My stressed 17 year old daughter

[Helenpat123]

Im having a lot of trouble with 17 year old daughter. She is stressed out and got ungraded marks in A level mocks. Im always there for her but shes pushing me away swearing at me all the time its taking it`s toll on me. She cries a lot. School have been in touch as she cried a lot on Friday. She is now even more mad at me for telling them stuff. No getting through she only wants to talk to her boyfriend. Help,

[Helenpat123]

Hi thanks for the advice. It`s a difficult time and stressing everyone. Walking on eggshells all the time. She was a bit better on Saturday but maybe as no 6th form next day. She is very angry towards me for discussing things with 6 form but they did contact me. It may help her to talk to someone.

[holeinmyheart]

This is difficult. If she won't communicate with you then what about writing a letter to her and posting it. Along the lines of , you love her and naturally enough as you love her, you find it unbearable that she is so sad. You contacted the school because you were at your wits end and as she feels unable to speak to you, you were frantically seeking places to go to get help.
You acted out of unselfishness for her ( she knows this anyway)

You are her nearest and dearest so she can behave badly towards you. You are to be congratulated really as she trusts you enough to behave like she is doing. She feels safe with you, painful as it must be.

Every crisis I have been through with my children, who are now adult was harder for me. I think I worried more than them. They cried and off loaded on me, treated me and their Dad on occasion, with contempt, and then they were OK. I wish I had remained calmer really. I think that's all you can do. Write a letter, detailing how you feel and how you will always be there for her and then step back.
At least she has her boyfriend to talk to. It may not be as bad as your imagination is thinking it us.