Child Protection / Mental Health

[MS2015]

A Child Protection Conference has been called next week to discuss risks Social Services believe are posed to my unborn baby by my mental health difficulties (Borderline Personality Disorder & pre-natal depression/anxiety) and difficulties in my marriage (instability of relationship & arguments).

This is causing me much anxiety and distress as, whilst I welcome all support being offered and have co-operated fully with all agencies, I feel a Child Protection Plan would place me under unfair and unnecessary pressure and only increase tensions in my relationship and my life in general. I am 8 months pregnant and stressed enough as it is!

I have an advocate from Rethink attending the Conference with me and am getting friends to write supporting statements about their faith in me and my husband to safeguard our child ourselves.

Anyone have any advice?

[cashewnutty]

if you had me as your SW you wouldn't midg the intrusion as i am generally lovely. Maybe you will be allocated a very lovely and understanding SW who can help you.

[cashewnutty]

The other thing i can say is that some times CPCC's are called because of previous issues. I had one family where the woman had 4 children and all but one had been removed from her care for a number of reasons (violent relationship and alcohol misuse to name 2 issues). She met another man and moved to our area and had another child. The child went on the register before birth. But it was evident quickly that this new relationship was fantastic and the child came off he register quickly and they have been left to get on with raising their child.

[MS2015]

My levels of distress in meetings with midwives (I have had some quite alarming meltdowns in front of them because I have tokophobia - fear of birth). Also DV (I hit my husband 3 times in Dec last year as a result of BPD related emotional outbursts).

[cashewnutty]

Without knowing the detail its hard to know. What have they said they are worried about?

[MS2015]

What could be some positive things to show we are willing to remedy the issues?

We already do therapy (individual and couples), go to AA & are 20+ years sober between us, engage with all SWs, are completely open about our problems, ask friends and family for support, have had a Family Group Conference, go to antenatal classes etc. etc.)

Not sure what else we can ask for in the way of support or do to show we are trying......?

[cashewnutty]

You can disagree but it is the professionals who will make the final decision. Go in calm and with a plan of what you are going to do to remedy any issues.

[MS2015]

Thanks for your reply. It's helpful hearing from a SW.

Is it ok or too confrontational do you think to openly say we don't feel a CP Plan is necessary?

[cashewnutty]

Also, i am in Scotland so maybe it is different where you are. Here, if your child is placed on the register you have weekly visits and monthly core group meeting and a review held after 3 months. I don't think it is too intrusive.

[cashewnutty]

As a SW i would say go with an open mind and a willingness to accept supports. For a CPCC to be convened they have to have serious concerns. Speak to the chair person before and tell them about your anxieties. Try to listen to what is being said. At the end of the day everyone in the room will be keen to do the best thing for your unborn child. If you can accept this then you are half way there. Good luck.