Full of regret at having kids

fullofregretnow · 2023-01-31 04:17:48

I've got 2 children who I love and they are sweet children who will (hopefully) grow into lovely people one day, and I adore them 80% of the time when there's no tantrums etc. But despite loving them, I feel deeply full of regret at ever having children. I miss my "old life" so so so much, I miss the freedom of just every single thing that comes without having children. I miss my DH and how we used to be / how our relationship was then. I miss lazy weekends, not having to get up. And the travel I used to do... this is probably the biggest thing. Yes I know I can still do things, and we do. But I mean that I miss the freedom and luxury of not having to think all the details / about everyone else. Everything is so much more of an effort, and I just basically really wish I'd stayed without children. I don't feel that parenting is particularly "rewarding" even when they do something pretty amazing - it's cute but I don't get any joy from it per se. Probably one of the only things in life that you genuinely can't change once it's happened. I don't want people of offer "fixes" on how I can do this or that. I guess I just wanted a safe space to voice my feelings because I can't really say this out loud in RL. I know this makes me a shitty human, but I can't help the feelings and sorrow I feel. I'm probably a bit depressed, but I know even if I am / even if I sort it I will always feel this way. Why didn't someone just me aside and tell me not to have them? I may well have listened!

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