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To think its sad that mental health issues aren't supported more in society

(32 Posts)
Pickles77 Sun 11-Nov-12 08:44:17

Ive had severe depression & PND this year. Im just coming through the end of a tunnel, a dark tunnel. I'm not completly better but I'm a lot better than I was.
I've seen phyciatrists, councillors, doctors & mental health teams. I'm not ashamed to admit this, I'm grateful for the help and support given to them.

So why do two of my friends feel the need to ridicule me behind my back about my mental issues. Saying things such as ' well be careful she might have one of her funny turns' and 'loony bin' comments.

AIBU in thinking society is still scared by the stigma attached to mental illness? Or are there just a few people out there like the fools above who are incredibly immature & niave about depression?

TheDogsRolex Sun 11-Nov-12 16:23:27

There seem to be two camps in my experience, the "pull yourself together" people and the ones who go COMPLETELY over the top. For example, i'm a LP, sometimes my kids really push me and I do eventually snap and actually tell them off (shock, horror), and i've had my mum rushing down here in the past. What exactly does she think i'm going to do to them? (Rolls eyes).

Suffering from depression and anxiety does not a murderer make! Good thing I have one friend who does understand, knows my rants are just letting off steam because life isn't easy and doesn't take me too seriously because she knows i'm an ok person. When i'm quiet she doesn't think i'm planning an axe murder, she knows its because i'm shy or have something on my mind. When i'm louder, she knows i'm a good mood or things are going ok. You know, like NORMAL people. That's the key...she treats me like a normal person, who has bad days, good days and in between days but at the same time understands that sometimes i'm a little more fragile than I appear to be. She just "gets" it.

Where do you differenciate between personality and illness? Everyone has quirks, but when people know you're on meds it's sometimes like your whole personality is scrutinised! You're no longer just you, you're a nutter.

lovebunny Sun 11-Nov-12 16:49:56

people lack intelligence, sensitivity and understanding. and that's the nice ones. your friends aren't nice. sack them and soldier bravely on. you're a survivor and they don't know what you've had to go through. they aren't worth your time.

NymphadoraTonks Mon 12-Nov-12 03:03:52

I personally suffer from Bi-Polar Disorder, it runs in my family and my brother suffers the worst, the family have had to have him sectioned 3 times in the last 3 years.

Luckily everyone in my family circle understand so when I was diagnosed I didn't have to explain anything, they all just understood.
I've not been back into the wider world since my diagnosis and also losing my job. I am worried what the reactions will be especially finding a new job.

My wife also suffers from depression/anxiety and her boss (whilst knowing my wife was taking Anti-D's) said.

"Anti-depressants are just for people who can't face real life"

So yeh, some nice attitudes in the workplace to mental health issues I have to look forward to!

Thankfully Lithium is a wonderful drug and has evened me out to the point where I can function pretty consistantly, even if you do have to put up with some bizzare side effects sometimes (compulsively chewing the sides of your tongue with your molars anyone?)

liveinazoo Mon 12-Nov-12 04:41:15

mental health is something people take for granted.if for what ever reason it wobbles others find it very hard to understand
i have ocd and depression and acute emetaphobia.i "came out" recently<especially as a bug going round at school>
i was a bit quiet and kept away from people for a few days<normally very sociable at gates>after explaining to a mum i thoght understood<and knew she may wells hare what id told her sensitivly as she had done with physical illness>

how wrong can you be!

ive been completely ignored by 2/3 of the women who used to talk to me even going as far as to blank me or pointedly walk away/turn backs on me

there are now just 3 mums who still talk to me,as i wait for my 8yo to go in.a large group with dcs in her year ignore me and the other two dcs friends mums look at me like ive grown another head!

someone<i rarely chatted to> admitted she is suffering with depression and she says people avoid her for fear she will "bring them down".we arent contagious ffs!

FobblyWoof Mon 12-Nov-12 08:33:34

Wow, great friends hmm

Yanbu. At all. Unfortunately it's a society thing. There is definitely a stigma about it.

On the other hand, I do think quite a few people keep it a taboo subject simply because they don't know how to communicate with someone with mental health problems for fear of upsetting them

Mylittlepuds Mon 12-Nov-12 08:59:55

OP I've been through similar. The response from my friends hasn't been negative (a few of them have had their own PND/anxiety issues) but I know there's been comments behind my back about 'not coping' and 'struggling' that I don't feel is fair as if you have mental health problems it's not because you're weak and you can't 'pull yourself together'. For me at least it feels ver out of my control, like any other illness.

I'm glad you're on your way to recovery and you're not alone.

What DogsRollex says is so true. I have asd and depression. The school mums think I'm strange! I can't talk to them because it feels like I don't have common ground to talk to them on, and if I did I would monologue and suddenly spout weird facts about the subject. It comes across as strabge and snobby, but I'm not! Promise! I do try to analyse what is a normal thing to say and what isn't! If you were having a normal conversation about food, and suddenly the other person spouts out "oh did you know the white and brown crusty stuff on the end of your cheese is infact cheese mite poo, and when you eat cheese you're eating thousands of mites".. You would kinda think they were strange! (You would also stop eating cheese for a while grin)
I have come out about asd during a role play excercise, and had a possitive response, but the woman in question has relatives with asd.
Saying that.. You gotta love the school rumour mill. I've heard a rumour that my other half has loads of money! He assured me he hasn't!

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