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Elloello · 11/06/2020 13:44

OP's posts:
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PerditaProvokesEnmity · 11/06/2020 15:31

When I was about 14 or 15 I took my pocket money to the Co-op in town and bought the Genesis album Trick of the Tail. Carried it home and played it endlessly.

I cannot stand the album. I didn't like it then, I never grew to like it. Why did I buy it? Because the sixth form girls at my boarding school played it in their common room.

Not a single one of them would have given a damn about my sudden conversion. They barely spoke to me.

I'm still Confused about my behaviour. But these days I choose music I like.

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Terralee · 11/06/2020 15:37

I generally only buy things I think look nice.

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Elloello · 11/06/2020 15:57

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PerditaProvokesEnmity · 11/06/2020 15:59

To answer your question less obliquely - I like frayed tweed and wellington boots, difficult, expensive perfume, emeralds. I don't give a fig for threaded eyebrows or gel nails so I don't have to think about them. I tend to shop only for the most enjoyable ten percent of my life at any given point - so spend most of my life (particularly in lockdown) dresses in inappropriately extravagant rags.

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PerditaProvokesEnmity · 11/06/2020 16:05

Sorry, crossed you, OP!

Right - pretend I'm giving you £300 for some footwear (since that seems to be what's troubling you). None of your colleagues will ever see your purchase. What do you really, really want to buy?

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Elloello · 11/06/2020 16:19

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Elloello · 11/06/2020 16:22

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PerditaProvokesEnmity · 11/06/2020 17:13

Crockett and Jones

or

Grenson

for the brown boots? (I have no opinion on Doc Martens.)

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Elloello · 11/06/2020 18:56

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fizzpopbang123 · 12/06/2020 08:56

I am terrible for being influenced and buying into a lifestyle I don't have. I often wonder if I didn't do enough make believe dress up play as a child! I buy something and waft around in front of the mirror imagining the scenarios I would wear it. Not so much MN but I'm terribly influenced by Instagram even though I am critical and very aware of all the gifting and covert advertising.

I have to be very careful to keep in mind the lifestyle I have. I WFH, walk dogs, do a lot of outdoor sports. Have a very casual social life and live in a city which is also laid back and creative, so any dress style goes day or night.

I do not go to dinner parties where women where pretty dresses and sparkly shoes, or smart restaurants or wine bars. I walk around 10km a day so pretty, sparkly ballet pumps and strappy sandals will not work.

Shallow, but I also try and imaging how I'd feel if I bumped into someone I admired, or fancied, while out. Would I feel an idiot in my outfit, or super confident and happy with my projected image?

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fizzpopbang123 · 12/06/2020 09:01

Anything I don't rip the tags off and wear almost immediately I try and return, and take it as a sign it's not right. If I unbox and toss in a corner with the tags on to review later, it's is almost always a sign I won't wear it.
However the long returns periods at the moment are giving me more pause to procrastinate. I have a pile of stuff and packaging I really should make a decision on!

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Duchessofealing · 12/06/2020 09:02

I think it’s fine to have something that isn’t what you would normally wear as long as it makes you smile. It’s also fine for your style to shift a bit. If something makes you smile on the inside when you look at it, if you can afford it, you should buy it. It will make you happy every time you wear it (or them in this case) and everyone looks great when they are happy.

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Tableclothing · 12/06/2020 09:16

How will I ever reduce whats in my wardrobe confused

Just... stop buying stuff. Don't buy any of the shoes you're looking at now. Going by this comment, you really don't need them.

So often clothes shopping is aspirational - if I buy those leggings I'll be fitter, if I get that handbag I'll be more successful, those trainers will make me cooler, that dress will make me younger, that new top will mark a watershed in my life and when I get it I'll go to a lot more parties... It's complete superstition. The most ironic is "I'll have a much smaller, sleek, easier, modern coordinating capsule wardrobe where everything goes with everything else... if I just buy these 10 new pieces of clothing". Then there's the moral conundrum of the organic/low water usage/fair trade etc etc garments. Yep, less harmful than fast fashion, but it'll be even better for the environment if people stop buying stuff they don't actually need.

