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Teething molars - tell me I will sleep again (and that I'm not the world's worst mummy)

26 replies

Penguin13 · 10/05/2016 06:07

DD nearly 17mo has never been the best sleeper but working with a gentle sleep consultant we had finally got to a good place by her 1st birthday. Her turning one was marked by the much more momentous occasion of sleeping through for the third night consecutively for the first time ever. And then.....teething hit, and illness, then teething and illness. Before we knew it we were back to one to two wakes a night and often feeding her for comfort with a bottle as not doing so would result in an hour or more of inconsolable screaming. And now the second molars are coming, she has had a horrible cold at the same time and sleep has totally turned to shit. I am so frustrated after all our work we are back here. I can see her trying to get back to sleep without our help, she can settle herself when not ill or teething but right now she can't. I am scared that all these bad habits are here to stay and we are back to square one or worse Sad Guess I'm just looking for a hand hold really. In RL am surrounded by people with great sleepers who don't get it including one particularly smug bastard who if their second baby currently on the way isn't a shit sleeper there is NO justice

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ISaySteadyOn · 10/05/2016 06:29

This too shall pass. Teething is often accompanied by what DH and I call the teething snuffle. The molars are the worst.

Also, I have 3 DC and I have found that sleep doesn't really sort itself out until all teeth are in. So don't worry too much.

SpaghettiMeatballs · 10/05/2016 06:36

I'd just do whatever you need to do to get through it and if that includes milk in the night then so be it.

Both of mine had milk in the night when they were teething molars. I used to put calpol in the bottle.

Her teeth will come through and she will grow out of this. I know that doesn't help at all while you are going through this.

By the time my second was going through it I'd learnt that it was best not to talk about it unless you knew the listener was sympathetic. It made it worse with my first to hear advice such as 'leave her to scream' or 'mine never did that' or 'teething really isn't that bad' blah blah blah.

Penguin13 · 10/05/2016 07:18

Thanks Isn't and Spaghetti. Just been a tough 17 months few days Smile Think these are definitely the worst ones so far though canines weren't exactly a picnic.DD has started grinding her teeth this time which she hasn't done before and I can feel her grinding her teeth when I cuddle her against my chest. She's been off her food too which is very rare.

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Penguin13 · 10/05/2016 07:20

I mean isay sorry. Auto-correct!

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ISaySteadyOn · 10/05/2016 11:28

The molars are the worst as they grind up through the gums so they take longer. I'm not surprised she's off her food, it might hurt to eat.

Cucumber sticks sometimes help as they are cool and hard. Also, bickypegs worked for ours.

Penguin13 · 11/05/2016 04:49

Thanks isay will have a look at bickypegs. The cold is getting better and thought we were turning a corner with sleep as she managed 7 hours straight tonight but she's been up for the last 1.5 hours and counting Confused -DH's turn in with her at the mo. We're a very sleepy tag team!

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SpaghettiMeatballs · 11/05/2016 06:38

It is very hard on you both. If it helps at all it didn't seem habit forming for mine. They went back to sleeping in longer stretches once the teeth were through.

Are you giving her calpol or ibuprofen. Painkillers were the only things that really helped mine. DS would only chew his finger and the nail came off. Awful.

MamaMittens · 11/05/2016 06:49

I feel your pain, my second is just sleeping 5 hours at a stretch at 23 months. This is the longest she's ever slept. I'm dreading the molars coming, every time she has a cold it all goes to pot. Hang in there, it can't last for ever. Be grateful your DC will let you tag team - mine screams until she is sick if anyone other than me goes to her at night! Flowers

Penguin13 · 11/05/2016 07:01

Oh Mama that sounds so tough not being able to tag out when you could cheerfully throw them out of the window it all gets too much- it shows what frame of mind I am in/how sleep-deprived I am that I initially read your post as 'it CAN last forever' Grin

Thanks Spaghetti good to know. Yep medicating here - on the worst nights alternating calpol and ibuprofen. Hate relying on meds but sometimes they really need it.

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ISaySteadyOn · 11/05/2016 08:02

I too use meds sparingly but teething is something else.
Oh, there's another thing we noticed in ours if it helps. Sometimes if the pain is really bad, they get really active as in bouncing off the walls even if it is clear they are exhausted. We think they are trying to move away from the pain.

tinymeteor · 11/05/2016 09:00

Flowers

Molars are grim! Lots of sympathy here. I've been there on the sleep deprivation too, people whose kids just slept through will never know...

