The Supermarket Sausage Mystery (That My Oxbridge-Bound Kid Solved in Seconds)

[HelloandThankU]

The other day in the supermarket, I spotted something bizarre: a 12-pack and an 8-pack of the exact same sausages, both priced identical. Naturally, you’d grab the 12-pack, right? Everyone else was doing just that. I kept wondering why on earth they’d cost the same, and felt a bit sorry for the 8-packs just sitting there going to waste.

But when I got home and mentioned it, my youngest—who is currently being encouraged to apply for Oxford and Cambridge next year—solved my sausage mystery in a matter of seconds. Am I just being a bit thick?

To defend the OP, buying sausages can be very complicated. 😉

Different fat content, meat content, spices, preservatives, bla, bla - you need an Oxbridge degree to decipher the ingredients list!

You’ve blurred out the per-kilo cost OP. Moronic post.

No you don't. You look at the daily recommended amount on the front of the packet if you're that concerned. It's all very explicit and clear.

Chipolatas are about half the size of a normal sausage. I saw it immediately. My child, who could go to Oxbridge but neither Uni offer the course he wants, would not know that.

I'm waiting for someone to blame schools.
"We never had sausage buying in the curriculum, how are we supposed to know?."

The potential, but not yet, Oxford OR Cambridge applicant must have inherited their alleged intelligence from their other parent.

Chipolatas are small sausages are normal size so not seeing the mystery nor why Oxbridge has anything to do with it

I'm going to start referring to chipolatas as 'far away sausages' now!

The post says that they were told to apply to Oxford and Cambridge. Not “Oxbridge” and not an “or”.

To be fair, I did read that they're planning to change the name of Gonville & Caius to Pork & Leek next year.

Everybody was not grabbing chipolatas ffs

They do the same with lots of products, whereby you simply can't compare like with like. With things like toilet rolls, there's still a big difference in size and thickness/ply of each sheet.

That said, I did have to do a double-take at Tesco once, when I glanced at the shelf price label and saw that the cost was "X pence per 100 shts"

😂😂

True - it was a supermarket; not a nightclub in Kavos.

For a long time, at Asda, they did have weird pricing on Kit Kats, whereby they were exactly the same regular price for a 7-pack as for a 14-pack (both 2-finger, identical weight per bar). I always wondered who on earth was buying the 7-packs - unless it was Sister Assumpta, who knew that she just couldn't trust herself with 14 of them all at once!

But that only covers things like fat, salt, sugar etc. - it won't differentiate between the premium ones with far more premium meat and the bargain ones made mainly of trotters and sawdust.

I do hope this gets to forty pages.

I generally buy whatever’s on offer in the sausage section.

I solved that in seconds and I only went to Uni of Greenwich

If you read the full OP (not just the title), the school is encouraging the child to apply to both Oxford and Cambridge. Hence the multiple replies explaining why that’s bullshit.

Everyone is familiar with the portmanteau and how it’s used. OP slipped up in the body of the message.

There’s also the slight matter of the difference between being encouraged to apply somewhere, and taking up a place there. There are many hurdles to clear. So you can’t really say your DC is Oxbridge-bound (which means headed there) until they actually have an offer, have achieved the conditions and are basically packing their bags.

Oh my god! It's a minefield!
We need someone who works for NASA to help us out! 😨

I solved it in a millisecond and I've only ever been shopping in Oxford and Cambridge. 😂

I went to a polytechnic and I worked it out before I’d got to the bottom of the post. I’m also the mum of a Y12 A level student, so I know you can not apply to O and C. Must try harder.

edited for typos

I went to university in Cumberland. The pathway to the main entrance was really twisty-turny and felt like it went on forever.

It was a test.
You didn't give up.

I see what you did there 🤣🤣🤣👏👏👏