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KarmaNoMore · 15/10/2016 08:00

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AliceThrewTheFookingGlass · 15/10/2016 08:24

Sorry I have no real advice for you but didn't want to leave your post unanswered.

Has your DS considered becoming an adult instructor for cadets when he's old enough? I was a member of the ACF for many years and a lot of our adult instructors were people who wanted to join the army but couldn't for one reason or another.

I know you didn't ask about this but is your son able to use a laptop at school to do his work on? We had a girl at secondary school who was unable to write properly so she was allowed to type everything on a laptop instead. This meant she could still do her work and show her knowledge as best as she could.

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Peebles1 · 15/10/2016 09:09

Do commercial airlines have the same rules? No idea, just a thought. As a parent I suppose we do have a tendency to try and 'fix' things, but maybe he just needs you to sympathise and be there while he's going through this upset.

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Sugarpiehoneyeye · 15/10/2016 09:21

Gently pushing aside his early life, and speaking about the here and now.
Unfortunately, life is full of knock backs and disappointments, try not to make it a big issue.I know it's upsetting, we all want our children to follow their dreams and succeed. How about being really positive, could he , not sure of his age, earn some money somehow, or collect Birthday and Christmas money, and save up for his own small plane, flying lessons, yes he could, yay ! ๐Ÿ˜„
Maybe, he could become interested in airport control.
Do you live anywhere near a small airfield, pop along with him, explain his interest. Lying in bed will get him nowhere, tell him.

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iPost · 15/10/2016 09:41

My father, in the latter part of his career as a fighter pilot, worked with the applicants that made it... and then turned out to get airsick in a non-commercial plane. Not everybody who went through special "anti puking" training got over it. Broken dreams, even at the later stages of jumping through hoops, are not unheard of.

So I'd try here this forum Plenty of serving and ex military pilots here. As well as people who always wanted to be a pilot, but didn't make it. And they can be quite approachable. Between them they should be able to point you/him in alternative directions as well as offer tips for how others have moved past their searing disappointment.

I have a video the RAE medics made of my father, about how to stay conscious under high G-force. Watching him, I can see why asthmatics would be at a potentially deadly disadvantage.

I have it tucked away in a private folder, but if you son would like to see it, to understand better why nobody would risk his life, and the lives of those pootling around on the ground as planes fly overhead, I can send you a link. PM me if it you think it would help. Sometimes it helps to have concrete evidence that a line in the sand isn't there for very good reason, rather than being a random, meaningless barrier, erected for archaic reasons.

About the writing, would the school be open to him using an app like Dragon Dictation ?

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iPost · 15/10/2016 09:49

edit

Sometimes it helps to have concrete evidence that a line in the sand is there for very good reason, rather than being a random, meaningless barrier, erected for archaic reasons.

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grassroots · 15/10/2016 09:56

Here is the guidance from the CAA on asthma and related conditions.

www.caa.co.uk/Aeromedical-Examiners/Medical-standards/Pilots-(EASA)/Conditions/Respiratory/Respiratory-guidance-material-GM/

Maybe, when he is feeling better, he can work out some other options ? Hopefully it won't rule out a career in aviation altogether. Best wishes.

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grassroots · 15/10/2016 10:04

Also, the Royal Navy have different medical criteria for their pilots.

c69011.r11.cf3.rackcdn.com/eccb6c2c44bb44a98f055592c56f7e08-0x0.pdf

Worth having a look at least.

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Sugarpiehoneyeye · 15/10/2016 10:13

Hi Karma, lots of great help and advice here, hope it makes you feel better.
I'm sure your Son will buck up a bit now, there is plenty for him to go on, here. ๐Ÿ’

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iPost · 15/10/2016 10:48

The way you talk about how switched on and focused your son is reminds me of my own teenager. And I did really really worry about his capacity for dealing with broken dreams, cos his long term career plan is one hell of a long shot and he didn't seem able to accept that it is a long shot.

He is basketball obsessed, so I bought him basketball related titles by an specific author. Came across another of his books which is not basketball specific and DS rates it as the best thing he has ever read 30 million times

It seems to have created a distinct attitude swing and opened him up mentally to a future outside the tight confines of his current dream job. It wasn't an overnight change, it was more subtle. But in the space of a few months he has widened his range of interests, looked at various routes within the same field, started talking about other fields that might be interesting to work in, and is applying the same sort of focus in other arenas that previously was directed exclusively at basketball.

He hasn't given up on his dream at all. But he appears to be more open and ready to take on Plan Bs.

I think perhaps the biggest impact has been I feel I can afford to worry a little less about his resilience in the face of intense disappointment. Because he is talking about how he has the ability to influence how many future possibilities will be open to him, rather than just being overly invested in the one he wants more than anything else in the world.

Might be worth having a look at the blurb and the reviews to see if its content might appeal to your lad. As a post disappointment tool it could be quite useful to help him regroup his energies and point them outwards in a positive way.

Just be prepared for lengthy "Dick says..." monologues. Very lengthy. And potentially quite repetitive to boot. Grin

love. It hurts when they hurt.

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P1nkP0ppy · 15/10/2016 10:57

Friend's son was too tall to get in the RAF as a pilot (he passed two interviews before they bothered to tell him ๐Ÿ˜Ÿ) so he did aeronautical engineering instead. He too was very disappointed but has done very well since and now works in the Middle East.

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ViveLesVacances · 15/10/2016 11:49

Karma - I had asthma as a child, but it vanished after the age of about 12. When I did my scuba diving license I had to get a GP medical (standard practice) and they said as I hadn't had asthma in years, it was now considered that I didn't have it at all.

I was 21 when I did the license and probably 11 at the time of my last asthma episode. Worth checking in with the GP?

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KarmaNoMore · 15/10/2016 14:30

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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KarmaNoMore · 15/10/2016 14:52

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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iPost · 15/10/2016 15:21

Karma

I've sent a link to vid by PM

If it doesn't work let me know and I'll upload it to another platform.

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