Hello,
I thought I'd post on here as I have found the site helpful when pregnant, and especially now I'm experiencing a miscarriage. I wanted to post to share my experiences of medical management as an inpatient (I'd been terrified of this and struggled to find many posts in my position prior to this) and to seek some advice regarding expected management.
We attended our 12 week scan last week to find out baby stopped growing at 9+1. We were both completely shocked as I'd had no worrying symptoms and believed things were progressing well. An internal scan confirmed it. We were asked to attend the EPU to discuss next steps. We sat with the manager who explained our 3 options - expectant management, medical management as an inpatient as it dated over 9 weeks, or surgical. My bloods were also taken. We also discussed disposal which was awful for us to think about but required. I think at this point I still didn't quite believe it was happening and that there had been some mistake. It was our first pregnancy and miscarriage, with no previous children.
We opted for medical management and two days later were admitted to a local ward. My husband was allowed to stay with me throughout and the staff were lovely. I had 4 tablets initially, then 2 tablets every 3 hours having 4 doses in total. I was so scared as I'd heard it could feel like labour pains. I felt some mounting abdo/back pain after the first dose, but things only intensified for me after the second. At that point I accepted codeine. Shortly after I felt a spurt of clear fluid and the bleeding began after. The pain was really uncomfortable but felt manageable and I knew I needed to do it. I'd recommend taking lots of thick sanitary pads with you. Overnight I passed lots of clots and also what we understood was our baby. This felt quite serene to do, not as scary to look at as expected and I think helped give us some closure (but each to their own decision). After the 4 doses the nurses wanted me to be reviewed by medics before further decisions could be made. After the last dose the bleeding slowed down a bit. I had an internal scan in hospital (which was unpleasant whilst bleeding but the staff was so compassionate of our situation throughout), which later confirmed some retained tissue.
I spoke with the doctors who advised we had the 3 options again - expectant management, further medical management and surgical. There were no guarantees any would fully work and a risk of infection is always there. We were fed up of being in hospital, felt surgery felt extreme for us and also didn't want to do medication when it hadn't worked fully last time. So we chose to come home and see if my body does what it needs to naturally. Things have really slowed down since coming home 3 days ago, my bleeding is like a light period, with some brief clots when I wee. I'm hoping my body might reabsorb the tissue naturally or dispose of it but we're just playing the waiting game. I need to ring the EPU today to let them know if we've changed our minds re:surgery. I think we will watch and wait, and if nothing else has passed in a week see if we can have a scan to establish next steps. Has anyone else been in this position? It just feels like my body isn't doing what it needs to do. Also happy to answer any questions about medical management.
Big thanks to all previous posters, it really helped me get my head around missed miscarriages in those early days.
Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum.
Miscarriage/pregnancy loss
Missed miscarriage found at 12 week scan. Gestation dating 9w+1,followed by medical management and now expected management. Any other experiences of this?
Katiehod · 23/08/2021 08:08
I'm very sorry op 
I had a D&C 4 years ago. It was calm, quiet and a much better experience than I thought considering what it was we were going through.
The staff were amazing I couldn't fault them.
I burst out crying afew times and they were there to comfort for us both.
Like pp I tend to think back to that day quite often, with sadness and thinking how the hell did I do it. You find the strength.
Sending love
I'm so sorry for your loss. I had a missed miscarriage picked up by the 12 week scan but baby died at 8+3. the process had already started and my body expelled the baby and lots of blood later that day. They did medical management a couple of days later in hospital because i was still passing some placenta. but that didn't work because I still had some retained products which were detected in another scan, so I had surgical management 2 days after. The surgery was actually the least traumatic part of the whole experience. The surgery was recommended to me in the end because of my experience and also they said there was still a blood supply going to whatever was left.
It's been over 4 years now and I still think about those times, and wonder. I hope you can take the time you need to heal.
@FPower I'm so sorry you're still going through this. My position is similar, scanned nearly 2 weeks ago to find the gestation had stopped growing 3 weeks prior to that, so 5 weeks now in total. I have retained tissue which is not coming away and just feel in a total limbo. If nothing has happened by Tuesday I'll be opting for surgical as the medical management didn't work fully for me. I'm desperate to try again too and resolve this ongoing physical issue. It's such an awful position to be in, hoping you get sorted soon. 
@cadburyegg Your experience sounds similar to the position I'm in now. I'll be opting for the surgical route on Tuesday if expectant management is unsuccessful. My medical management helped me pass some tissue but not all and I have an ongoing blood supply to what's left. I never imagined the process of miscarriage would be so complex and drawn out. It's a really horrible time but my husband has been fantastic which I'm thankful for.
Thanks to all, apparently this is very common but I’d never heard of this type of miscarriage either. Seems such a cruel and drawn out process but I’m sure we will all get there. I keep been told everything looks healthy in there and it was the embryo that won’t have been right. That only makes me nervous that I have a problem with my eggs now! But I think that’s me been a natural worrier!
