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Legal matters

Court order with baby dad domestics abuse any advise as to what would happen

1 reply

Girlmommy · 04/07/2022 19:18

So if you read my previous threads you will know that my ex the baby dad was abusive pushed me when pregnant shouting smashing things up ect , ss got involved my lo was born she was on child protection plan they did risk assessment on dad he was allowed contact at this point we told them we was separated when we wasn’t then it got dropped to child in need and then they close the case couple weeks ago I came out in the open to them about the truth we had still been together on and off half way through ( we’re not together now ) he has been pouring drinks on me shouting at me smashing my propert up in front of my lo, also how he takes drugs I told the social services all of this , I said I don’t want him seeing her anymore but he was blackmailing me to see her saying he would get her took of me if I didn’t let him. Anyway ss didn’t really seem concerned at all which shocked me abs said that he should still be allowed to see his lo and that if I stop him seeing her and it goes court he will get contact unsupervised anyway and that they normally ask ss to write a letter and it sounds to me like they’re gonna say dad is safe in the letter. I’m just baffled as when it first opened up before she was born the ss was against him seeing her all together but me being stupid let it still go on but now I don’t get why they think he’s safe to have her . He came to collect her the other day and I thought he was on drugs so I called the police and they said he’s on birth certificate nothing u can do he’s got same rights as me. Jusy dont know what to do anymore he wants me to go to mediation and sign a legal document saying he has her on set days but I don’t want to I don’t want him seeing her at all but I’m scared if he takes it to court he’s gonna be allowed contact which I don’t want I don’t want her growing up around his behaviours

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BeNice01 · 04/07/2022 21:49

Family court’s position is that a child should continue to see both parents as long as it’s safe to do so.

Furthermore the court consider a child’s relation with both parents separate to the relationship between the parents. E.g if you were abusive to the dad, even physically, the court would not stop your child from spending time with you.

However, this doesn’t mean that you should raise safeguarding concerns in court. The court might order that he enrolls in an anger management programme or that you both do a separated parents programme.

Mediation is a good start starting point for sharing concerns with him. You might want to discuss how you will coparent e.g. using a contact book(app) for handover notes, GP details etc.

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