I can't take this anymore

[anonymous229]

I just don't have the energy for anything. Today has been cold, grey and miserable and there's nowhere to fucking go because everywhere is closed. Yes there's the local park but I've been there about 500 times since March and I'm bored sick of it.

How much longer can they keep us in this fucking awful state? I've had enough, I'm drained, I'm depressed as hell.

We've sacrificed so damn much for a virus that kills about 1% of people who catch it. I know that sounds callous but I'm facing the loss of my job (I'm self employed in events - ha!) and potentially my home because of this. The toll it's taken on my mental health is disastrous, but I feel like me and my family (and other families like us) are just collateral in all of this.

I know people will probably say things like we're lucky to be alive, but I don't feel lucky.

I can't live like this any longer.

[Porcupineinwaiting]

@Inkpaperstars spot on.

[WouldBeGood]

I think that post is very unkind.

[Ridcully82]

@Inkpaperstars

All the things people find difficult and restrictive about the current situation are very similar to the experience of those struck by certain chronic illnesses. I became ill virtually overnight in my mid twenties and the consequences are immense.....lack of mobility and ability to do any activities you used to do, loss of job and capacity to earn, loss of home, loss of friendships and social contact, becoming housebound, poor mental health. The difference for many experiencing these issues in lockdown is that they may not in physical pain, have more hope of an end point at which they can start to recover, they have often already had children or married or gained significant work experiexce and those things will still be there for them going forward, and they don't have the isolation of being the one person around them going through this while everyone else carries on.

Prior to covid, what did you do to try and help those who, equally through no fault of their own, were in these circumstances? Realistically there is probably little you could do, but for many it wasn't even on their radar.

Some of you who are struggling now will make better recoveries from all this because you have been lucky enough up till now to have the health and opportunity to have children, to build friendships, to have a job or buy a home. Some will bear the impact of multiple pre existing issues too.

I do think everyone has the right to complain and vent to their heart's content, go for it. Just bear in mind that what you are experiencing is not new, the fact that it isn't your fault is not new...these things have been happening to people for all time and mostly no one cared.

Agree with this

[WouldBeGood]

When I had my baby I was out every day to save my sanity. I really feel for you people with little ones and no outings

[Arosadra]

You were going to be on maternity leave for some of this time anyway, which isn't a great time to get out and do things.

I don’t get this at all. I was never home when I was on maternity leave and getting out and seeing people was essential to my sanity.

I’m not finding covid restrictions difficult. But ten years ago with a small baby and a toddler I struggled to stay in for a single day. I think I would have lost my mind if I had to do it for months on end.

That isn’t especially helpful OP, I know, but I’m trying to say that anyone would feel like this in your position and it’s absolutely understandable

[Gwlondon]

Wow. What has happened to mumsnet.

[monkeytennis97]

@GetOffYourHighHorse education staff.

[GetOffYourHighHorse]

'Some only care about vulnerable /disabled/elderly etc when they can use them as a tool to emotionally blackmail others.'

What a bizarre thing to say. Have you any examples to back up this announcement?

[WouldBeGood]

@MercyBooth well said.

I had a nasty feeling too

[MercyBooth]

Prior to covid, what did you do to try and help those who, equally through no fault of their own, were in these circumstances

@Inkpaperstars This bothered me for months and it took me a while to articulate it. Finally it dawned.............Some only care about vulnerable /disabled/elderly etc when they can use them as a tool to emotionally blackmail others.

[Inkpaperstars]

All the things people find difficult and restrictive about the current situation are very similar to the experience of those struck by certain chronic illnesses. I became ill virtually overnight in my mid twenties and the consequences are immense.....lack of mobility and ability to do any activities you used to do, loss of job and capacity to earn, loss of home, loss of friendships and social contact, becoming housebound, poor mental health. The difference for many experiencing these issues in lockdown is that they may not in physical pain, have more hope of an end point at which they can start to recover, they have often already had children or married or gained significant work experiexce and those things will still be there for them going forward, and they don't have the isolation of being the one person around them going through this while everyone else carries on.

Prior to covid, what did you do to try and help those who, equally through no fault of their own, were in these circumstances? Realistically there is probably little you could do, but for many it wasn't even on their radar.

Some of you who are struggling now will make better recoveries from all this because you have been lucky enough up till now to have the health and opportunity to have children, to build friendships, to have a job or buy a home. Some will bear the impact of multiple pre existing issues too.

I do think everyone has the right to complain and vent to their heart's content, go for it. Just bear in mind that what you are experiencing is not new, the fact that it isn't your fault is not new...these things have been happening to people for all time and mostly no one cared.

[Gwlondon]

anonymous229 I am sorry so many people posted who have completely forgotten the baby stage. Pre 2020 having a newborn baby was one of the most lonely miserable time I have ever had. I used to go to the train station to wait for my husband to come home because I was so lonely. It was easier second time because at least I had school mums as acquaintances and knew more people.

A big hug my lovely. There are other people that feel like you walking the same parks trying their best to keep going. I used to go to baby groups and while they didn’t actually help with the relentlessness of it at least now I know random people from those groups.

This lockdown they have given permission for support groups for new mums to keep going. Please find them. Local Facebook? There are other people who feel the same and it will pass. They will be free ones because some second timers will know how important it is to support new mums. Search within a local group to see if anyone has posted.

