Germaine Greer in an Aged Care Home

[TommyNever]

....at age 84. Just seems a bit sad but it's a decision she made herself, presumably because it's unavoidable. Apparently she's not happy there and feels like an "inmate", but I don't have any further information except what's on Wikipedia.
I wonder if there'll be any further Greer books - perhaps one on the shortcomings of care homes!  She's one of the giants of the feminist movement and I feel she still has more to contribute.

[LittleFingerStrength]

I coul barley talk about it, I will try again now.

Advocates are being groomed in Queer ideology so people in care facilities can be targeted.

Lucy was Groomed in Queer ideology and she trained NHS staff to provide Queer - child end of life care, discussing the sexual needs of children etc at one point. I stopped watching what she was doing and took a break as it was breaking me I couldn't stop crying over it. I asked her to stop.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_j_zmZBvsI

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

@DaughterOfPsychiatrist

I am a notable Pollyanna, unfortunately @Theeyeballsinthesky!

That housing project looks great but even thinking of the red tape involved makes my head hurt.

Presumably we’re going to have more and more older people who don’t have any nearby family networks (for loads of reasons, eg contraception making child free a viable life choice, rising house prices causing adult children to move away to cheaper towns and cities, the internet and low cost plane travel making international relationships more commonplace, making it impossible to even be in the same country as both sets of parents)?

I’m at a bit of a life crossroads and thinking about retraining to do something of practical use in the NHS/Care/Social Services field but am a bit stuck due to too much choice/not enough direction. I don’t want to spend a huge amount of time back in highter education so it would need to be a two year conversion degree at most (already have a near-pointless arts MA) Any recommendations for avenues to explore re: eldercare? Seems like it could be a way to do something helpful to others whilst keeping fashionable wokery at a minimum (compared to say, youth services or the NHS).

Art or music therapy?

I used to know a former teacher who worked part-time in a care home as activities co-ordinator. He was constantly striving to give the residents a range of interesting but manageable things to do to pass the time and keep their minds and bodies active. Far more than bingo and TV. No idea how you get into that or how well-paid it is, but a worthwhile job.

[Sausagenbacon]

There was a story a while ago about an older couple who made their home in a Premier Lodge Hotel.

[AussieCallil]

@asundayphilosopher

The whispering gums interview ( see above ) is really interesting. Germaine seems as feisty as ever. She makes lots of salient points about care and women and that because the great majority of very elderly people are female, women should be fighting for improved conditions for carers and for women in care. We should take note.

So true.

[AussieCallil]

@viques

I remember hearing that Marianne Faithful had moved into a care home - I assume because of her many health issues. She has gone into the one that is used by the acting profession/ musicians. I hope it has a more vibrant and lively atmosphere than the majority of care homes do as I can’t imagine her playing bingo and watching afternoon tv.

Denville Hall, I believe.

from their site:
"- socialise with like-minded residents
- watch theatre live-streamed to Denville Hall
- listen to, or play music on one of our pianos
- take part in a poetry group or play games
- be creative in the Art Room
- read in the newly refurbished Sir Terence Rattigan Library
- walk through the Denville gardens
- take day trips out shopping or visit places such as Kew Gardens."

May Marianne soon recover to good enough health that she can enjoy life and partake. She really has been through one hellish time.

(I like to imagine it along the lines of the retired musicians' place in Quartet)
🙂

[Dontknowwhyidothis]

@DaughterOfPsychiatrist

I am a notable Pollyanna, unfortunately @Theeyeballsinthesky!

That housing project looks great but even thinking of the red tape involved makes my head hurt.

Presumably we’re going to have more and more older people who don’t have any nearby family networks (for loads of reasons, eg contraception making child free a viable life choice, rising house prices causing adult children to move away to cheaper towns and cities, the internet and low cost plane travel making international relationships more commonplace, making it impossible to even be in the same country as both sets of parents)?

I’m at a bit of a life crossroads and thinking about retraining to do something of practical use in the NHS/Care/Social Services field but am a bit stuck due to too much choice/not enough direction. I don’t want to spend a huge amount of time back in highter education so it would need to be a two year conversion degree at most (already have a near-pointless arts MA) Any recommendations for avenues to explore re: eldercare? Seems like it could be a way to do something helpful to others whilst keeping fashionable wokery at a minimum (compared to say, youth services or the NHS).

