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Pregnancy

Worst comment you've ever received

89 replies

Hazandduck · 15/08/2017 14:45

OK, so I have always been pretty sensitive about my weight. I just hate people commenting on it, because it really is none of their business, and I will torture myself for absolutely ages afterwards and feel hideous and self-conscious if someone says something negative about my size (even in jest.) So now I am pregnant, and so unbelievably happy to be so, and feel all glowy and loving the bump, but some people are just making horrible comments!

There is one woman in particular at work; I was sat at my desk this morning, and for the second time she loudly shouted "Oh wow, hi Fatty!" so all the office heard and I just went bright red and stupidly wanted to cry! I'm not fat, I'm bloody 27 weeks pregnant, and even if I was fat, why is it ok to declare it to all my colleagues? I just don't get why she keeps saying stuff. Of course I've gained weight, but why do people have to point it out.

She actually said to me the other day "Every time I see you you're bigger!" Duh. That's how pregnancy tends to work! And then she kept staring at my face with her eyes narrowed and said "I don't know what it is...your face has changed..." I tried to be blasé and said "Oh yes people have said I'm glowing," to which she shook her said and said "No it's definitely not that, your face has changed shape." It feels like she is deliberately trying to get some sort of negative reaction the way she keeps going on.

So what's your worst comment? And how did you handle it? I really can't see how I'll keep my cool for another 12 and a half weeks with comments like this...

OP posts:
TippetyTapWriter · 15/08/2017 14:54

She sounds absolutely horrendous. And like she has issues she's unfortunately taking out on you. I'd like to advise you to tell her to fuck off but I know I'd never do it myself in real life. I actually hadn't had any bad comments until today when a chavvy bloke in the park shouted I had a big fat belly and implied crudely that I'd had sex more than once (was out with ds, so duh!). I'm a size 12 and 31 weeks pregnant so not 'fat'. People are just awful sometimes. I'm just glad I'm not them.

Notreallyarsed · 15/08/2017 14:59

My friend's flatmate who thought he was the best thing ever said to me "are you pregnant or fat?" To which I responded "both, ya cheeky bastard."

Hazandduck · 15/08/2017 15:05

Wow that is so rude @tippetytapwriter! It actually amazes me how rude some people can be, and that coming from a total stranger when you were with your child! You would think people would be more sensitive when they are talking to a pregnant woman, but it seems it is a licence to be horrible and let rip!

Congratulations though, both have autumn babies on the way :)

OP posts:
Hazandduck · 15/08/2017 15:07

That's a good comeback @notreallyarsed. I tend to just be focused on hiding my blushing cheeks when people say that sort of crap to me lol, rubbish at the quick quips!

OP posts:
Mymouthgetsmeintrouble · 15/08/2017 15:08

Just remember when people say crap like this its a reflection on them not you and by picking on you infront of your colleagues will only make them look bad , my mil is forever saying spiteful things about my looks but i just ignore it and think to myself she cant like herself very much if the only way she can make herself feel better is by hurting others

CaptWentworth · 15/08/2017 15:09

"Oh wow, that's going to sting a bit..." While prodding my enormous belly.

Lemondrop99 · 15/08/2017 15:10

Was walking down the road a few days ago with some NCT friends (so 4 pregnant ladies) and someone walked past and said "watch out, here come the teletubbies". I'm sure they thought they were funny but I found it bloody cheeky!

Bluntness100 · 15/08/2017 15:11

My doctor. I fell pregnant at a size ten. I'm tall and he used to make stupid comments like " are you vegetarian is that why you're so thin" Confused I did put on about four stone. And then he said " you're just so big". We weren't even discussing my weight. In either instance.

Fucker.

Stedalu · 15/08/2017 15:25

My advice would be to calmly approach her and tell her that her comments are upsetting you and that you'd appreciate her not embarrassing you in front of the whole office again, she'll probably say that she didn't mean to embarrass you but tell her again that it did and remind her that pregnancy causes your body to change.

And remember that in 12 weeks time you won't have to see her for a year.

Bisquick · 15/08/2017 15:48

One of these days I'm going to work up the courage to use the MN classic of "Did you mean to be so rude" IRL. I know how you feel OP! I'm 21 weeks and humongous at the moment, and have been upset over much more innocuous comments. You colleague sounds like a nightmare. Sure she may have issues of her own but v unnecessary to project them onto you!

Good luck with your pregnancy and try to ignore the idiots! Flowers

MerlinsLeftButtock · 15/08/2017 15:59

Oh, haz, that is so unkind. I had loads in my first pregnancy. I did put on a lot of weight, and it was probably quite the shock as I was pretty slim before had. But I had one lad say 'your arse has gotten massive!'
And his brother said 'you look like a human version of my car' (he had a Renault megan') it was so rude. And did quite upset me because if I was 'just fat' no one would have said anything would they? But as I was pregnant it was apparently acceptable.

