To my trans child who ran away.

Moomoola · 2023-07-18 07:21:25

Hello, I started a thread when our child legged it just before Xmas to live with their partner and their mum. The partner (f to m) has taken puberty blockers and testosterone since 15. (Now both 18). The ironic thing is, they seem very nice and I’m happy for our DD to find someone they love. we just don’t understand why that means moving out in the most abrupt and painful way, and slowly isolating themselves from us. I’m using ‘DD’ and ‘she’ not to be disrespectful, but to keep things simple. I find referring to ‘they’ meaning DD singly, and ‘they’ for DD and her partner together, confusing. I have never had a problem with DD being whatever, but I think a problem has been created - by my naivety, and by social influences, and by the natural schism we all go through in our teens, that seems to be being cracked wide open. Families are being destroyed and, in my humble, bad feeling created where there was none. It just seems so aggressive and painful and unnecessary. Thank you to all who have been so supportive. Like other parents in the same boat - and there are so many of us- we’ve gone through so much confusion and grief and pain while we try and work out what is going on, and how to support our DD - the most hurtful thing being we are not allowed to. By the school, by counselors, by family therapist. By Childline. By woman’s aid. By the G.P. It feels like every door is slammed against us, which is why the last thread was so so appreciated. I hope not to post too much here, I hope it will be resolved. I hope, if you ever read this DD, you will understand that we love you. We aren’t cross, we are longing to sort out such painful and unnecessary misunderstandings, and add all that we’ve been through to the amazingly complicated and rich, evolving soup of life. (Getting a bit poetic there). Big hugs to all . Link next!

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This thread has been withdrawn

The OP's really grateful for all of the advice and support given on this thread - it's helped her immensely. However she's concerned she's posted too many identifying details and so we've agreed to take this down.