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Behaviour/development

4yrs child told teacher mummy smacked me

6 replies

EmmyDA · 15/05/2022 12:15

Hello,
I went to pick up my child from nursery a d the teacher told me my child told her I smack her. Teacher was astonished because my child is a lovely child, helps an is sociable and likes playing etc. She didn't expect her to say that. It is a surprise to me because I never hit or smack at all, never did since she was born. Teacher raised it as a safeguarding concern as part of the school policy and informed me about it. Teacher and I spoke to my child and she kept quiet and was pulling my arm asking me to leave. She didn't want me and teacher to talk about it. Teacher told me not to worry and that I should speak with my child about it.
My child has been recently making up stories and I encouraged her because I read that children at her age will use their imagination. I honestly didn't expect it to go this far. Should I encourage my child being creative and what do to about the school incident?

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EmmyDA · 24/05/2022 09:21

Thank you for the advice. Yes I am collaborating with her teacher to read stories to the whole group about telling lies, etc. Then my child came to me and said that it is not nice to tell lies, I asked her why then she said because it makes us sad.
I consider my child a friend and we always do this: let's talk and I share my day with her and she does the same when she feels like talking (she always initiates the let's talk thing). So I think it's a part of the learning, whatever they catch from school and talk about with their friends, they just try it at home. I still feel like why would a child who is having full attention from their parent, would still say something like that (I'm a single parent and she doesn't have any direct contact with her father)... it was sad and started questioning ny own parenting as I thought either I'm overdoing it ornot doing it right.

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AgataFamilyDate · 24/05/2022 07:59

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Crazyhousewife · 22/05/2022 08:04

my son did this once he has autism/adhd and it was clearly for attention as when I asked him about it he smirked the whole time. I was annoyed but the problem is I don’t think he realised the consequences of that situation. So I had to explain to him what could happen if he lied about things like that and how they could actually take him away. I really didn’t want to have to tell him that but our area was a nightmare for childrens services so I had to be blunt. He never lied again about things like that and if anything it helped improve the communication between us; he has told me everything since.

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BlueChampagne · 17/05/2022 10:26

I hope that your meeting goes well EmmyDA.

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EmmyDA · 16/05/2022 19:48

I have an appointment with the teacher again to update her with the situation especially aftermy discussion with my child. Basically my child looked me in the eyes and insist that I hit her when she is naughty. I don't even do naughty spot with her because she is usually (not to say most of the time) easy to deal with and all she wants is playing and doing everything she wants... my child is so sweet and her smile is just so contagious that even when I'm upset she knows how to make sense laugh and forget... Is she seeking attention (same as she gets at home) at school with her teacher? I will ask the teacher about the PSHE I didn't know about it until I googled it after reading your message. I'm not used to the educational system in here. Thanks for your reply.

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BlueChampagne · 16/05/2022 13:21

If it's a one-off, I doubt you'll hear more from the school about it. They will be used to children making stuff up. Encourage her to make stuff up but try to explain in an age-appropriate way that she could have got Mummy into trouble. Though by her reaction, I suspect she already knows she's gone too far on this one.

You could ask the teacher if they cover anything like this in PSHCE?

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