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AIBU?

Never been to a wedding

20 replies

Whaet · 17/10/2022 15:10

...is that really unusual?

I'm 37. I have no family apart from my DM, and I lost touch with all schoolfriends aged 15 when I left school due to illness, so didn't grow up with a circle of friends at all.

I do have friends I've made via work/hobbies but not many. Am I the only one?! Seems there are so many threads about weddings and people have to choose which to attend, do you have millions of friends?!

OP posts:

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Am I being unreasonable?

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tillyandmilly · 17/10/2022 18:33

I have only been to around 5 weddings in total during my lifetime - in my early fifties - I don't really have much family and only a couple of friends - you are not unusual -

SpinningFloppa · 17/10/2022 18:27

Same well as an adult anyway, none of my close family or friends have got married

Whaet · 17/10/2022 18:25

Fixyourself · 17/10/2022 16:52

Don’t worry, you’re not missing out! Weddings are shite.

I definitely feel some FOMO!

Though, I guess I've saved quite a bit in terms of outfits & gifts.

Maybe one day I'll be a guest...

OP posts:

MrsClatterbuck · 17/10/2022 17:04

I have been to lots of weddings. 1st when I was 4 in the early sixties and then a flower girl for a relative. Last one was this weekend past. I reckon about 40 odd weddings. Bridesmaid only once.
They certainly have changed over the years. The bride and groom usually didn't have a evening do and left after the meal for their honeymoon. The bride wore what we used to call her going away outfit which sometimes included a hat.

Fixyourself · 17/10/2022 16:52

Don’t worry, you’re not missing out! Weddings are shite.

GlistersisnotGold · 17/10/2022 16:52

I’m 16 years older than you and have been to 34 weddings, last one was 2019. MIL who is a further 24 years older than me hasn’t been to anywhere near as many. Guess I’m a great guest :) Two were evening only. I have turned down 3 invites and DH has turned down 1 that included me. DH and I went to six weddings one year.

TenoringBehind · 17/10/2022 16:37

I’m 51 and have only been to 3 weddings including my own. The others were my SIL’s and one as a child. I’ve been invited to one other - BIL getting married abroad - and declined.

I didn’t have friends at the age people were getting married. Everyone I know is now married or widowed or divorced (but with no desire to remarry).

Elvira2000 · 17/10/2022 16:26

No. I have only been to 3 weddings. It has made me really sad. People that I have been close to (or i thought i was) just didn't invite me, or haven't got married.

I actually had a mini break down when someone at work at had a wedding and didn't invite me. I actually thought that we were friends, but no not really (everyone else in the team was there).

I just feel sad when I hear about weddings.

EmmaGrundyForPM · 17/10/2022 16:22

I've been to lots but have got a wide circle of friends. In my 20s I seemed to go to a wedding every week at times.

My dc are in their 20s, the only wedding I'm.aware that either of them have attended was my sister's, when they were very small.

I don't think it's that unusual to have never been to a wedding

blobby10 · 17/10/2022 16:19

I've never been a bridesmaid and only attended sibling weddings.

iratepirate · 17/10/2022 16:18

I’ve been invited to many weddings. I’ve turned down all but two. (I really don’t like weddings).

zingally · 17/10/2022 16:11

I was 17 the first time I went to a wedding, for a much older cousin. I've only been to 8 in my entire life, and I'm 38. Some people seem to be going to weddings practically every other weekend over the summer, but that's not me!

You're not missing out on much OP. All the ones I've been to were boring af.

Echobelly · 17/10/2022 16:00

Nb, if people have to choose weddings it's because they often come close together in a friendship group, especially when you get to about 30 and you have friends who've been together a decade or so. Early in our relationship, DH and I had a summer of 8 weddings, mostly his friends and family, two of which were on the same weekend but luckily not same day.

Echobelly · 17/10/2022 15:57

I don't think it's that unusual. I don't have much extended family, so the first wedding I went to was my brother's when I was in my early 20s, but I know plenty of families where no adult kids have married.

If I hadn't met DH, I'd only have been to a handful of weddings by now in all likelihood (mid 40s now) - the vast majority I've been to have been his friends, only a couple of my mates have got hitched.

I think weddings are basically over now for me until if/when it's my kid's, nieces' or nephews' turns, which I imagine is a good two decades away.

MaryDerry · 17/10/2022 15:52

I went to lots of weddings as a child. Bridesmaid at many. Nothing since pre-Covid
But I was thinking the other day my children have only been to one wedding reception, not the service though (youngest is now 13).

Some of this is child-free weddings, and also one of our children is disabled, another has SEND and would mean some adjustments for them to attend. Doubt many brides and grooms need this extra thought and we are just a bit of a hassle to have about. Shame as we love a dance, and buy lovely 🎁 😉

Noviembre · 17/10/2022 15:29

I didn't until I was well into my 30s. My friends are wealthy and so they do not marry. My family don't speak to one another since before I was born.

There's a lot of waiting around, a meagre complimentary glass of cheap champagne and a tiny meal. I do not like weddings.

ComtesseDeSpair · 17/10/2022 15:29

It’s unusual I suppose to have neither any family nor any really good friends. Most people will have been to a relative’s wedding at least, I think. I go to several a year as I have a lot of close friendships which generate things like wedding invitations and find it a bit sad that many people don’t seem to have many or any friends. But the latter seems to be relatively common on MN.

WahineToa · 17/10/2022 15:25

I think I’ve been invited to 3, and I turned up at one I was surprised to be invited to only to find the groom had me working! I had to serve drinks during one part of it before we went to the meal part. I never had a wedding so no school or friends from my younger years invited us to theirs.

HighlandPony · 17/10/2022 15:23

Yes. I’ve got loads. When I had kids I moved back to the village I grew up in and basically slotted back into my old life so it was my own choice. I’ve been to too many weddings. I now refuse to be a bridesmaid ever again.

caroleanboneparte · 17/10/2022 15:17

I've never been invited to a full wedding. Only evening or as a plus one.

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