IVF - Would you make the same decision knowing what you do now?

[choochoo2]

Hi - Not sure if this is the right place to post this but hoping for some frank advice / feedback on the impact of IVF on your health. Obviously if it is successful it is amazing and you have created a new life, and I'm sure you wouldn't regret it, but were there any unexpected side effects? How many cycles did it take? I'm weighing up taking another few months of trying naturally, versus taking the plunge but I am 42 so time is running out. I've had bouts of ill health in the past and am worried the hormones might mess things up again. My doc is aware of my concerns and would put me on a short protocol.

Thanks in advance!
xx

[Blondeshavemorefun]

Hindsight

I wish we didn’t do two cycles in uk and wasted £12k

We did third in SPAIN and wish we looked abroad first - as so much cheaper and imo technology far better

But so scary doing ivf that you want local

Don’t

Chose the best clinic about for your age and medical situation

And yes at 42 very likely ivf will fail - tho obv some work and get preg - I was 42 with 3rd cycle abs abroad got better results and some to freeze

2nd fet is our daughter

If third had failed and none to freeze (like uk) then would have gone to donor eggs

What is your amh and fsh

I also wouldn’t down reg in Oct as means if abroad then flights more costly as ec and et end of Dec /early JAN

[Blue2014]

I was needle phobic before IVF so initially scared but for me the whole experience was fine, I had no side effects at all.

I was very lucky that our first cycle worked.

[itchyknees]

And yes it’s crazy expensive too, I stopped adding it all up in the end, we were going to do it so that was that. But given their stats it’s the closest you’ll get to buying your own baby and is less of a financial shot in the dark than somewhere cheaper but with worse results.

[itchyknees]

I did ARGC, it’s as full on as it gets, they pretty much own your life for the duration, but honestly, I can hardly remember it and would do it all again in a heartbeat.

[choochoo2]

Thanks so much everyone for your responses.

Consensus seems to be that:

1. it can be a uncomfortable and tiring but is totally worth it;
   
2. choose your clinic carefully;
   
3. perhaps look at genetic testing given my age;
   
4. and perhaps look at shorter / natural cycles given my health concerns.
   
   And the only regrets seem to be around not starting sooner!
   
   Tbh I hadn't thought about traveling further than Birmingham and had chosen my clinic based on other people's research. We haven't committed to anything yet so I will look around.
   
   Had a quick look at the ARGC website - their results look amazing, and they do seem to cater for old ladies who are more likely have complications, the downside being it can end up far more expensive than standard IVF and it's in London.
   
   I'll have a look at NURTURE in Nottingham and maybe see if I can find a clinic who can do tests to detect any auto immune issues, which I'm a little worried about.
   
   Thank you so much for your inputs, hopefully others will find this thread useful also.
   
   xx

[DameSylvieKrin]

Eurochick makes a good point about the mild stimulation, perhaps that’s something you want to look into if you are worried about side effects.

[eurochick]

On reflection, I wish I had cracked on with it earlier. Our plan was two children but we ended up with one. I really, really didn't want ivf and delayed started it, tried iui and other things first but ivf got the results.

I had horrible side effects from downregging when I tried long protocol but very little in the way of side effects from the mild/natural cycles that eventually worked.

[Justme1981]

Hi

I had one cycle of own egg which resulted in no eggs!! I then moved to donor egg & was successful first time. My side effects were weight gain, hot flashes & nausea from one of the drugs. If you are in the midlands i would highly recomend nurture in nottingham. I have 2 friends who were also successful on their first cycles there (one own egg one used donor egg) Im mid 30s they are both early 40s. We also donated remaining frozen embryos as we dont want more children, our receipient couple were also successful first time -
Which is amazing!! Their stats on on their own web pages, but i believe they are the best in the midlands & near top in uk. They definitely have better stats than care.
Good luck - its a tough journey but completely worth it. Best wishes

[Happyandshiney]

I had several rounds of IVF in my early thirties finally resulting in twins.

I managed the cycles themselves well enough although I did have a mild case of OHSS with my first cycle.

The problem of course is that if you are successful you don’t get a rest, because your body is then carrying a pregnancy and then once you deliver you don’t get a rest because you have a new baby (or babies in my case!) to look after.

It was absolutely worth it but it did take a lot out of me physically.

The position at 30 is also very different to the position at 40 so you are sensible to think it through.

Saying that my 40 yo friend recently had a gorgeous baby having breezed through pregnancy and Labour much better than I managed ten years ago!

Best of luck whatever you decide.

[Kaznet]

41 and pregnant now. Collected 15 eggs, 12 fertilized and all 12 made it to day 5. Put two in and both stuck, but lost one at week 11. Now week 17 with other and fingers crossed .
My regret is not paying the extra to test them. I have 4 frozen and maybe would like to try for a second it would be good to know if any have abnormalities.
I traveled to go to clinic as my local has terrible stats for my age range.
I had great doctor who made me wait til all the conditions were right on the month I started. Meant a delay and extra money on scans but it was worth it in the end. I wouldn't wait to lose weight etc. From my experience anyway there are enough delays before you actually get started.

