Mumsnet logoby parents for parents
home search join my Mumsnet recipes reviews local sites blogs member discounts shopping classifieds contact a mumsnetter games
log in

moon
Mumsnet members get a 10% discount from Boden (including free returns and free delivery), The White Company, sweaty Betty, Luxury Family Hotels, JoJo Maman Bebe, Siblu, GLTC, Bump to 3 (the official online shop for Grobags) and more. Click here for more info Join mumsnet here. DiscPart
Mumsnet Discussions: Adoptions : Updated, my cousins have been taken into care. (6 messages)
Add a message Watch this thread Flip this thread Add new thread in this topic
"
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By SimpleAsABC on Mon 01-Sep-08 16:26:02
Hi,

Having spoken to social services it appears that one of my cousins (the older boy, aged 7) is settling well, whilst the toddler (girl 18m) isn't settling at all.

I've spoken to my parents and partner and feel that I @ least need to find out whether or not it could be plausable for me to care for her.

The questions I now have are:

I live at home with my parents. Without assistance I would never be able to afford somewhere to live with the wee one. Would the council / social services be able to help me with this?

I'm currently studying for my degree, before the wee one went into care she had secured a nursery placement two days per week. Do you think such help would still be available if I were to care for her? For example I'd need help on the days I were at uni.

I'm not sure I'd be able to offer the behaviour support which the older child requires. Would SS split the children or do you think that they would see this as detrimental?

Does anyone have any idea what my legal rights are?

I'm sure I have more questions but those are the ones that are jumping out now.

TIA.
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By 3andnomore on Mon 01-Sep-08 19:28:28
Just bumping this up, because I don't really know!
Would think that you would get the same help as any foster parent...but no idea, really, sorry!

Only thing though...don't think it would be a good idea to split the Kids up....
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By mummyBop on Mon 01-Sep-08 21:10:45
As a foster carer you would get considerable support - financial and practical, but the support for "kinship carers" (family) is much more limited and usually at the discretion of SWs. Not sure where you are but I believe the provision in Scotland is slightly better than England (I noticed you used "wee"?).

I would talk to the social workers and see what they say - the nursery place is likely to be fairly straightforward, but the housing more tricky.

It would be better to keep them together, but I understand why you think you would find it hard - and yes it is likely to be tricky to support children with such a traumatic early life.

I think you are doing the right thing in at least looking into this properly. Looking after troubled children is hard work, but also very rewarding and a supportive home environment can be very therapeutic.

A few others things to consider:
- what about the impact on any future birth children?
- what if it didn't work out?
- how would you cope with studying and looking after young children? Could you take some time out? What about working afterwards?
- what support would you have from friends and family?

and finally....Good luck
Bop
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By kat2907 on Wed 03-Sep-08 00:24:16
I live at home with my parents. Without assistance I would never be able to afford somewhere to live with the wee one. Would the council / social services be able to help me with this?

- If you were the legal carer then you could apply for a council flat - SS might write letters of support to help.

I'm currently studying for my degree, before the wee one went into care she had secured a nursery placement two days per week. Do you think such help would still be available if I were to care for her? For example I'd need help on the days I were at uni.

- Shouldn't be a problem.

I'm not sure I'd be able to offer the behaviour support which the older child requires. Would SS split the children or do you think that they would see this as detrimental?

- They would if it was in their interests - ie if the placement works well for one but not the other it's not in the interests of the older one to remove him just to keep them together. Siblings often need more attention that they can get seperately but not together.

Does anyone have any idea what my legal rights are?

- As a cousin? None, but as a carer you could get a residence order or special guardianship which would give you parental responsibility. Unless youfully adopted her the LA would keep parental resp as well (if she's on a care order that is) and that might be better as you would get support ongoing until she is 18 and beyond.

Are they under care orders? If so you could possibly push to be treated as a foster carer with all that entails. If it's just section 20 they may treat you as a kinship carer which attracts less financially and also less support.

Good luck!
Contact the poster Contact mumsnet about this post By SimpleAsABC on Thu 04-Sep-08 01:00:01
thanks kat. unfortunately ive been told there is nothing they can do at the minute but that they will be in touch... it is very very frustrating.
Contact the poster See this person's profile Contact mumsnet about this post By AttillaTheHan on Fri 05-Sep-08 22:22:01
I've posted on this subject on fostering thread, although most of it has been said here already. smile


Add your message here

Message
Emphasis: To bold a word, surround it with asterisks, so *hello* will display hello. For underline use _ , so _hello_ gives hello. For italics use ^, so ^hello^ gives hello. To strike out a word, surround it with two hyphens either side, so --dog-- gives dog

Links and smileys: To insert a smiley face,  , type [smile] or :)
For a big grin,  , type [grin] or :o
For a wink,  , type [wink]
For a shocked face,  , type [shock]
For an angry face,  , type [angry]
For an embarrassed face,  , type [blush]
For a sad face,  , type [sad] or :(
For an envious face,  , type [envy]
For a sceptical face,  , type [hmm]

Links The simplest way to insert a link is to enter the link itself, surrounded by [[ and ]]. So if you type [[www.mumsnet.com]], the link will display as http://www.mumsnet.com. If you want your link to display text other than the web address itself, leave a space after the address then add the text before the ]]. So "Look at [[www.mumsnet.com this page]]", would display "Look at this page".
Nickname:
Password:
To post a message you need a valid mumsnet nickname and password. If you have forgotten your nickname, click here for a reminder. If you are not yet a member of mumsnet, you can join here.