov-12 16:50:24

I haven't been so precious with her 3 older sisters but I just don't want her to go back to hospital again.

Princessishavingababyboo Thu 22-Nov-12 16:51:26

Yabvu, you have acknowledged that you shouldn't have shouted at the staff, fair enough, but to expect dd so stay in when the others are out, are you going to explain to an upset child she cannot play with her friends, or are you going to pay for the extra staff to supervise your child while the others are outside? And what about free flow time when children actually let to choose what they want to do? Are you going to tell your dd that even just because all the others get to choose to go outside that is not happening for her. She may get poorly again, she may not, but while she is well, let her be like all of her friends, happy and care free!

Wearsuncream Thu 22-Nov-12 16:51:50

I would be irked about this too op.

3b1g Thu 22-Nov-12 16:54:08

If she has asthma that is exacerbated by the cold air, then I think you should have written a letter to school to explain and provide a plan eg inhaler/spacer close at hand when she's out in the cold.
Otherwise, I agree with previous comments that she's better off outdoors than cooped up inside in a centrally heated room sharing everyone's germs.

Sirzy Thu 22-Nov-12 16:55:00

I agree with Beer simply writing "she has been In hopsital etc" doesn't really tell them much.

As I mentioned earlier DS has asthma, he is just turned 3 and has had around 20 hopsital admissions so it is very much an ongoing problem.

The nursery know about his problems, how to treat him and when to encourage him (and a group of his friends normally) to sit down with a story.

They also ensure that he isn't deemed any different from his peers. If they play out he plays out.

Why would a parent want to make their child seem different and miss out when they don't need to?

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