[DameSylvieKrin]

You could have your ovarian reserve tested to see if you can wait a few months.
I had three cycles and a lot of side effects, though not OHSS. A mistake was made during the second pick-up and I had some pain for three months. I'm 26w pregnant and have had a very hard pregnancy. I now have a complication likely to be related to IVF that can endanger the baby (vasa previa).
I'd still do it again in a second. I wanted to know that I'd tried the routes available to me.

[Colbu24]

Persipan I had 8 eggs but they implanted 2 fertilised ones, the others didn't make it. Then only one embryo survived. I didn't have any left to try again.
The treatment was at The Priory in Edbaston here in Birmingham.
They were amazing.

[Verbena87]

I did IVF in order to use PGD to avoid passing on a genetic condition, so a bit different in that (as far as tests can demonstrate) we’re both fertile, but maybe some useful bits even so.

I found the hormones quite tough (nausea, being a sweaty mess etc) and ended up with ‘kissing ovaries’ from stimulation (so swollen they were rubbing against each other) which meant a week off work in quite severe discomfort.

However, 12 eggs retrieved, 11 fertilised (via ICSI which is standard for PGD cycles), 4 made it to day 5, and amazingly all 4 were clear of the genetic condition. 1st frozen embryo transfer resulted in my son, and the other 3 are still in the freezer for another try. Totally worth the night sweats, needles and bellyache!

I was 29 at egg collection and DH was 32.

[mommybear1]

Hi @choochoo2 feel free to DM me on this topic having used this clinic and Dr I absolutely second third and fourth what @itchyknees says don't go with your gut - go with hard facts and figures. I do not mean to be offensive here but time is not on your side the stats for CARE for your age group are not as good as Nurture for example. I went with gut and "feelings" for my first two unsuccessful attempts and hard facts for my third - changes to my diet and vitamin intake etc led to a successful natural pregnancy at 38 and birth at 39.

[HappyHedgehog247]

I’m on second cycle. I’m 43. I wish I’d tried even a year ago. If you want to get your body in shape you could read ‘it starts with the egg’ and ‘baby making bible’. I’ve found the injections easy. I wish I had started sooner.

[Twickerhun]

I had one round of ivf which worked well. No negative impacts on my health although the drugs did leave me tired, hormonal, bloated and struggling but that only lasted for a few days. From one round of ivf o got four embryos. Two are still frozen one is a beautiful DS the other is my beautiful DD. I’d do it again in a heart beat. I was 38 when we started treatment I’m 40 now. My only regret was waiting too long to start.

[choochoo2]

Hi Persipan - I haven't been able to find the stats except for those on the HFEA website which are quite general - and in those the centers equalled the national average. We are seeing Dr Rajkhowa who was thought to be the best in Midlands, or at least that's what my friend found when she was researching IVF 3-4 years. She has moved to CARE Birmingham, which has only been open a few months. The staff there seem friendly and professional. Dr Rajkhowa, herself, is very pleasant and straight talking.

Hi Colbu24 - They found 7 follicles when they did the initial internal so I guess I'd be looking at similar numbers to you, as a best case. Glad it worked out for you and thanks for sharing your story.

[Persipan]

Colbu24, I'm hoping you mean all but one fertilised, or else that was a clinic with some startling practices regarding how many embryos to transfer!

[Colbu24]

Hi I have one successful cicle of IVF at 37. I didn't suffer any side effects and I had a great pregnancy.
My attitude was very relax and positive and I was willing to accept the outcome either way.
I only produced 8 eggs and all except one implanted.
We were going to try twice and give up. After I gave birth we decided not to try again.
I didn't found the treatment hard or stressful but I'm in the minority.
Best of luck

[itchyknees]

What were the consultsnt’s stats at their last place like?

The most expensive cycle is one that doesn’t work and to be frank at 42, you need to get your best shots in first, not wait for it to fail.

Look at Lister in London or Care, or ARGC.

[choochoo2]

Hi Perispan - Hope the next one sticks!! We'll try with my eggs to start, but aware we may need to move on to donor ones.

Hi itchyknees - Sounds like it was definitely the right choice for you! Congratulations :-) The clinic I am going with is new, but the consultant is very experienced and highly recommended.

Your replies are helping! Thank you :)

[itchyknees]

I had 2 cycles, both successful, first at 38, second at 39. Choose your clinic carefully, look at their stats and how many women they’re treating of your age group.

[Persipan]

No success yet - I started trying at 38; I'm now 41 and on to donor eggs.

[choochoo2]

Hi Persipan,

Thanks for replying! :-) Yes, it's a matter of weighing everything up and you're not being harsh at all, it's a fact that the chances of success are low at 42, though the consultant thinks I should respond well (for my age). She doesn't think it's worth trying IUI (given my age), so it would be straight to IVF.

How old are/were you when you tried if you don't mind me asking? And were you successful?

I've had a couple of infections in the last month so I think these, plus some nerves, are playing on my mind. Was supposed to be starting this month, but might give myself another month or two to lose some weight and generally focus on my health and then hit it with all we've got! ;-)