Try not to let it bother you. She is just being a cow. I'm currently pregnant too, and my face has definitely changed. It's quite round and I hate it, so I'd be mortified if someone pointed it out. Ugh. People can be so cruel. I'm sure you look beautiful and glowing.

LavenderLemons · 15/08/2017 16:05

I was pregnant and pushing my three year old in her pushchair with assorted bags of shopping up the hill to my house one very hot July day when (nosy) neighbour popped up in her garden and said sarcastically "oh well, never mind, you haven't got long to wait now."

She was shocked when I replied I wasn't due til the end of October. I was huge though, to be fair. (Ovbiously didn't occur to her to offer to give me a hand with the bags or buggy!)

crazymissdaisy · 15/08/2017 16:08

" are you sure it's not twins?"

FaithAgain · 15/08/2017 16:12

Well it's not going to be a small baby is it?! pointing at my stomach. She was 5lb 4oz Hmm

I would say to her I know you probably think it's funny but you're actually really upsetting me. Please stop

MotherOfTheBears · 15/08/2017 16:38

Well, your colleague sounds like a first class arse.

With my first pregnancy, my Mother, Father and one of my friends told me they didn't think I would be able to cope with being a parent and that I will be terrible at it. Here I am with an amazing, kind and funny 6 year old daughter... that showed them.

I am currently two weeks away from my due date and I was already a size 18 prior to pregnancy so you can imagine how fucking huge I am. I went to my local Tesco to the chemist to get some pain relief for my partners toothache. The chemist did not ask if the tablets were for me but just said 'Are you pregnant?'.
What I wanted to do was say 'Are you fucking kidding me??' but what I actually did was stood there, slightly teary and very offended.

Somehow people think its okay to be absolute knobbers to pregnant women... don't you just love peopling?

Maybe next time you make the office a brew, gob in hers.

Bravas · 15/08/2017 16:44

Don't engage with her she sounds like a prize bitch.

I was very small, lots of concern over babies health, extra scans etc. So already very worried, my colleague liked to examine my non bump daily and exclaim how there couldn't possibly be a baby in there. He arrived safely and sturdy at 7lb 12oz much to everyone's amazement. At the time it was very hurtful and made an already stressful time much worse.

VulvalHeadMistress · 15/08/2017 16:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hazandduck · 15/08/2017 20:00

Ah thank you everyone for your replies, they have made me feel comforted and have a much needed laugh too at the comebacks, I am sorry you have all been victim to the shitty comments as well though! I am tempted by the gob in tea suggestion haha.

We are bloody beautiful women growing little miracles! I will repeat that like a mantra to myself :) x

OP posts:
emmaluggs · 15/08/2017 20:05

Not related to my weight, but keep getting told I'm going to have a massive baby and they'll have to break my legs to get it out by a colleague. She said it today to which I just looked at her, and she said I am joking you know. I responded by saying well yes as it is pretty ridiculous conclusion, I'm hoping that'll be the last time she says it.

I don't know what it is about pregnancy that makes people suddenly believe they can say what the hell they like!

Hannah91x · 15/08/2017 20:12

Agree that she must have some of her own issues to be saying things like that! She sounds awful to work with Angry I'm only 20 weeks and a colleague said 'omg you've gone massive!' today and just stared at me in disbelief. Don't see why it's acceptable to say stuff like that pregnant or not, but ah well!

Good luck with everything and congrats!!xx

Mermaid36 · 15/08/2017 20:15

When I was pregnant with my twins, people kept saying "oh, you're huge"....
Well, obviously! I have 2 bloody babies in there!!!

Fintress · 15/08/2017 20:17

I'm quite petite and had a huge bump when pregnant. A male work colleague said to me 'your body will be like a roadmap by the time that baby arrives'. I just retorted 'at least I have nice teeth to fall back on'. His teeth were like a row of condemned houses.

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Hannah91x · 15/08/2017 20:21

@Fintress Hahaha I absolutely love that come back GrinGrin what an absolute tosser though saying that to a pregnant woman! AngryAngry x

Aozora13 · 15/08/2017 20:28

My (senior) colleague had the audacity to tell me to lay off the biscuits or I'd get too fat. Didn't cry or punch him though as I am Very Professional

TBH tho the worst was when people kept telling me how small or neat my bump was when unbeknownst to them I was waiting for a growth scan as I was measuring small and panicking there was a problem.

Wish people would just keep their opinions to themselves (and give me a biscuit)

Sophieelmer · 15/08/2017 20:30

I've never been bigger than a size 8 and only gained a bump no other weight when pregnant and still had a colleague refer to me as fatty everytime they saw me. She probably doesn't even think about the offence she could be causing just has absolutely no imagination and it's trying to make small talk, really you should pity her.

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