A big hug in solidarity. This has been an awful year and you are right to reach out.

Ps I only got to page 8 so maybe people were nicer later on. FGS! This is mumsnet, new mums are the bread and butter of mumsnet.

[Cantata]

Inuet,

I can't think of anything to say that isn't a cliché, because this is a truly awful situation. I have had similar thoughts to yours, and I know I'm not the only one on here.

@anonymous229 How are you today? I gave my life spurious meaning by collecting a prescription.

[BlueBlancmange]

@inuet

The continuing restrictions are ruining lives and will continue to do so beyond the end. I am close to the end of my rope. I feel like I hate everything and everyone; even this site has become utterly toxic and full of self-righteous coronoqueens patronising the shit out of everyone. I honestly wish I could slip into a coma and awake when it ends and not awake if it doesn't

The vaccine news is looking very promising. It's likely things will start to look up very soon.

[inuet]

The continuing restrictions are ruining lives and will continue to do so beyond the end. I am close to the end of my rope. I feel like I hate everything and everyone; even this site has become utterly toxic and full of self-righteous coronoqueens patronising the shit out of everyone. I honestly wish I could slip into a coma and awake when it ends and not awake if it doesn't

[MercyBooth]

@GetOffYourHighHorse Im not complaining about waiting till Sept 17th for my hair. I CHOSE to wait. Because i was being sensible.

Just because i would like to visit one other household at Christmas doesnt make me irresponsible or selfish.

[jessstan1]

anonymous, I am so, so sorry for how you are feeling. When I read your opening post a while back, I had no idea you had three young children at home, had the impression you were on your own and could please yourself (like me). Having kids puts a completely different complexion on the situation; indeed, those with children have it harder than others at the moment.

Regarding your work, I see you are in the 'events' business. I have a close relative who is a musician, used to touring all over the world, and everything has come to a standstill on that front, here and abroad. It is a very uncertain time.

I do hope the vaccine is available soon, anonymous, and that you can avail yourself of it quickly. It will make such a difference to all our lives. Hang on to that thought and please take care of yourself.

[WouldBeGood]

Totally agree @anonymous229

[Pikachubaby]

@GetOffYourHighHorse what are things like for you? What sort of job do you have? How is your industry affected? Is your home secure?

Just wondering where you’re coming from really

As I can’t quite get your relaxed approach to restrictions and how you think they are not a big deal (if I got that right?)

[GetOffYourHighHorse]

'Older people dying is not ok”....do you expect them to live forever?'

Oh you're just being silly now. Of course no one lives forever however it is very convenient to think all these people dying are already at an end of life stage. That just isn't true, many live full active lives. Have you not seen the news at all in recent months? Many requiring critical care with long protracted recoveries are younger people and I'm sure that really impacts mental healthy. So again, restrictions aren't great but they are necessary. It isnt just this country that restrictions are in place.

A vaccine is coming, the end is in sight.

[Nicknacky]

GetOffYourHighHorse “Older people dying is not ok”....do you expect them to live forever? Many of the elderly will have been in care homes where social distancing is impossible.

And I’m fitter at 42 than many 20 year olds, so I’m not sure what your point is about fitness.

[etopp]

@GetOffYourHighHorse

I'm not ignoring it or apologising thanks. You said 'And let’s be realistic, it is mainly the elderly that die from this. That is a fact' which imo minimises deaths in older people. Everyone's life counts.

No - it's a fact. A plain, straightforward fact. Why is it so hard for you to acknowledge this, @GetOffYourHighHorse ?

[mangomemory]

@GetOffYourHighHorse

'How do you imagine any of this ok for anyone, '

None of it is ok, however restrictions are necessary in a pandemic not quite sure what else there is to say. You don't have to like it of course, who does, but there has been massive financial support furlough etc. It isn't as if nothing has been done.

Nackers, I've plenty of bottle thanks. I'll say it again older people dying is not ok and high numbers are avoidable if people stick to social distancing etc. Many 80 year olds are fitter than some 50 yr olds.

I work via a limited company because I'm quite frankly not a good employee as my child had significant needs and need flexible working and often a lot of time off. As a result of my flexible wiring arrangements suited to my personal circumstances I got 0 financial support. I took a dividends in April to pay the bills ruling out Universal credit. I am not the only one in that situations.

I am also a mental health professional who during first lockdown barely survived mentally: to say people are just bored is appalling. People are developing serious mental health problems for the first time into their lives. Some have had their existing mental health issues exacerbated to the point they are barely coping. A bit of a relax in July meant nothing. Where I live we went into higher measures and the onto tier 3,

It's a fact of life that meant elderly people have multiple health conditions and there is the final thing that ends their life. Flu is a common one. It's not that on it's own that does it. It'a the final straw, for many it has been Covid if not that it would have been something else in close time proximity.

[GetOffYourHighHorse]

I'm not ignoring it or apologising thanks. You said 'And let’s be realistic, it is mainly the elderly that die from this. That is a fact' which imo minimises deaths in older people. Everyone's life counts.

[Nicknacky]

GetOffYourHighHorse No you don’t 😂

You made an appalling comment and not you are ignoring it as you know you were out of order. Own it or apologise.

And thanks for everyone else’s sympathy, I feel like a fraud now as it was four years ago