How is this self-isolation?

[Quarantino]

Friend, "L", vulnerable category as chronic health conditions (although young). Has announced they're self-isolating for 12 weeks, not too big a deal as they don't go out too much normally due to said health conditions.
However their spouse is continuing to go to work in an office for the foreseeable future until they can get set up to work from home. And presumably to shops etc as they won't have food etc for 12 weeks (will offer to help though).

Unless the spouse is the only one in the office, L is still basically as much at risk as would be if L was the one going into the office, right? Anything spouse picks up will be going straight back to L. They are very very unlikely to be distancing between themselves at home.

I don't want to get cross at them but this is not self-isolating?! Or AIBU?

[WyfOfBathe]

What do you want them to do? You've said yourself that her DP needs to make money and buy food, so presumably they're doing the best they can to keep her safe

If they were showing symptoms and supposed to be self-isolating, I would understand being angry that he was putting others at risk. But currently it's only about how it affects her, and she's presumably agrees that her DP working is the best solution.

[ChillinInMyBacta]

*Too many SPAG's to count. The offer of shopping was made...

[ChillinInMyBacta]

My SIL's DB & DN got caught on a cruise ship for a week with some friends outside Sydney. They only returned to 5heir small coastal town yesterday, and we're supposed to self-isolate for 14 days.

Well my SIL received a telephone call that the wife of the friends was out shopping at the local supermarket when she was spotter by mutual friends who knew she the family was supposed to be in isolation. Once she realised she had been spotted she did a runner. The of shopping had been made by many people including my SIL The whole family is sick.

The Australian Government is just taking people's word that they will self-isolate. They have resisted putting people up in hotels which is ridiculous as their are no tourists that would need to be accommodated elsewhere.

[Iminaglasscaseofemotion]

Why are you complaining about this. Is it any of yiur business? Should her dp stop working and not get any shopping in for them?

[hamalooya]

Just because you report a post and it gets deleted still doesn't make you right I wouldn't bother replying to op she doesn't want to hear your opinion only wants you to agree with her

[Yabadee]

I’m hoping I’m not in an at risk category. I do take immunosuppressants but not for any of the reasons listed. My doc told me the other day my condition isn’t one that accelerates it so not be too concerned. Plus I’ve come off my meds now at recommendation of my consultant.

I don’t know how I would self isolate for 12 weeks. I’m on my own with DD5 as DP works away. He’s probably going to be locked down in London if it happens. I’d try to stay in as much as possible of course, but I can’t keep her in for 12 weeks. I’m going insane on day 4 of our 2 weeks 😔 I hope to god they don’t call me on Monday

[Quarantino]

Why on earth do you think I'm not in a vulnerable group? I've written twice now that she barely went out, and once you've read it as she went out and met 50 ppl every day and once that she never went out at all. I'm assuming you're on the windup, or not really interested in reading things properly, which I could do without.

In case you're for real and do need it spelling out, I'm bothered in case she gets severely ill. If either of them get symptoms and think that self isolation is what they've been doing and they carry on then I'm bothered in case anyone gets severely ill.

[hamalooya]

So now she didn't go out at all?

Well maybe friends/family visited her before.

Also they are clearly taking precautions by getting the husband to work from home but things need to be put in place to get to that stage.

Honestly why are you so bothered by this? Let it go. Why don't you ring her up and tell her what a idiot she is will that make you feel better and confirm you are right the point you are totally missing is at least if she feels like she is taking some steps to help herself maybe it might be helping her cope with the whole situation of being considered high risk. Again count yourself lucky you don't have the daily worry that you fall into that group.

[feelingverylazytoday]

You're supposed to self isolate as much as you can in your home, so ideally you would have a bedroom with an ensuite to yourself, and stay in there. Another member of the household leaves you food outside the door. Everyone has to be careful about washing hands etc. That is ideal. Of course it's not going to happen in many families.
It simply isn't possible to isolate everyone who needs it, that's why everyone should be doing everything they possibly can to reduce transmission risks.