I exploded at my mum yesterday as she kept saying “is this normal??” Which I feel a bit bad about but just didn’t need it 
@FPower it's truly awful and I think any future pregnancies will naturally be wracked with anxiety if I get pregnant again. I think a few explosions are allowed at the moment, hopefully your mum understands 🤞this experience has definitely opened my eyes to what miscarriage actually is and how long these things can take. Thankfully I'm off work so not having to deal with too many people while my hormones are off the scale!
I have the option of local or general anaesthetic for the surgery but to be honest I think I'll go for general, I'm over being prodded and poked and would rather be asleep for the final bit!
I'll be thinking of everyone
Happened to us twice, both at 12 week scan 
Both times opted for surgical route. No problems whatsoever.
Sorry op. You will get through this.
Thankyou @Notashandyta I'm so sorry you went through it twice. In retrospect I wish I'd opted for the surgery originally but hopefully next week it'll happen!
@Girlwholifts A weekend away sounds lovely. Hope you managed to relax a bit how are you getting on today? I hope you're not too uncomfortable
@FPower Hope you're feeling a better today. Glad your OH is a good egg! Are you having the general anaesthetic or local for it? I'm booked in for a scan tomorrow to see if there is any tissue left, if it is it looks like they will do the surgery on Friday hopefully. I'm hoping the tissue has passed without me noticing, but feel relieved that it will be sorted one way or another by the weekend. I'll be glad to be out of this limbo and focus on recovering physically as best I can. It's been a long few weeks hasn't it! Hope everyone is holding up I've never eaten as much chocolate in my life. Funnily enough though my desire for coffee has never returned since going off it in pregnancy, and I used to love it! How bizarre ey xx
@Katiehod general anesthetic for me. I’m so relieved too so I know how you feel! They said I can start TTC in 2 weeks once I have a negative pregnancy test so that’s great news as we are having a weekend away in 2 weeks!! Feel so much more positive.
I also just ate a bar a galaxy in 10 minutes
How's it gone? @FPower I hope you're managing alright and all went as well as it can
I went for my rescan this morning. After some heavier bleeding and clots yesterday it had reduced down to 24mm. I had some bloods and a vaginal swab as I'd noticed the smell of the blood had been unpleasant, and saw a doctor to discuss the next steps. She was so lovely and we discussed surgery as a next option. She asked if she could examine me first, her and a very reassuring nurse took a look using a speculum. The doctor was able to remove the blood clots and after some further manouvre remove the retained tissue without surgery! Just alot of coughing and pushing on my part 
It was quite uncomfortable at times but felt more like a heavy pressure than anything. I felt so relieved that she's been able to remove it without further intervention. She said it was hanging low in my cervix so she suspected she could get it without needing surgery. So I'm really chuffed that that aspect is sorted. She has also prescribed me a weeks worth of two types of antibiotics as there is an infection brewing, so definitely mention it if any of you notice any scent to your bleeding. I didn't feel unwell but equally not myself either so it's been good to know that might have contributed. So hopefully things are now sorted and I can heal over the next few days. she also mentioned that my next period will be very heavy so that was helpful to know. Hope everyone is doing OK xx
@FPower I was so relieved and glad she was able to do it like that, I didn't have time to get anxious so it worked out quite well! She said to do a pregnancy test in 2 weeks, which would make it 7 weeks since the embryo stopped growing so hopefully no more intervention needed or retained products! I have a box of cheap ones so I'll probably do them once weekly to check on things though. So glad your surgery went well and you can recuperate now. Me and my husband both said in hindsight that we would have opted for surgery straight away rather than this mix of medical management and expectant management we ended in, particularly as its been so prolonged! But we had no idea what was for the best when we started this unexpected journey. I'm trying to feel in control so have been looking into TTC vitamins and lifestyle changes I can make for when we feel ready. I hope you can relax this weekend - we're away with friends but I'll keep a low profile with the dog, no hot tub or booze for me but I don't mind!
@Girlwholifts I'm so sorry you're still in the middle of it all. Its such a horrible process especially when services aren't as responsive in your area! We miscarried around the 9 week mark which would have been just over 5 weeks ago, but found out at the scan just over 2 weeks ago. I didn't get any bleeding at all until after my medical management, but once we returned home the bleeding was just like a mild period and nothing like I'd read other people had with tissue/large clots etc. It carried on like that for 2 weeks until Weds when I actually passed 2 larger clots/tissue and more blood (which was about half of the retained material). But to be honest without intervention I'm not sure how long it would have gone on for, my body just didn't seem to be doing what it needed to. Maybe my body would have done it eventually but the waiting is awful especially when you have a return to work looming. I think the waiting is the worst psychologically, emotionally and physically. Sending love xxxx
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