To reduce what's in your wardrobe - wear what you have until it falls apart. If you then find that you can't manage without, buy a replacement. It's easier if you unsubscribe from all shop emails and stop reading fashion articles.

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Sooverthemill · 12/06/2020 09:17

Of course you are influenced by others unless you live in a cardboard box but unless you end up buying stuff you do not wear and you can afford the purchase does it matter? I am not influenced for example by the Lucy and Yak dungarees lovers on here but I am by those who show me links to brands like Grenson that I'd not heard of but really like the look of ( can't afford mind you). How do you decide what washing machine to buy? What car? ( for me it's colour, always). I don't see it as a problem if you can afford and you use what you buy

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JMAngel1 · 12/06/2020 09:51

I see style as continually evolving - if I wore the same style year after year, decade after decade, how would I differentiate between the different stages in my life and trigger memories. Sometimes just a few tweaks can freshen me up and invigorate me with new enthusiasm for my day to day life. I think in order to not be swayed mindlessly by every new trend, I have a strong opinion of what I fundamentally like. So for me for footwear, I love a distressed chunky boot for day, kind of italian style, or a v front shoe boot for night. My head is never going to be turned by a doc martin trend or brogues for example. But I will switch up the color/style of my boots. And so on for the rest of my wardrobe. The problem is when what I love becomes a trend again and it's hard to resist buying lots as there's a panic feeling that this won't be around for much longer. I'm struggling not to buy ALL the satin cowl neck camisoles at the moment as they are my go to summer top and have been for years and I'm loving that it's a trend again so I can have all the colours I've ever dreamed of.

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JMAngel1 · 12/06/2020 10:01

@PerditaProvokesEnmity
Your style sounds fab - I'm picturing you as an I Capture The Castle character. Tell us more about the expensive difficult perfume.

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Lampan · 12/06/2020 10:07

Surely being influenced to consider different things is ‘fashion’ though? Fashions change and part of the fun is trying out different things, sometimes things that you wouldn’t have considered or didn’t even like before.
Reading a board like this means you must be open to some level of influence and there’s nothing wrong with that. Just make sure that if you do buy something it is because you like it and have use for it, rather than that you think you should have it.

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Floisme · 12/06/2020 11:24

Speaking strictly for me, life changes, my body changes and I get bored wearing the same style. Yes I'm influenced by other posters, as I am by people all around me - sometimes it's to try an unfamiliar writer or film and sometimes it's to wear something different. If it's not really for me, I soon realise but I'd rather make some mistakes than stay in the same lane all my life.

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PerditaProvokesEnmity · 12/06/2020 11:42

I'd rather make some mistakes than stay in the same lane all my life.

Absolutely! What I described is what I like now, rather than in the past or perhaps the future.

JMAngel1 Much of the difficulty I mentioned is in actually sourcing the stuff. My DM and I seem to share a knack of killing off perfumers. (Pre-COVID, lighthearted ...) The minute either of us falls in love with a perfume they either cease production or the maker dies and there is no more.

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Elloello · 12/06/2020 11:44

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Elloello · 12/06/2020 11:46

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Floisme · 12/06/2020 11:59

I think it may depend on whether you regard clothes as purely functional or as a way of expressing yourself. If you're in the first camp then I can see how you might believe there's something inherently wrong in having more than you physically need.

Me, I'm very much in the second camp. I have little creative talent so for me, clothes are an outlet. I take on board ethical considerations about how and where clothes are made and I try and be careful where I shop. But I feel no more guilt about owning a lot of them than I do about having loads of books.

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GinasWig · 12/06/2020 12:07

I find when im going through a thing i make unusual clothes choices. Wanting to be someone else or reinventing myself sort of thing. Sad but true.

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Elloello · 12/06/2020 12:37

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Standrewsschool · 12/06/2020 12:41

I got a style and colour analysis done before Christmas. It’s helped me a lot.

I may see someone wearing something gorgeous on tv, but if it’s the wrong shape and/or colour for me, I know it will end up looking frumpy.

I don’t get everything right, but there’s more hits then misses now.

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