Lockdown alone or go to MILs ...

[Tiredmumssquad]

Hey really struggling on what to do..

DP is away with work and will be away at least the next 3 months so its just me and my 1 year old DS if we go into lockdown I really dont know if i could cope with just us two.. DPs mum has said I can go stay there but really unsure what to do!! Help what would you do?!

[lightyearsahead]

I think you should go. Not everyone is the same & I think fro the sound of it you need the company.
Pack as much as you can, take toys and books, laptop, chargers and anything else you might need. If it is too much you can always go home, I think that would be allowed depending on distance.

[Justkeeprollingalong]

Does she live within walking distance ? If yes then you could wait a bit but if not you should go now.

[puds11]

I think it’s best if you go. Good luck

[Powerplant]

Yes I would go - start packing and good luck 💐

[MRex]

You don't want to be on your own with just a one year old for months, much better to go and stay there. You're making the right decision. Depending on how far away they are (if you're in the same town) you're unlikely to be unable to leave and just return home if you want to later on.

[Hyrana]

Go, but do it now!

[Pinkandpurplehairedlady]

I’m planning on staying with my ex-MIL if we go into lockdown so she’s not on her own. She’s not in a high risk group and is great with the kids. Luckily we still get on well!

[NChangeForNoReason]

Don't wait... sounds like ur struggling already! Go now as ur son needs a mum with a healthy mind!!

[Blondewolf]

Go.

I'm also scared about being the only adult and obsessing and it all being weird 🥺. If I had a really young child I'd definitely go in a household with more adults.

[Tiredmumssquad]

Thanks everybody for your help I was up most of last night worrying what to do for the best

[SnowsInWater]

Glad to hear you are going, I think that’s a sensible decision. Much better to have people around you who can support each other.

[Tiredmumssquad]

Yeah I'm going to go will start getting stuff organized today and get ready to go.. will stay at home until lockdown is announced then will head straight to her house..

[Seventyone72seventy3]

From what you've written here I would definitely go.

[meredithgrey1]

I would go.
We're going to stay with my PIL for the whole of next week at least. All four of us are working from home and they've offered (practically insisted actually, but in a nice way) that we come and then we can split caring for DD (9 months) between us so neither DH or I have to take any unpaid leave. They are both under 60 and healthy.

[littlebillie]

I would go, great for you and your child. You may not get on all of the time but it is being part of family we will fall out some of the time.

The main thing is that if you are ill or your baby you have spare hands to help.

[Tiredmumssquad]

@chillimum im worried if I'm alone I will become obsessed with watching the news and reading online what's happening and I really think my MH would go downhill! Yes I will help around the house and do mines and DSs washing and stuff just like I do at home.. MIL is going to give me her room at the front off the house so they shouldn't hear DS and they are generally up really early anyway due to SILs work

[amiapropermum]

How will MIL and SIL cope with night wakings? My son is a great sleeper now but wasn't for the first 18 months. When my dad was in hospital last year I stayed with my mother for two weeks (she has a health condition and can't stay alone) but she hated being woken during the night and early in the morning.

[recycledbottle]

If your MIL and SIL are nice and won't be irresponsible, I would go. Especially if you struggle without company. Some ground rules re space, do help around the house and it will be fine.

[ChilliMum]

I would go, we are in France and have only been on lockdown for a few days but you will appreciate the company (it's a really long day) and you will keep each other sane - I am not generally a worrier but it's really easy to get obsessed with this as everytime I turn on the news or pick up my phone there is an update on how many people have died - having dh to talk to and make plans with is helping me get moving everyday.

It also means you will have someone to help share the childcare and you wont have to take your ds to the shop.

I think the advantages massively outweigh the disadvantages a d you will have a room there you can go to when it's all too much.

[Tiredmumssquad]

DS doesn't sleep well at home and when he has stayed at MILs hes just slept the same. Think I will go.

[elastamum]

If she is early 50s and healthy then you both will likely be fine and your child will be better cared for by two of you. I am in my 50s and I have a house full of students now. I don't consider myself vulnerable. Not being alone is much better for your mental health. .

[somewhereovertherainbow2]

I couldn't do it, for various reasons but mostly because I like my own space... I lived alone for 3 years and loved it!

[Tiredmumssquad]

Well MIL is talking doing some maintenance around the house to keep busy.. at the start they weren't taking it seriously but they are now, probs just about as serious as me.. I'm also worried if I did catch it and couldn't look after DS. He also doesn't sleep through the night so the thought of him being up during the night then stuck in all day I'm actually pretty scared how I'd manage but I dont want to uproot him... ahh just dont know anymore

[AnyOldSpartabix]

I’d probably go. Relationship may be strained, but sharing the load is probably better than being alone.

[amiapropermum]

How would it work with DS? mine is a good sleeper at home but anywhere else or out of routine he doesn't sleep well and we're both exhausted. I'm a single mum from day 1 so used to being on my own with him. If you think he'll just roll with it and you are confident you'll get on well with MIL and SIL without any issues then it's a good idea