For colds, we've found a humidifier really useful, it helps with breathing and creates some background noise which is soothing too.

Penguin13 · 11/05/2016 13:42

Thanks for the sympathy Tiny. The worst thing for me is the ones who imply that it was somehow something they did and by extension something we didn't do that means they have a good sleeper rather than sheer luck. They love to offer their unsolicited pearls of wisdom when what I really need is a massive coffee and a hug!

Yes we have a warm air humidifier and it does help. She has been coughing despite it though Sad Fingers crossed we are through the worst of the cold now though struggling to monitor the progress of the teeth without losing a finger in the process!

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tinymeteor · 11/05/2016 15:15

Top tip: when she's over her cold and in a good mood, get dad or someone else to play a game that involves dangling her upside down to make her laugh. You can get a really good look at her teeth and no finger biting involved!

Penguin13 · 11/05/2016 16:18

Ooh will have to try that Tiny. She loves being thrown around so could be a good tactic Smile

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Penguin13 · 12/05/2016 06:15

Woohoo! Looks like we are hopefully through the worst as she slept without waking for 9 blissful hours last night. She then woke at 5.30 and couldn't get her back to sleep but a huuuuuuge improvement!! Not going to get too comfy as the usual pattern is to have a couple of good days then for teething to rear it's ugly head again but will enjoy the respite whilst it lasts. Thank God we are on the last 4 teeth blithely ignores all the other factors like illness that can disrupt sleep

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EsmesBees · 12/05/2016 06:25

Yay! Sounds like she's turned the corner.

Penguin13 · 12/05/2016 08:00

Thanks Esmes. Realised that of course I have broken the cardinal rule and spoken of the positive sleep development so am sure the sleep gods will see fit to send an appropriate smackdown to correct me Grin

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minipie · 12/05/2016 22:23

Yes do whatever you have to do during teething (especially molars), once it stops she will go back to better sleep. You might have to be a bit tough for a day or two to remind her she can go back to sleep by herself but you might not.

I know one of those smug people too. Convinced it's because of what she did that her kids sleep well. Must admit I am slightly pleased that her second currently is up more than mine...

Penguin13 · 12/05/2016 22:50

Thanks mini. Just getting back from my weekly evening out which was kept me sane(ish) through some of the trickier patches so will see whether last night was a fluke!

Heehee sweet revenge with DC2 hey? I hope that when enquiring after them you ensure you do the concerned head-tilt and preface ridiculous or at the very least basic suggestions with the words 'have you tried...x?' Not that I am harbouring an unhealthy deep well of resentment or anything

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Penguin13 · 13/05/2016 00:47

Yup. Knew it was too good to be true Sad

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ISaySteadyOn · 14/05/2016 18:48

Poor Penguin. I empathise today. DS is teething right now and DD2 is growth spurting so I spend my nights bedhopping. It's not so much sleep deprivation as broken sleep cycles isn't it?

InsaneDame · 14/05/2016 18:52

That's what did me in ISay, it was the dropping off to sleep only to be woken 15 minutes into a sleep cycle that did me in. I could cope if it was just less sleep but taken in one block, months worth of nothing but broken sleep cycles can lead to insanity!

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Penguin13 · 15/05/2016 20:00

Thanks for the sympathy. Actually the night I posted wasn't so bad in the end with just one wake and the next night we had 7.30 till 6.30 with just one 10min wake at 9 when the elephants next door were thundering around..........

......however. 3 good nights were apparently our alloted tone for a reprieve as teething recommenced in earnest yesterday and tonight has resulted in a screaming meltdown at bedtime. So that was nice. Having checked her mouth as best as I was able it appears that none of the 4 have broken the surface yet so we could be in for a while more of this . Fml! Grin Feeling surprisingly chipper weirdly. Maybe because she did actually sleep well in between bouts of teething. May as well have all the bastards out asap!

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Penguin13 · 15/05/2016 20:05

Oh and Isay I can only imagine how hard it must be with 2 when they are both not sleeping. Hope the teeth/growth spurt feeding frenzy calm down soon and sleep harmony is quickly restored.

I think the hardest thing for me has been the mental side of it. Not knowing when things would improve and feeling that I was a huge failure and must be doing loads of things wrong when everyone else's babies seemed to be sleeping so much better than mine.

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ISaySteadyOn · 15/05/2016 22:14

You are doing nothing wrong. It is luck of the draw and teething is the worst. It will end eventually.

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