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Find out all about large family cars, holidays and more right here.

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Larger families

Bedroom dilemma, what should I do?

20 replies

brazenhussy · 06/01/2009 19:07

I am currently seperated from my DH and have decided to move out of our family home (owned by DH) and into rented accomodation with our 4 dc.
The reason behind this was financial as I was worried about being a single parent with a large house to run and maintain after our divorce was final.
The house we are planning to rent is a three bedroom with an attic room. the attic room is great - fitted wardrobes, lovely big window and plenty of space. However it is accessed by a folding loft ladder only.
My DC are
girl 14
girl 11
girl 7
boy 6
None of them want to share with anyone else although they all know the final decision on this will be mine.
What should I do?
Loft bedroom is only suitable for one of the eldest two.
2nd and 3rd daughters really don't get on and am very reluctant to ask them to share.
3rd daughter gets on very well with her brother and vice versa. Would it be ok to give them the very large master bedroom and have half each or is that not really the done thing?
Any thoughts will be greatly appreciated

OP posts:

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whoingodsnameami · 06/01/2009 19:09

Can you not have the loft room?

muppetgirl · 06/01/2009 19:13

My dad coverted our loft into 2 bedrooms and they were great but he ddin't ever get round to putting in a permenant staircase due to planning permission (might want to check if the room actually has planning permission as this may have a bearing on insurance?) my brothers were 14 and 16 when we left and they had the rooms for a couple of years before we left. I would say the older children would be fine though do bear in mind they may lift the ladder to stop the other children getting up (my brothers did this with me) and that may mean you can't get at the rooms also...

Might be better to have the room yourself and let the older 2 share the next biggest bedroom?

frumpygrumpy · 06/01/2009 19:14

I think its a great idea to give them the biggest room to share. Then the others could have a room each and you the attic room? Sounds fab!

moshie · 06/01/2009 19:14

I would give the attic room to the 14 yr old and have the youngest two sharing, as they get on well and are closest in age.

NAB3lovelychildren · 06/01/2009 19:15

I would have thought you should have the loft room.

brazenhussy · 06/01/2009 19:15

Not really no because the hatch isn't big enough to get a double bed in even one that comes in two halves. I presume the furniture that is in there must have been built in there.

I would have been happy to otherwise though as I currently sleep in a loft bedroom and love it because it is so private and quiet.

OP posts:

KatyMac · 06/01/2009 19:15

Have a futon

muppetgirl · 06/01/2009 19:17

...my dad custom made the beds and desks and wardrobes in the eaves...

This is what makes me think this room doesn't have planning permission.

brazenhussy · 06/01/2009 19:50

no it doesn't have planning permission that is why they are renting it as a three bedroomed house

OP posts:

beanieb · 06/01/2009 19:56

I would make the two eldest share and the two youngest share. Would it be safe to allow a child to live in a room without planning permission which may be hard to get out of if there was a fire? I can understand why you wouldn't want the room yourself, imagine trying to get down in a hurry if something happened to one of the kids! Is it the only option?

2k9kids · 06/01/2009 19:58

Could you have the eldest 2 share and the youngest 2 share and then have the attic room as a cool play room/den for all of them as a peace offering?

juuule · 06/01/2009 20:06

I agree with the idea that the oldest 2 share and the youngest 2 share.

brazenhussy · 06/01/2009 20:12

beanieb - no, there is another option. There is a small sitting room downstairs that could possibly be used.

I quite like the idea of the two eldest and two youngest sharing. Wait til I put it to them, there will be a riot!

OP posts:

muppetgirl · 06/01/2009 20:12

I think there's a whole lot to consider here...

We are in a 3 storey house and have the kids above us so we can keep an ear out should they need us (we are on the middle floor with the living room and our 2 + soon to be 3 lovelies are all above)

When your eldest 2 are teenagers you may not want to be at the top of the house away from hearing what they're up too -I used to climb out the windows of our bungalow and do what I fancied!

Does the house have suitable locks on the front/back door. If I were a floor away from my children I would want to make sure no one could get in easily -we have had chubb locks fitted as we just had 1 lock that you had to lock behind you and leave the keys in the lock only I left them on a hook as I was worried someone could get them through the letterbox -not good in a fire as not everyone may know where they keys were.

As already said, would you be happy in a fire that you could get yourself and everyone out?

Does it have smoke alarms in the attic/house?

What downstairs rooms would you have? Could any of these be used as a bedroom?

muppetgirl · 06/01/2009 20:12

sorry x-posted re the downstairs rooms

brazenhussy · 06/01/2009 20:18

I am a registered childminder so would meet all the requirements regarding fire and evacuation. I don't really think that it would make a difference if my eldest child were in the loft or anywhere else if there was a fire and only one adult trying to evacuate 4 children.

OP posts:

brazenhussy · 06/01/2009 20:21

The landlord had 6 children himself and two of his children slept in a purpose built summerhouse in the garden. Don't really fancy my kids out there though, I wouldn't be able to sleep

OP posts:

LongStory · 06/01/2009 22:26

I grew up as one of five in a 3 bedroom house. It was a constant negotiation but we all agreed on a rotational schedule which took account of the main considerations and gave everyone some months when they had their own room; there was a special exception if you were preparing for exams but I can't remember exactly how that worked.

I remember it was always fun moving room and setting up stuff; lots of chances for clear-outs....

KingCanuteIAm · 06/01/2009 22:36

I think the two youngest can share - for now. How long are you planning to stay there?

My major concern with the attic would be lack of a fire escape window. There needs to be one large, fully opening window low down that the fire services can get their ladders to if needed. Missing that window is the main reason attics don't get PP, they are expensive to fit. If it has an emergency escape of some kind then I would be fairly relaxed about it - for the oldest child (not a younger one).

TBH, I am liking the two sharing option where they all share rooms - it seems fairest and safest overall - plus, having a chill out room just for the children would be really popular

KatyMac · 07/01/2009 07:26

I would put the 2 youngest together in the big bedroom - but with a thought to a room divider or separating it somehow

I would give each of the older 2 an upstairs room

I would have the dining room as my bedroom & the attic would be a play room - nothing ever to be downstairs

THEN I would explain to the older 2 that any bad behaviour on their part will result in them moving into the shared room, as it is only by privilege of age that they get this concession

Everyone is fairly happy & you have a nice big stick to use during difficult times

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