Think about retraining as a social worker with adults. There is a two year MA or a postgraduate work based route through https://thinkahead.org/ which pays you to train. Think ahead specialises in mental health but, once qualified, it s fairly easy to transfer over to older adults, adult learning disability or physical disability services.

[ItsAllGoingToBeFine]

I’m at a bit of a life crossroads and thinking about retraining to do something of practical use in the NHS/Care/Social Services field but am a bit stuck due to too much choice/not enough direction. I don’t want to spend a huge amount of time back in highter education so it would need to be a two year conversion degree at most (already have a near-pointless arts MA) Any recommendations for avenues to explore re: eldercare? Seems like it could be a way to do something helpful to others whilst keeping fashionable wokery at a minimum (compared to say, youth services or the NHS).

Don't need any formal qualifications to become a carer (though, in Scotland at least, will be required to get SVQ Level 2 Social Care within 5 years which your employer will put you through)

[carolecole]

I thought the point about women in their 50s/60s being carers and doing the hardest work and getting unwell themselves was interesting - we know about the "sandwich generation" looking after kids/grandkids as well as elderly parents and the burden this primarily places on women but even in professional care it seems it's often women of this age group who are carrying the burden. Because, of course, it's badly paid. I'm watching MIL in her late 60s starting to slowly be taken over by Alzheimers (and we also know that woman are far more likely to be affected by this disease than men) and it's so sad - we first noticed that something specific was up when we came to visit after a long absence and FIL was pointing out how she was slacking off on the ironing and hoovering 😡She's such an intelligent woman and really the earliest signs (we live in a different country so couldn't visit for a very long time due to covid restrictions) really should have been that she stopped following the news and reading as much... but, no, it was the slacking off on the housework that stood out.

[AskAwayAgain]

@beguilingeyes

When my mum was dying in hospital, it really struck me that almost all of the patients were women, because men die first, right? And almost all of the visitors were women also.. because daughters.

I found this. Mainly daughters visiting. Sons far less frequently or at the last minute.

[AskAwayAgain]

@BinturongsSmellOfPopcorn I agree totally. Care homes that provide loads of activities are really only for those who could just as easily stay at home with paid help. Those who need care homes are generally not capable of taking part in interesting activities because of cognitive decline, or just because they get very easily tired. But you can have a briefish period where you need 24 hour care but still have more energy and your wits about you.

[SnailKite]

I'm the same age as JK Rowling. Joanne, if you're reading, could your next charitable project be a Hogwarts/Denmark Street crossover retirement facility, with a fantastic book club and optional murder mystery evenings, please?

[beguilingeyes]

When my mum was dying in hospital, it really struck me that almost all of the patients were women, because men die first, right? And almost all of the visitors were women also.. because daughters.

[BinturongsSmellOfPopcorn]

I've heard that a lot of older people live on cruise liners as it's cheaper than a care home. 

It's a popular meme that it's cheaper to do this, but the numbers don't really stack up. And the practicalities certainly don't. You can't get any sort of personal care, and medical care is very limited - they'll put you ashore if you have significant medical needs and you could end up stranded anywhere. It might be an alternative to a retirement village, but not to a care home.

Some of the smarter care homes are very like good hotels, and some have entry requirements that mean the residents are reasonably lively and with it. Which is fine while you are too, but again no good for anyone with significant frailties.

My dad always complained that his home was full of 'frail, gaga oldies', but he was older and frailer than a lot of them - and places where he would have been happier with the company were (at least the ones within his budget) set up for more independence and couldn't provide the level of care he needed.

There don't seem to be many good solutions for the later stages of care requirements.

[countrygirl99]

There's care homes and care homes. Currently looking fir mum. We think she would prefer the one where the activities include gin tasting and cheese and wine afternoons.

[Ttwinkletoes]

Is it a Care Home? In Aus they have great accommodation for oldies - tennis, swimming pool, golf etc

[AskAwayAgain]

Cruises give living care like cleaners and cooked food. It is fine when you are struggling a bit. But people do not go into a care home usually at this stage. A cleaner at home and ready made meals or takeaways would serve the same need.
People go into care homes when there personal needs are large. Help going to the toilet, supervision for those with dementia or similar issues.

