My due should have been next week

[mellongoose]

We had to have a TMFR at almost 21 weeks back in early January. My due date is next week.

My mum wanted to take me off for the day but I have a really busy unavoidable day with work. I was pleased to have the distraction. I've just jumped in my car for a few minutes at lunchtime and the radio was talking about ground breaking surgery for spina bifida babies in the womb.

We were told our baby was too poorly but I can't help but think....what if? Did they look hard enough? I miss my baby girl.

We are so very lucky to have a happy healthy DD but I think our lost baby was probably my last chance. I'm almost 43.

Not sure why I'm posting really other than just to get it all out before I go back into work.

[mellongoose]

Thanks @VenusStarr. I was lucky enough to access some counselling in the early days through work.

All the advice online is to go on and try again but we are both older and I'm scared of going through it again.

[VenusStarr]

I'm really sorry to hear about your baby girl @mellongoose 💜

I think the thoughts you are having are a normal part of the grieving process. Have you been offered any follow up support like counselling? It might help to process some of these thoughts.

Sending love xx

[mellongoose]

*due date