Mumsnet Talk

What were the circs?

I had to get up and leave the dinner table last night and spend an hour reading in my room when my dh and my dmother decided to have a little go at me about how untidy our house is. I am 50 years old ffs and I have ALWAYS been untidy. The house is clean and everyone is well fed and has clean clothes and beds and towels. 95% of that is down to me and the cleaner so dh can go swivel if he thinks I am going to spend my life putting everyone's stuff away for them on top of that! My mum chipped in "I'd hate to be your cleaner".

At that point she had just finished the fourth festive evening meal I had cooked for everyone in a row, having also done ALL of the food shopping as dh worked not only on Christmas Eve but also on the Sunday before. I also did 80% of the present shopping and wrapping, bought all the cards and stamps, got the tree, decorated it and put the decorations up.

I was about to lose it so had to leave the room to cool down.

Anyone else?

Me! Boxing day at my sister and brother in laws. DS was being a little shit a bit of a handful at the dinner table and threatening to chuck food all over their newly decorated dining room. DH was tanking back wine and letting me handle it, despite me being 36 weeks pregnant and finding the constant bending to retrieve thrown cutlery a bit wearing. Final straw was when he said I was causing it/exacerbating it because of my anxiety . I flounced off (or flounced as much as is possible in a small space when you're the size of a house) & locked myself crying in the upstairs loo. My niece and nephew thought I was a total loon .

Oh dear bigboy .

I can see why Christmas is divorce season sometimes, I really can.

Atm I am sitting on the sofa mnetting while dh cooks for everyone. He is trying to make it up to me but I am going to milk it for a few days yet. My mother, thank heavens, has gone home!

Guess it was just you and me then bigboy! Although I haven't been on Mumsnet much for the past week so might have missed all the more dramatic Christmas-family-angst threads

Your DH had a go at you about the house?!
Damn right he should be cooking!
In fairness my DH does too, it's the main cause of arguments here

Haha! I very much doubt that.. Am guessing folk maybe abandoned the Christmas board for Chat once the big day was over?

Or maybe they're all still in the huff

Nope, I managed very well to put on a brave face and only cry in the hotel room when I got out of the company of those people giving me a hard time. For being disabled and not working. And they are my family, so I can't even get away from them. I was complimented by my mother for remaining calm and returning fire with scathing humorous comments, she doesn't now how much I cried when I got back to the room I guess.

Oh, that's horrid Rabbits

Me.

DH never bought me anything for Christmas (he go a kindle fire and a new watch) so I waited until DC were in bed them got huffy like a child. He had asked me for weeks what I wanted, I gave him a few ideas, even took him into shops to show him the items. Week before Christmas he asked me what I wanted yet again so i said not to bother. This is the convo we had in bed Christmas night.

Me: Where is my present?
DH: You said not to get you anything!
Me: When a woman says she dosn't want anything, she doesn't mean it. And I gave you a list of things!
DH: Sorry, do you want me to go et you something tomorrow
Me: No don't bother, I don't ant anything now

Still waiting for a present!

Aw how awful

Oh rabbits, thats awful

A little bit. Grumbling in the kitchen cos my dn didn't call me Aunt X, just X, and my husband just Y rather than Uncle Y (names have been changed to protect the innocent), when dn was talking to his mum.

He doesnt live with his mum he lives with me, I am an aunt, it's a full time position, no holidays, I'm a full time aunt and it means a lot to me to be called Aunt X, and it's like he doesn't want to give me my honorific title in front of his mum in case it puts her out or something?.? It's not like I'm locking in the cupboard for not calling me Mummy. I don't expect Mummy from him, but Aunt seems the least he could do.

grumble, grumble, dh said I should get over it, probably should but I have a long history of people forgetting I exist and calling me my sisters name etc so it matters to me TOO MUCH to get the right name/title..

My family are all Tories I am afraid. I have told them I want to work and I will work, but it would be stupid to do it now while I am ill instead of building a stable life with the correct support, having certain treatments and operations done, and then taking the opportunity to build my skills base. Been toying with the idea of an ironing business though, but if I mentioned that I'd just be criticised for not doing it yet.

Had a huff free Christmas Day. Spent Boxing Day in bed with Norovirus so one long huff with life in general. Been too knackered to huff since so DS did it for me tonight, quite spectacularly, just before we sat down with friends to eat. We let him get on with it since he is always huffy when starving. He eventually unhuffed and joined us.He was made to apologise to all after he had eaten enough food to prevent catastrophic huff to end all huffs.

Feeling a bit deflated this Christmas too - far too much hype and EXPECTATIONS from my lot. Have a look at my blog (please) December 29th - Great Expectations, and you'll see what i mean,
Martha

(Martha Muffett: letters to Nigel Slater...just been made one of mumsnet's featured blogs so you should find it easily, hopefully)