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Talk Roundup
2 March 2007

Am I being unreasonable? asked Mala, To dislike 40 yr old DH calling his mother "mummy". "Always think it sounds horrible, unless the person is under 16." Zippitippitoes explained that it was merely a class difference, "It just means he is uber posh. If this means he is also uber rich I would just smile benignly." But LittleSarah and others agreed, "That is really quite hideous. Every time I hear an adult use the word 'mummy' I cringe." But Xenia was having none of it: "I hate mum. Even the name of this site makes it down market and working class with that dreadful name of "mumsnet" Yuck. Who calls their mother mum? - it's disgusting. Mummy all the way whatever your age. Mummies of the UK unite against dumbing down to mum." Go on Xenia, say what you mean.

Decafskinnylatte noted that many newbies had found it hard to crack the etiquette of Mumsnet (or Mummiesnet) and wondered whether any old-timers would reveal Your worst moment on Mumsnet? To help put the newbies at their ease, the oldies dutifully zimmered forward with confessions of bloody fights, errors of judgement and shameful outings after failed attempts at name-changing to disguise embarrassing personal problems. And then there are the complexities of Mumsnet acronyms... Pity the innocent Margo1974, who confessed, "I thought that LOL meant lots of love for a while [but] you weren't sending me love, you were laughing at me. That was a bad moment for me."

Emkana pondered Things that DH still doesn't get after nearly six years of parenting, after her DH failed to give their children the required Five Minute Warning of the end of bathtime, resulting in such hysteria that he had to run another bath to calm things down. FrayedKnot's DH gives their son "way too much choice for a 2.11 year old ... DH: 'Shall we go swimming today?' DS: 'No!' Well, that's that idea stuffed, then." Twoisplenty was exasperated at her DH's inability to understand that small children are generally not really terribly keen on going to bed, "DH says to DS, 'You need an early night because you stayed up late last night.' Does he expect DS to say, 'Ok Dad, yes an early night sounds just the ticket!'" And BibiThree's DH has still failed to learn that "If you teach her the word boobies/goolies/bumholes, she WILL use it, probably in public."

It might be a bit late for those DHs, but nonetheless we had a Live Event this week - an Online chat with author Cathy O'Neill, the co-author of "Baby-proofing your marriage - How to Laugh More, Argue Less and Communicate Better as Your Family Grows." Cathy made a visit to Mumsnet to answer our relationship queries. These mainly centred around 2 pages from her 260-page tome where a swift blow-job was proposed as a "Five Minute Fix" for stressed parents. Wads warmed to the idea but had some scheduling issues, "When does Ms O'Neill suggest I give the blowjob? After the 1am or 4am breastfeed?" Zephyrcat had similar problems, "How on earth do we make time to get up to anything in the bedroom with all these children? The other morning we hid under the covers and when we stopped, DD was out of the cot and on the bed! [shame]" CathyONeill tried to placate the stressed ladies, "It's not meant to be taken so seriously ... We're having some fun, not trying to turn the clock back." A startled Hunkerdave got the wrong end of the stick, "I read that as 'trying to turn the cock back.'" Definitely something I wouldn't recommend if you are striving for marital harmony.


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