[lifeissweet]

@beguilingeyes

I've heard that a lot of older people live on cruise liners as it's cheaper than a care home. I don't know if that's true but I want it to be.
Have any of you read the Richard Osman books? I've only read the first one but it's set in a retirement village that would make the Ritz look like a slum.
Total fantasy...unless minted.
Wishing all good things to GG. She's a heroine.

My DF (only 75 and in full mental and physical health) read Richard Osman's
books and it inspired him to sell up and moved into a retirement village just like this. Pool, gym, sauna, bar, restaurant, concierge... very exclusive. Also quite reassuring for me that he's thinking about the next 10/15 years when he will become quite elderly.

I'm living in a 2 bed terrace, will probably retire at around 75 with not a pot to piss in (but good for him!)

[DeoForty]

I feel really emotional when I think of Germaine Greer. I hope she lives to see her inevitable resurgence. I read the Female Eunuch when I was 19. And The Whole Woman shortly after. I couldn't consume enough of what she had to say on feminism. I recall going to watch her on a speaking tour and she suggested everyone meet in the bar to continue the discussion. I scarpered.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

@borntobequiet

I hope it has a more vibrant and lively atmosphere than the majority of care homes do as I can’t imagine her playing bingo and watching afternoon tv.

I imagine bingo and afternoon telly is just what ageing luvvies enjoy.

Not really an FWR anecdote, but I recently saw a post on one of the innumerable 'Have you ever met anybody famous?' threads on MN that made me laugh. It was from a woman who'd agreed to a film crew using her flat for a scene in a feature film. They all arrived during daylight hours but couldn't start filming until nightfall, so they passed the time playing Trivial Pursuit and watching TV with the owner. One of those present was Michael Caine, who kept the assembled company amused with a running commentary on every actor who appeared. I'd have given my eye teeth to be there. I always hope their retirement home is like that.

[AskAwayAgain]

We all get to the stage of needing help, unless we do not live long enough and die suddenly. At least she will have more choices than many of us.

[DaughterOfPsychiatrist]

Re: permanent hotel living - I think it must still be a thing? This Conde Nast article from 2020 is mostly historic accounts but there is one from a 90 year old chap who was living in a hotel at the time the article was published:
https://www.cntraveler.com/story/people-who-live-in-hotels/

He says ‘the bell boys will drive you anywhere, any hour of the day or night’ which tickled me - obvs that’s not a service a care home is going to provide!

Apparently Maggie Thatcher moved into The Ritz aged 87.

https://www.express.co.uk/news/weird/369530/The-hotel-guests-who-never-check-out/

Obvs, the vast majority of us are not going to be in a financial situation that allows us to live our final years in a luxury hotel but it’s an interesting thought experiment, if money is not a consideration what would we truly choose? From what I can see, even (small!) dogs are welcome at the very posh places (and will be walked for you by the hotel staff)

I reckon currently most people would pick ‘stay in my own home with visiting carers’ because that’s the best choice that seems realistic/within reach.

[Theeyeballsinthesky]

Cruise liners, hotels are all fine until you need proper personal care at which point they are not really a viable option

[Theeyeballsinthesky]

id look at the voluntary sector @DaughterOfPsychiatrist 😊 maybe in a policy, research or campaigning role where you’ve got a chance to influence the agenda and practice

yes the demographics have changed massively. Just in terms of older ppl over 65 who have no children at all, it’s already 1.5 million, it’ll be 2 million ppl by end of this decade. There is already a huge care gap and yet the governments policy is clearly to rely on ‘family’ by which generally they mean adult daughters and DIL .

And that’s before you add jn the other factors like distance or estrangement

[beguilingeyes]

I've heard that a lot of older people live on cruise liners as it's cheaper than a care home. I don't know if that's true but I want it to be.
Have any of you read the Richard Osman books? I've only read the first one but it's set in a retirement village that would make the Ritz look like a slum.
Total fantasy...unless minted.
Wishing all good things to GG. She's a heroine.

[AskAwayAgain]

I have never taken hard drugs. I intend to take lots of hard drugs and alcohol in my last years and hopefully die of an overdose.