[Quarantino]

She doesn't though, as I said in the very first post. She doesn't normally go out due to her health conditions. She normally meets one health professional a week and that's about it. So hardly anything is changing for her.

[Oysterbabe]

Can you explain why her husband going into work as normal while she stays at home cuts her risk by half? He will interact with eg. 50 people, who are all interacting with 50 other people, etc.

Because if she was going about her life as normal then she would meet 50 people too, she's reducing that to 1.

[hamalooya]

Where did the 50 people x 50 people come from?

2 people meeting people all throughout the day. One who is vulnerable stays at home thereby the amount of contact is immediately halved.

Also why are you getting cross at someone else making a decision about their health??

OP - am I being unreasonable?

Everyone- yes!

OP- no I'm not
Goodnight and try not to lose sleep over your friends life choice.

[ShowYourself]

Official advice isn’t that your entire family need to self isolate.

[Quarantino]

I'm sure your a great friend to 'L' if you think her health doesn't matter and she should just carry on as normal

Did you read my OP? I think she should do the opposite of carrying on as normal, and so should her husband. Unfortunately they can't, as they need to work and eat.

Can you explain why her husband going into work as normal while she stays at home cuts her risk by half? He will interact with eg. 50 people, who are all interacting with 50 other people, etc.

[hamalooya]

It's actually called 'shielding' the higher risk/vulnerable group and does cut down their risk by at least half. I would stop being judgemental about people who are basically being told your in the death group potentially if you catch this virus. Focus on actually seeing how difficult a time this will be for them. I'm sure your a great friend to 'L' if you think her health doesn't matter and she should just carry on as normal

[OhLookHeKickedTheBall]

I think only the most vulnerable are going to be told to self isolate. They're meant to be given advice specific to their situations. I really hope they get it.

The other vulnerable but not so vulnerable are meant to undergo more extreme social distancing - I think that's the category I'll fall in. Currently DH is wfh as a standard with his company but we unsure how long that will go on for. We're assuming he will be returning to the office before the 12 weeks ends for me. We need him to work so it'll have to be done.

[Gibble1]

It’s basically what we are doing apart from DS is L and DH and I are still having to go to work and I am frontline NHS. And also potentially got exposed today without ppe on. And I am also in an at risk category as are the majority of my colleagues but we aren’t going away for 12 weeks because we are terrified about what will happen to our future patients with nobody to look after them.
Advice hasn’t been forthcoming about what frontline vulnerable staff should do but we know that that is because they simply have so much to sort out at the moment that they are firefighting.

[Oysterbabe]

It's social distancing and better than nothing.

[nonicknameseemsavailable]

I am supposed to self isolate for 12 weeks looking at the info about who is vulnerable but whilst we need food and kids are at school and husband has to work me staying in is as good as we can do

[Quarantino]

I just think it's all so muddled. There are thousands of vulnerable people who should be reducing as much contact as possible, and trying their best to do so, but it's not possible with no grocery delivery slots or home working as standard, so what are they supposed to do?
Then loads of people just going out to pubs and shops etc as usual spoiling everyone else's efforts.

[Quarantino]

I wouldn't really get cross with them, I just felt irritated that they seemed like they were confused about what isolation meant and not actually taking it seriously. But clearly there is nothing else they can really do. I'm just generally upset about it all.

[Topseyt]

Spouse may not have the choice about going into the office. Some are not set up for working from home, and not all employers are so cooperative.

In practical terms, they are probably doing the best they can.

[Quarantino]

I don't know what else they could do either. But surely it's not isolation if you're living with someone who's basically living as usual (the spouse doesn't socialise much either!)

If either of them showed symptoms I'm sure spouse would stay at home.

If there was quick efficient testing at least the spouse could be tested regularly in this case (ideally, obv - not going to happen). Or the workplace colleagues.

[namemypuppyplz]

Why would you be cross with them for using the wrong terminology?